


fire in our souls (puts stars to shame)

by NoxWrites



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Angst, F/F, Firefighter AU, Minor Alex/Maggie, Minor Barry/Iris, Minor Sam/Lucy, My usual bullshit - Freeform, ill add the smexy tag when it happens
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-17
Updated: 2019-02-08
Packaged: 2019-06-12 00:28:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 52,614
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15327732
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NoxWrites/pseuds/NoxWrites
Summary: Kara Danvers has been around fire nearly her whole life. She trained years to be a firefighter and protect others from the hazard of fire. But she also recognizes the beauty of fire. The way that something must burn to be rebuilt into something bigger. There’s also a beauty in the fire that she finds coiling within herself at the presence of Lena Luthor. She smiles at the Luthor as she’s ushered from the burning building to the back of an ambulance. “I do love you, Lena.”Lena stops in her tracks, looking to Kara’s form being laid in the back of the ambulance. The doors shut tight with a click and Lena is standing behind them as they drive away from Lena to the closest hospital. The closest hospital which isn’t Luthor Medical. To have studied eight years in medicine and not save the one person you love, she’s being torn in pieces as the ambulance drives farther away. Kara’s fate that much farther from her knowledge. Not knowing if she would make it, if the fire inside Kara would burn out or if it would stay sparked. She just needed Kara’s fire to stay sparked for a while longer, if for no other reason than to tell Kara she loves her as well.orthe firefigher!au





	1. some women fear the fire, some women simply become it.

**Author's Note:**

> Just a head's up: 10-4 = Acknowledgement, 10-23 = Arrived at scene, 10-70 = Fire alarm, 10-76 = En Route

“Station One Three, come in, Station One Three.” 

 

The static of the radio echoes in the office. On the station’s couch, Kara turns her head to listen as the static clicks on and off. She stands from the couch, walking over to the radio once she’s up. She pulls the transmitter off the box and pulls it to her mouth.

 

“Go for Station One Three.” She leans against the table where the radio sits.

 

“Station One Three, we have a 10-70 in progress at White Hart and Harrington.” 

 

“10-4 dispatch, Engine Five Nine on it’s way.” Kara slips the transmitter back onto its slot at the side of the radio before turning to the small switches that line the wall behind it. 

 

Kara flips the third switch over, the light above it turning from a dull red to a bright green. The entire station comes alive as the fire alarm rings wildly through the building. Kara immediately leaves the common area and heads through the halls into the garage of the station.

 

The sides of the garage are lined with lockers and extra supplies, spare hoses and extra flashlights. As Kara turns to the left she immediately opens her locker and begins to pile on her attire. She pulls down her jacket and air tank, letting her items fall to the floor. She leans her air tank against the lockers as she pulls out the rest of her items.

 

Around her three other firefighters come into the station from different directions. Alex rushes to Kara’s side and begins pulling out her own equipment. Lucy and Vasquez are right next to them and they all are hustling to pull on their attire.

 

In her head she’s counting in thirty second increments, each increment with a list of items she needs to have on before her next increment can begin. She counts her first thirty, making sure she gets her pants on along with her jacket and her air tank. Her second thirty count gets her mask on followed by the hood to cover her skin, she tucks the excess of the hood underneath her jacket, keeping it tight against her neck. She gets to her third thirty second mark as she connects her mask and air tank along with clicking on her utility belt. She grabs the helmet from the floor and rushes to the middle engine. 

 

Her sister slides into the driver’s seat of the engine before her, in the back piles in the two other fighters and Kara pulls herself into the passenger seat. As she gets in she puts her helmet on and checks behind her to see Lucy and Vasquez slipping on the waist seat belts. Each one is tightening their tanks and belts before sliding on gloves. 

 

She turns forward, lifting up and taking the transmitter from their engine’s radio. “Dispatch this is Engine Five Nine, 10-76 to the 10-70 at White Hart.”

 

“10-4, Engine Five Nine.”

 

Alex begins pulling out of the garage, as they exit the station and hit the street Alex starts up the sirens. The universal wails of the sirens makes Kara’s heart beat faster, her heart begins to match the pace of the sirens as they rush down the streets. Kara starts shoving her gloves on as they barrel through the street, slipping her sleeves into the gloves and tightening the wrist. Alex holds one hand out and Kara starts doing the same for her sister as she drives through traffic. The cars pull to the side and Alex is able to easily get past a large sum of traffic through downtown.

 

“Twenty that Kara gets hit on by the Channel 7 news reporter.” Kara hears from behind her, she turns her head over her shoulder and gives Vasquez a glare.

 

“Twenty that it’s an EMT.” Lucy nudges Vasquez with her shoulder.

 

Kara rolls her eyes. “Guys, this is our job, stop betting.” 

 

“Put me down as twenty that it’s Channel 13.” Alex laughs, looking forward as she takes a turn. 

 

“Well then, Forty that Precinct Seven Five sends Detective Sawyer and you complain about it all the way back to the Station.” Kara raises her eyebrows, emphasizing the constant recurrence of a scene that happens to nearly every call they respond.

 

Alex gives her a glare and Kara chuckles as she pulls the transmitter back to her mouth, “Engine Five Nine, 10-23.” 

 

Alex pulls the engine up to the scene, surrounding the three story building is a circle of police cars and a two ambulances. The police move three barricades away and allow them to get inside the half circle that surrounds the building. Approaching from the other side is another fire engine that’s already settled in and began to work around the building. Alex parks the engine and begins to use the panel on the center console to unlock the ladder’s latches and open the hose pump.

 

Kara slides out of the seat, helping Lucy and Vasquez down off the back and then she walks forward to a group of officers and firefighters talking. Kara waves at Alex who simply nods her head in understanding. 

 

“What’s the situation?” Kara shouts over their conversation as she approaches. 

 

One of the firefighters turns to Kara and walks away from the group to her, “Fire started on the second floor, we have first and second floor tamed and got everyone evacuated. Third floor is out of control and we have one family still inside, one mom, three kids. My guys are in but only have four minutes left of oxygen.” 

 

Kara nods in understanding, looking up at the third floor which currently has broken windows ejecting flames, the smoke collects around the roof and rises to the sky. The normal blue of National City’s sunny skies turns an ashen grey as the smoke finds traction in the air and starts to spread. Sitting around the outside of the burning building in the two ambulances are the residents, currently being attended with oxygen and EMTs to help with burns. 

 

“Okay, we’ll take the ladder up to the third floor, enter on the front at that third window over.” Kara points to the window she’s designated. “If you could give us some water coverage as the ladder gets up so the fire isn’t as prominent that would help. We’ll send in three and pull your men out. When they get out make sure to sweep the lower two floors to check the fire is completely at bay.” 

 

“Copy that.” The firefighter nods before turning around and jogging off to his own engine. 

 

Kara turns around and walks to Alex who is cranking the ladder upward, she gives Alex the window she wants to access and Alex nods in agreement as she continues to crank it upward. The other engine has already started to spray the window and the surrounding wall. Kara jogs up to Lucy and Vasquez as they check their flashlights, checking the batteries.

 

“We’re going up to the third floor, one family. We’re also pulling out Station Eight Five’s men who are inside already.” Kara walks with them over to the back of their engine. 

 

Alex cranks the last bit of the ladder and nods her head to them, motioning upward with her hand. Kara starts first, climbing the few steps of the back of the engine before clicking her belt to the ladder’s railing. She’s followed by Lucy and Vasquez, both of them following with their belts clicked to the railing for safety. Around Vasquez’s arms are three extra extension cords and clips.

 

As Kara approaches the top, keeping her eyes on the window, she motions to the men on the hose. Their water pressure lowers and gives Kara time to unclip and carefully step from ladder to window. She turns around once inside, her mask already bombarded by the evergrowing smoke within the room, and she offers her arms out for Lucy. Lucy steps from ladder to window. Kara motions to Vasquez to wait. 

 

Kara and Lucy walk away from the window and into the fire. The thick heavy smoke dims their vision and as they continue through the room. Kara looks on as a few flames continue to lap at the furniture and walls, the fire burning at the butterfly covered room. The heat of the room grows as they walk to the room’s door. Lucy pulls the axe from her belt, Kara takes a step to the side as Lucy begins to hack at the hinges. As the last hinges falls away from the door Kara puts pressure with her shoulder, making the door fall forward and into the hallway of the apartment the had entered. 

 

The door of the apartment to the hallway of the third floor is already open, the top hinge cracked and the door tilted. Kara waves at Lucy to follow as they exit the apartment. Lucy follows Kara’s hand to the eastern side of the hallway. Kara goes down the opposing side of the hallway, her hand goes to the flashlight attached to her shoulder. With the extra light she can make out shapes within the darkened smoke. She looks through as multiple apartment doors are kicked open, the fire inside significantly less than the fire surrounding the hallways. 

 

Kara nears another apartment when her transmitter clicks with radio static. “Kara, I’ve got Station Eight Five’s men. I’m taking them to Vasquez now.”

 

“Copy that. I think I’ve reached the last apartment.” Kara speaks over the radio. 

 

“Once I have them on the ladder I’ll head to you.”

 

“Copy that.”

 

Kara stands at the door, she leans her head inward and upon hearing a shout she begins to assault the door. Her axe breaks through the center of the door, she carves a hole out of it and steps through and into the apartment. 

 

The living room she steps into has been torched, the furniture still burns as the flames expand with time. The television’s screen has cracked and out the back of it the wires have all caught flame, the coverings have been exposed to the flames which gives them more fuel to grow. Kara stays away from the living room, moving along the back of the wall, and heads toward the shouts she hears. 

 

“Kara, I’m here.” Lucy shouts from the doorway. 

 

Kara ignores her shout, she walks forward to the door that’s slightly ajar, the wood on it is scorched and the carpet beneath her has gone to a black crisp. Kara pushes the door open slowly. As she opens and looks to the far back corner another scream is unleashed in the house. Kara immediately puts her hands up in surrender. The three smaller figures are huddled together, one girl wailing in the corner as another holds his arms around her. A tall figure has them locked behind her as her arms are extended out, putting herself between the kids and the flames.

 

“It’s okay.” The kids stops wailing for a moment, Kara listens as they break out into sniffles. 

 

Kara pulls her helmet off, setting it to the side as she kneels down in front of them. Her hands go for her mask.

 

“Kara do not-” Kara pulls her mask off as Lucy threatens her, offering it to the mother. “-son of a bitch.”

 

“Take two deep breaths.” Kara coughs as the first set off smoke enters her lungs. 

 

The mom nods her head graciously, pulling the mask to the two young girls who take deep breaths, then to the boy who coughs as he takes each one. The mother happily accepts two breaths before handing it back to Kara. Kara slips it back on, making sure to tighten the strap around the hood beneath it before putting her helmet on again. Kara pulls the mom forward, motioning for the woman to grab the boy. The mother picks up her son and steps behind Kara as Kara goes to pick up the youngest daughter. As she lifts her up the child begins to scream, Kara starts to hush her as the child kicks and screams. The eldest daughter follows Kara, holding onto her hand. 

 

The girl in Kara’s arm screams and kicks at Kara’s arms. Kara tightens her grip as they reach Lucy. Lucy takes the girl following Kara and leads her along the back wall of the fire, the three women pull the kids through the front door and as Kara hands the little girl off to Lucy the girl screams again. Kara feels her yank and tug on her sleeve but she ends up in Lucy’s hands. Kara follows lastly through the door, picking up the girl Lucy originally had in her arms. Kara holds the girl close, keeping her head against her jacket to keep the smoke out of her eyes. They make it back through the apartment to where Lucy had broken the door down. Lucy leads them through the apartment and to the window which has no flames inside the room. 

 

The water from Station Eight Five has quenched the flames within the room. As Kara pears outside the hose has begun to spray down the other windows and flame scorched walls. Kara stays at the window, holding a hand out as she let the children through first. Each kid cries out but their mother just reassures them and they head to Vasquez who is near the top of the ladder with her arms out. 

 

Vasquez uses two clips for each person, wrapping it around their stomach before clipping them onto the ladder. She walks the first two downwards, giving extra space to the ladder as Lucy comes with the third child. The mother follows Lucy and Kara stays until she’s down a significant amount of ladder rungs. 

 

Kara comes out finally, she stays at the top of the ladder and waits patiently as Alex cranks the ladder down. Kara unclips herself from the ladder and descends from the back of the truck. As she gets to the ground she listens to the applauds of the crowd that had grown around the edges of the police barricade. Five news stations have come out, each with a car and their crew surrounding the police barricade. 

 

Tearring her helmet off, Kara sets it on the passenger seat where she’ll sit on the ride to the station. She pulls her mask off, turning the air canister off, and throws it onto the seat as well. The canister sits at where her feet would go, the helmet gets tossed at the dashboard and her airmask sits on her seat as she starts pulling off her heavy attire. She’s in the middle of pulling her hood off when she feels the sting of a glove at her shoulder.

 

She turns around to see her sister with a glare on her face, “Again!”

 

“They weren’t going to make it without proper oxygen.” Kara rolls her eyes before pulling at the hood again. 

 

Alex’s glove makes contact with her hand this time and Kara hisses in pain. “Stop breaking protocol! I have enough nuisances to deal with today.”

 

Kara cracks a smile once her hood is off, “Oh, is the detective here today?” 

 

Kara makes a show of looking over Alex’s shoulder and around the area. She receives a quick smack on her forehead before Alex grumbles and walks away. Kara finishes getting her heavy equipment off before she’s walking to Vasquez and Lucy who are talking to Station Eight Five’s firefighters. They’re standing behind a firefighter and reporter who are off to the side, the firefighter giving the routine media answer about the fire. Kara rolls her eyes.

 

“Five bucks the reporter calls him a hero.” Kara whispers to Lucy who just laughs.

 

It’s not that Kara doesn’t recognize the courage it takes to rush into a burning building, it’s that this is their job. Fighting fires and saving people is what they do and they do it for the warm feeling that grows in their chest once everyone’s safely out of a building. The feeling of gratitude when a young girl’s cat gets out off a tree with all nine lives intact. The press makes a show out of it every time and it tends to grow on Kara’s bad side. She’s refused interviews every time asked and it usually ends with a reporter guilting her into speaking.

 

Fighting fires is Kara’s way of giving back, making sure people can come out and live another day. She took years getting over her own fear of the flames in order to become a firefighter, the heat of it still gets to her but she’s gotten better at putting on a mask in front of her emotions. She simply wants to give people the opportunity to make it through the fire and live for tomorrow. 

 

The squad waits until the police move the barricade from the street to the actual building, putting caution tape along doors and posting officers along the outside. Kara spots a specific detective going in to the building once the flames have quelled. She rolls her eyes and gets back to the engine. The reporters have dispersed or are in the action of packing up to leave and the public has scattered. 

 

One of the fighters from Station Eight Five walks over to thank Kara for pulling the men out, she shakes his hand and then settles into the passenger seat next to Alex. Once Lucy and Vasquez have piled in behind them Kara slaps the outside of the door twice and Alex pulls out of the scene. 

 

They are able to make it to the station in ten minutes and waiting for them in the garage is their chief, his hands crossed over his chest as they pull into the garage. Kara slips from the passenger seat and goes to debrief J’onn before Alex cuts her off and begins the report. Kara chuckles and turns around to pull down her air tank, she walks it over to the wall, leaning it up against her locker. She grabs her hood, helmet and mask, hanging the mask and helmet in her locker before she strips from her jacket and gloves, her pants stay on as she begins to take the attire and set them in a pile. 

 

Vasquez and Lucy pile their own jackets and gloves into the pile, tossing their hoods in the pile. Kara motions for them to bring her the air tanks and she drags each one individually over to the large air canister in the back of the garage. She hooks the three of them up to the canister and watches the pressure reading tick back to green, each tank full of new air. Behind her, Lucy and Vasquez have taking the pile of clothes and walked inside. Alex is walking over to her, tugging her own tank off and hooking it onto the canister as Kara puts the three others in their designated spots. 

 

“Did you tell J’onn?” Kara whispers, checking over her shoulder to see if their chief is still in the garage.

 

“No.” Alex grumbles as she watches her pressure indicator.

 

“Thank you, I appreciate it.” Kara pats Alex’s shoulder.

 

“God, what is that smell. Is that your pants?” Alex gags and causes Kara to laugh as she starts looking at her pants.

 

“No, I don’t think-”

 

“Holy shit, Kara!” Alex grabs Kara’s arm and Kara releases a hiss of pain.

 

From the doors of the garage to the common room, Lucy comes out with a jacket in hand. “Kara, did you see this rip in your jacket?” 

 

Kara turns around as Lucy’s hand goes through the hole in Kara’s arm of her jacket. Kara looks back at her sister and her arm in question to see a large burn that stretches the length of her upper arm and the width of three fingers. Kara’s eyes go wide and she assumes the adrenaline that was in her, preventing her from feeling the pain, has worn off as she starts to holler in pain. 

 

Lucy drops the jacket and goes to a cabinet hanging off the garage wall, she rips through the items and comes rushing to Kara’s side. Alex pushes Kara over to a chair in the back of the garage, sitting her down as Lucy comes over with a first aid kit. 

 

Lucy kneels next to Kara, Kara who is now panting heavily through her nose, and she pulls out three small bottles that rattle with the medication inside. Kara sticks her other arm out and Lucy pours three small white pills into her hand. Alex jogs away and into the common room, coming back with a bottle of water. Kara puts the pills in her mouth, followed by a large swig of water. Lucy pulls forth another bottle and sits it on the side while she digs for the gauze pads. 

 

“This is going to hurt, on three okay?” Kara nods her head as her sister lines the cold water bottle with the burn. “One.” Alex immediately tips the water and pours it along the burn. Kara hisses out in pain and bites down on her lip, drawing blood. 

 

As Alex empties the bottle on her arm Lucy immediately begins to spread an antibiotic cream on her arm, spreading it thin before adding another layer. Lucy steps back to wash her hands off with a small hose in the garage and Alex takes over. She pulls the gauze roll out, starting at Kara’s shoulder and wrapping the gauze down Kara’s upper arm until it’s fully covered. 

 

“We should probably take you to the burn center.” Alex speaks up once she rips the gauze from the roll. 

 

“No shit.” Lucy shouts from behind her. 

 

Kara nods in agreement, her unburnt arm holds up her burnt arm as they walk through the station and out to the parking lot behind it. Kara slides into the back seat of Alex’s black pick-up and Lucy joins them in the passenger seat. 

 

―

 

“Well, Miss Danvers, you have a minor third degree burn.” The doctor has Kara sitting on the plush medical bed, standing between Kara’s legs as she has cut away the gauze and begun to inspect the wound. 

 

Kara has been unable to keep her eyes off of the woman. Her hair is tied back in a tight ponytail, pulling all the attention to the doctor’s collarbone and neck. The collarbones that dip like the bottom of the ocean, endless and beautiful. Her neck holds her head perfectly and what a beautiful head it is, piercing green eyes are currently looking over Kara’s burn as she cuts away dead flesh. 

 

They went to the Luthor Memorial Hospital, the closest burn care to their station. Kara was immediately seated in a room but left for thirty minutes until a nurse came and asked her about the situation. Alex explained as best she could while Kara still hissed at the pain in her arm. The nurse left and said the doctor would come in shortly.

 

Shortly was five minutes.

 

Alex and Lucy ended up waiting outside, both of them unable to stop laughing once Kara first saw her doctor and forgot her first name. The doctor who just so happens to run the entire hospital. Lena Luthor. 

 

“I’m guessing by the attire, firefighter?” The doctor asks as she cuts a large piece of skin away.

 

Kara swallows the pain before nodding, “Yeah, and you would be a doctor?” 

 

Lena looks up from what she’s doing, her green eyes burrowing into Kara’s soul. “I sure hope so.”

 

_ Stupid. _ Kara berates herself as Lena chuckles and goes back to cutting at the tissue. 

 

“Don’t you firefighters have protective gear? How did this happen?” Lena asks as she takes a pair of tweezers and peels back another piece of dead skin.

 

Kara thinks for a moment, she doesn’t actually know, she has a suspicion but she doesn’t know. “There was this kid.”

 

“A child burned you?” Lena smirks.

 

Kara forgets to breathe, a doctor who makes your heart skip beats is not conducive to a healthy environment. Her mouth closes and opens repeatedly, the words forming in her mind but unable to get out fully. 

 

“I assume there’s a bigger story to this than just a child because this is a large area of skin.” Lena uses her tweezers to follow the outline of the burn which, after an hour, has fully shown itself to stretch half of her arm width. 

 

Kara laughs a bit too loud and it causes Lena to smile, looking back at her as she stands upward. Lena starts to pull the dead skin that she had put on a metal pan and toss it into hazardous waste. 

 

“If it’s alright with you, I- um,” Kara looks as Lena continues to talk and she thinks for a moment she sees the doctor blush, “I would like you to stay overnight, just for observation. To make sure the area doesn’t become inflamed or agitated.”

 

Kara nods her head in agreement. “Yeah, that’s- that’s fine.” Kara doesn’t realize what she’s saying as she’s just watching Lena’s hands typing away on the computer that is adjacent to the medical bed. 

 

“Okay, I’ll send your friends in to see you off. A nurse will come in about an hour to see to a new wrap on the burn.” Lena finishes typing on her computer and turns to Kara with a smile on her face. “I would say a pleasure to meet you, but this isn’t the best circumstance.”

 

Kara nods and smiles, “Still nice to meet you Dr. Luthor.” 

 

“Lena, please, Dr. Luthor is my mother.” Kara offers a hand and Lena goes to shake before seeing her gloved hands. 

 

Lena tugs her gloves off and tosses them in hazardous waste, going back to shake Kara’s hand. “Well, then I’m just Kara.”

 

“Okay Just Kara, I’ll let your friends know they can come into see you.” Lena smiles as Kara processes the joke.

 

Lena walks out and allows the two women from before to go inside. She walks away from the women and to the office desk down the hall. The hospital is in full swing as nurses and doctors alike rush between halls and push through others to get to their patients. She slips Kara’s binder onto the counter and begins to scrawl across the report as a nurse approaches.

 

“Want me to check on the burn victim in 1207?” The nurse looks over the desk to an upside down report.

 

Lena shakes her head, “No, um, I’ll redress the wound. To make sure it’s healing right. The burn was rather large.”

 

“Uh-huh.” The nurse nods her head before turning to the wall clock. “So, are you going to do this before you run over your 80 hour limit? Or after?” 

 

Lena looks up at the clock. “Shit. I’ll stay for another hour, can you cover for me?” Lena gives the nurse a pleading look.

 

The nurse rolls her eyes, “Of course.” 

 

“Jess you are a hero. Once I’m clocked out have Sam look at her or something.” Lena smiles and grabs the clipboard before walking back over to the room the firefighter was inside. 

 

Inside is the two women who had stepped out with a fit of giggles. Lena watches as all their eyes turn to her; she swallows her nerves as the patient’s face, Kara’s face, turns into a smile at Lena’s presence. Lena clips the binder to the edge of the bed. 

 

“Kara, I’ll redress your wound and then the nurses will be here to check on you every few hours or so. That is if you are staying?” Lena looks between Kara and the brunette who is glaring at her.

 

“She’ll be staying.” The brunette never takes her eyes off of Kara and Lena simply nods her head.

 

“Okay, she’ll be available for discharge at,” Lena looks at her wristwatch, “9 in the morning, so exactly twelve hours from now.” 

 

“Thank you, doctor.” The smaller woman behind the brunette steps around her companion before extending to shake Lena’s hand. 

 

“Thank you, Lena.” Kara’s voice is above a whisper once her short friend finishes, Lena feels a strong heat run along her neck to her cheeks as she smiles at the firefighter. 

 

Lena pulls out a few materials and sets them on the bed beside Kara. She cuts the dressing she had done just thirty minutes ago, reapplying antibiotic cream along with a coolant cream to keep the skin calm. She wraps the gauze twice around Kara’s arm, Kara’s bicep tightens as the gauze is tightened and Lena watches as her arm flexes, another rush of heat but in the opposite direction.

 

As Lena finishes she turns to Kara’s two companions, “You can stay until 10, so another hour. If you are family you can come back before her discharge at 7 but only family.”

 

The tallest companion speaks up, “I’m her sister.”

 

“Then I assume you will be here at 7.” Lena turns from the sister to Kara, a smile growing on her face as she looks at Kara. “Goodnight, Kara.”

 

“Goodnight, Lena.” Kara flashes a smile.

 

Lena leaves the room and stops outside the door, replaying the conversation in her head with a soft smile on her lips. She shakes her head, the smile disappearing from her lips as she goes back to the office desk. She unclips her badge and watches as an expectant Jess has her hand out, accepting the badge as Lena hands it over. Lena walks down the halls, saying her goodnights to the rest of the ward until she reaches her office. She pulls off her long white coat and hangs it in the corner. 

 

She closes the blinds and curtains of her office as she undresses from her scrubs to the clothes she wore to work this morning. A black button up that she tucks into her black jeans, the belt around her waist holding the belt to her waist. She slips from her walking shoes to her heels. The scrubs she wore gets shoved in a bag that she then proceeds to shove into a larger black leather work bag. With her items collected she turns off the lights in her office and leaves, locking the door behind her. 

 

She waves goodbye to another group of employees as she makes her way to the garage. The trip home is a twenty minute drive through traffic and to her apartment building. As she pulls up to the curb the valet comes to open her door, she offers her keys and hands the man a twenty dollar bill before going to the back seat and pulling her work bag out. 

 

She stands in the back of the elevator up to the top floor. The private elevator opens in the middle of her penthouse with a ding. The entirety of the apartment echoes with the elevator’s chime before settling into utter silence again. Lena kicks her shoes off, padding around her apartment with bare feet.

 

She goes to the small laundry room in the back of her apartment and begins to run a load that includes her blue scrubs from work. As the laundry runs Lena makes her way to the shower, immediately disrobing and pulling her ponytail out. Her hair flows down and as she shakes her hair out with her hand it blooms around her face. 

 

The warm water of the shower soothes her aching bones from the work day, the water lets her mind wander and float while her face hangs low. The shower pours down the back of her head and down her back. The steam of the water clearing out her lungs and pores as she absolutely loses herself in the shower. She spends thirty minutes in the shower, letting the day wash away with the dirt of work. Her mind wanders to her day, reviewing each case she dealt with today and her mind seems to have a particular interest in a young blonde firefighter. Lena lifts her face to the water, the warm water scalding her face but pulling her attention from the blonde to the feeling of warmth.

 

Lena steps out once she feels her skin pull taut, her fingers pruning as she stayed in for far too long. She dries herself off with one towel, wringing her hair dry with another towel. She wraps herself in the two towels and leaves her bathroom, walking into the living room to turn on the television. 

 

The news flashes with multiple reports that Lena ignores as she fully dries off, pulling on her silk pajamas from the closet and putting the dirty towels in the laundry basket for the next wash. 

 

“Well, we can’t say anything for sure but it seems to be a routine fire that just got out of hand. We were lucky for Station One Three who came in and helped us finish the job.”

 

Lena walks back to the television, turning the volume up as she sips the scotch from the tumbler on the liquor counter behind the couch. The man on the screen has an oxygen mask hanging from his neck, his hood pulled back but his helmet sitting on his head. His face is covered in a thick layer of soot and his eyes look red from agitation. 

 

He continues to talk about the fire and Lena wants to listen but her eyes dance across the background as she sees a tall figure with familiar blonde hair and gorgeous blue eyes waving her hands behind him. Lena smirks,  _ So that explains the burn a bit more than a child. _

 

She finishes her scotch and proceeds to turn the television off. She leaves the glass on her kitchen counter next to a pile of other dirty dishes she hasn’t gotten to cleaning. She turns to lights off of each room as she makes her way to her bedroom. FInally tucking herself into her sheets and closing her eyes to the coming sleep. 

 

―

 

She can’t remember when she fell asleep but she remembers the brutal wake up she receives by the clang and clash of pots and pans. She’s up immediately, eyes open and body upright in bed. She listens for a moment, seeing if she misheard.

 

_ “Shit.” _

 

She rolls her eyes, taking a deep breath before she pulls herself out of bed and wanders outside to her kitchen. She stands at the kitchen island, a woman at her sink who is scrubbing away at dishes while the microwave ticks down. Lena crosses her arms before clearing her throat.

 

The woman at the sink turns around with a shy smile. “Did I wake you?”

 

“Just a bit.” Lena smiles, walking around the island and to the woman’s side. “What time is it, Sam?”

 

Sam looks down at her watch. “11 am.” 

 

“11! Shit I have a patient to dis-”

 

“Kara Danvers, minor third degree burn? Discharged this morning at 9 o’clock exactly.” Sam speaks as she puts the last pan in the sink, running some more water into the sink before she starts scrubbing at it. 

 

Lena deflates, “Oh. Okay.” Lena goes to the microwave Sam had running and pulls out the waffles as it starts to beep.

 

“Speaking of Miss Danvers.” Sam points the sponge as she half turns toward Lena. “Is there a reason you redressed the bandage yourself? I’m pretty sure the nurses are here for a reason.”

 

Lena opens and closes her mouth a few times, “It was a large wound, I simply wanted to make sure it was alright.” 

 

“Mhm.” Sam simply nods her head and turns back to her scrubbing. “Nothing to do with the beautiful blonde hair, or the dazzling blue eyes, or those muscles?” Sam drags out the m with purpose.

 

Lena answers too quickly, “You think she’s beautiful?” 

 

“I wouldn’t know I didn’t even see her. I caught one of her friends as she was being discharged. Which is why, you should thank me.” Sam finishes the last pan and pulls the drain on the sink, letting all the soapy water drain down. 

 

“Why, pray tell, should I thank you?” Lena pulls the syrup from her pantry, setting it next to the plate for Sam before she starts making her own breakfast.

 

Sam smiles, drying off the pan with a towel. “You get to see little miss  _ ‘Call me by my first name’  _ Kara Danvers.” 

 

Lena glares at her. “Explain.”

 

“Her friend, Lucy, also a firefighter, has invited me to their bar on Saturday. She said I could even bring a friend.” Sam smirks, setting the dry pan in the lower cabinet with the other pans. “And now all your dishes are clean.” 

 

“Thank you, Sam.” Lena kisses her on the cheek.

 

“Your welcome, see I knew you would want to go.” Sam waves the towel around as she speaks.

 

“Um, no. Thank you for cleaning my dishes. I will not be going to some bar on Saturday, I have work.” Lena points with her bowl of strawberries she pulls from the fridge. 

 

“You  _ had _ work. Jess and I both agreed you overwork yourself. So in exchange for covering you all the time, you take Saturday  _ and  _ Sunday off and Jess won’t rat you out to your mother.” Sam stabs her fork into the waffle and her smirk grows.

 

Lena sets the strawberries down with a heavy sigh. “You two are the most conniving friends.”

 

“But you love us.” Sam puts a piece of her waffle in her mouth with a smile.

 

“Maybe.” Lena grumbles and begins to pick and pull at the fruit she has laid out, putting them into a bowl before putting the bulk of each fruit in the fridge once she’s done. 

 

Lena had already taken today off, she would be going three days with nothing to do because her friends think she  _ overworks _ herself. She groans in frustration which just earns a laugh from Sam. 


	2. eye contact: how souls catch fire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I cannot believe you invited the doctor,” Alex shouts out as they play basketball in the garage. She’s sitting in a crappy fold out chair watching Kara and Lucy play one-on-one.
> 
> “Don’t hate the player, hate the game.” Lucy dribbles around Kara and takes a step back, leaping up and rocketing the ball.
> 
> It bounces off the backboard and falls off the rim, into the hands of Kara. Kara dribbles back to the halfway mark of their makeshift court then starts her advance. She and Lucy started the game two hours ago and Alex was keeping score. Their games could go for a whole day depending on the number of calls they had and the energy they both retained.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [you can read chapter 3 early by supporting me on patreon for only $1 a month.](https://www.patreon.com/NoxWrites)

“I cannot believe you invited the doctor,” Alex shouts out as they play basketball in the garage. She’s sitting in a crappy fold out chair watching Kara and Lucy play one-on-one.

 

“Don’t hate the player, hate the game.” Lucy dribbles around Kara and takes a step back, leaping up and rocketing the ball.

 

It bounces off the backboard and falls off the rim, into the hands of Kara. Kara dribbles back to the halfway mark of their makeshift court then starts her advance. She and Lucy started the game two hours ago and Alex was keeping score. Their games could go for a whole day depending on the number of calls they had and the energy they both retained. 

 

“Alex, just invite the detective,” Kara says as she leaps and shoots the ball. The sound of it rushing past the net echoes in their garage and Kara smirks at Lucy. “Nothin’ but net.” 

 

Alex leans up to the chalkboard and marks the tally behind her, putting three lines down for the shot. Kara counts her tallies quickly,  _ 52\.  _ She glances at Lucy’s count, which is leading by one with  _ 53 _ .

 

“It’s a firefighter bar. Even if I wanted to, which I don’t,” Both Kara and Lucy pause their game to stare at each other before turning to Alex in sync, “it would be like asking a mouse into a wolf’s den.” 

 

“That’s over exaggerating.” Kara marks up on Lucy, her arms wide as Lucy tries to dribble around. 

 

“No, it’s not.” Alex glares at her sister, causing Kara to lose focus and Lucy fakes left before dribbling around and dunking. Alex leans up again and marks two tallies on the board behind her. 

 

Lucy rolls her eyes, passing the ball to Kara who walks over to the halfway mark to start her turn. “Whatever. Doctors aren’t the same as cops. They’ll be fine.” 

 

“They?” Kara holds her ball for a second, not dribbling as she looks incredulously at Lucy. 

 

“Travelling!” Alex shouts, pointing to her sister.

 

“What!” Kara lets out an exasperated gasp as she hands the ball back to Lucy.

 

Lucy chuckles as she crosses the halfway mark of their court and then starts down their half court. “Yes, they.” She takes abated breath. “I told Sam she could bring a friend. I assume she’ll bring doctor forest eyes.” 

 

Kara slaps the ball from Lucy’s hand, rushing back to the halfway mark and then continuing back to their court. “You mean Lena?”

 

Lucy slips on the concrete as Kara fakes and takes a shot, the ball bouncing off the backboard and falling into the net. Alex leans and marks one tally.

 

“Is that her name? I didn’t catch it between your incessant rambles.” Lucy chuckles, Alex joins in her laugh as they pry at Kara. 

 

“Fixed it!” A shout from the other side of the garage pipes up. Vasquez gets up and walks over to them with a fire jacket in her hands. She holds the arm up to Kara. “Good as new.”

 

Kara makes a T with her hand and Lucy sets the ball down, the two off them rush to Vasquez. “Oh, I owe you big time!”

 

“No problem, just buy drinks tonight?” Vasquez smiles and Kara simply nods with a smile. 

 

Kara walks over to the locker while inspecting the jacket’s arm, the hole gone as Vasquez had sown it together. Lucy shouts about ending the game and Kara just waves her off. She unlocks her locker and slips the jacket on the hook before relocking it. She turns around and walks back to where Lucy and Vasquez have now started their own game. Alex is scrubbing at the chalkboard, making a small note at the bottom of Lucy’s win. 

 

Kara pulls her own fold-out chair and sets it next to Alex. She walks away for a moment to a small mini fridge full of cold water bottles, she takes four in her hands and walks back to the court. She sets two down then hands one to Alex before she nearly drowns in her own bottle. The water feels like a blessing to her exhausted muscles and soothes the heat of her skin. 

 

“So who’s all going tonight?” Alex asks as she watches her sister down the entire water bottle before starting on a second one.

 

Lucy shoots and the ball bounces off the rim. “I know the boys will be there. Barry is going to be late but he’s bringing that reporter around, the new one.” Lucy snaps her fingers as she tries to remember the name.

 

“Iris,” Vasquez says as she starts down the court with Lucy covering her. 

 

“Yeah, Iris. Also, some other stations but who cares about them.” Lucy waves it off and continues to cover Vasquez.

 

Kara leans over to Alex, finishing half of her second water bottle. “I’m nervous.”

 

“Kara, you are a ball of anxiety. You are always nervous.” Alex rolls her eyes, leaning up once Lucy Vasquez makes a shot and marking two tallies, the ball spinning around the rim as Lucy shouts out  _ Toilet! _

 

Kara furrows her brow at Alex. “No, I’m serious. Lena’s coming tonight. I want to impress her. She’s a big shot doctor, and I’m-”

 

“First off, if Lena doesn’t like you because you’re a firefighter then she’s not worth it. Second off, jobs and income don’t make a relationship.” Alex sits back in her seat, her eyes on the game, not Kara.

 

Kara nods her head in agreement, the two of them continue to watch the game until Vasquez calls it at  _ 30  _ to  _ 39 _ . Lucy puts her arms up in celebration at her two victories, causing the three of them to roll their eyes as they make their way to the common room. They’ve played well past lunch and into the afternoon so when they go inside they all immediately break for the kitchen.

 

Kara pulls out the sandwich she only ate half of the other day, walking over to the old fold out plastic table that serves as their dining table. She sits herself down next to Lucy who is picking away at fresh macaroni that Vasquez is making. The two of them sit down next to each other and Kara’s foot starts rocketing up and down. 

 

“So what are you wearing tonight?” Lucy asks in between bites. 

 

Kara looks at her plate, looking down at her shirt and pants she is wearing. She’s in a blue henley with her sleeves rolled up and jeans. “This?” 

 

“Oh god no.” Lucy nearly spits out her macaroni. “Alex!” 

 

Alex’s head pops out from the fridge. 

 

“Please tell me you are going to help your sister dress up tonight?” Lucy looks on at Alex with begging eyes. Kara looks from Lucy to Alex, puppy eyes on display.

 

Alex groans, “Fine! Let’s go.” 

 

Kara cheers, gripping her sandwich and following Alex out with a wave to Lucy. Alex takes her from the station to downtown National City, an apartment building with a bright white coat of paint. The outside banners and overhang are a bright yellow with pink accents. Alex parks in the underground garage and together the sisters make their way up to Kara’s apartment. 

 

Kara takes her sister up with her, they go to the apartment furthest down the hall and inside. Alex looks as if she’s expecting something to run up to her but looks around in disappointment once they’re inside and it’s quite. 

 

“Where’s my son?” Alex looks around with confusion.

 

Kara snorts. “Your son? He is at the play place Clark recommended.”

 

“At least one of us if having fun.” Alex laughs and follows Kara into her bedroom. 

 

They begin to rummage through the closet. Kara pulls out numerous cardigans until Alex just rolls her eyes and begins to pick through Kara’s clothes. Kara goes and sits back on her bed, watching as more and more shirts and cardigans are tossed away. Alex rifles through shirts until she pulls forth four button-ups. Two of which are flannels, another one is a short sleeve print. The print has cartoonish cacti adorning it. The long sleeve is a simple navy blue button up. Alex chooses the dark blue button-up and a green flannel. 

 

“Pick one.” Alex holds them up and when Kara lifts a hand to the navy blue Alex pulls it off the hanger before walking out of the bedroom.

 

Kara grumbles and begins to get dressed, she hangs her shirts and cardigans as she slips on the button up. She buttons up, tucking in the front of her shirt and letting the back flow loosely. She takes a minute choosing between belts but settles on a simple brown belt that matches her boots. 

 

She comes out to Alex laying on her couch and scrolling through her phone. “Okay?”

 

Alex looks up from her phone. “Good! Let’s go.”

 

Kara pauses on their way down the elevator. Kara turns and looks at Alex, opening her mouth before closing it and then thinking. She finally decides to spit it out. “Why aren’t you changing?” 

 

“Because I don’t have anyone coming.” Alex rolls her eyes as she gets in the driver’s seat. 

 

Kara rolls her eyes and sits in Alex’s truck with silence. They pull out and head away from her apartment. Kara sits in silence, checking her phone nearly every five seconds. The time barely ticks away as they drive through the streets. They have nearly an hour until the squad meets up at the bar.

 

―

 

She spent the Friday she had off reviewing the reports for the fall. The pricing and expected values of a few Luthor Pharmaceutical medicines. She’s figured that within the next five years the pricing will rise and so she wrote down the note of speaking to Lillian about lowering them. 

 

Following Friday she managed to go through six books on her shelves that she has wanted to read but had no time. She’s managed to clean her apartment, twice. She’s managed to go out and buy some plants. All so she wastes time until Sam texts her on Saturday night.

 

_ Sam: Lucy says to come at 7. I’ll come get you at 6:30. _

 

_ Lena: I don’t know what to wear. _

 

_ Sam: I’m on my way. _

 

Lena can hear the heavy sigh of her best friend through the text message. She tosses her phone onto the bed and begins to rifle through her clothes. She debates putting on clothes rather than the underwear and bra she currently is parading around in but decides against it.  _ Sam’s seen her in less. _

 

From the closet she pulls forth four dresses, tossing them onto the bed and then setting shoes next to them on the floor of her bedroom. She imagines herself in each one, walking into a dusty old bar and immediately feels out of place even though it’s her imagination. Each dress is probably double the amount the fighters make a week and here she is, flaunting herself in these dresses. She groans, pulling the dresses off of her bed and flinging them back into her closet. 

 

The ding of her elevator pulls her from the closet, she walks out to the living room to see Sam exiting the elevator. Sam is wearing jeans and a button-up that’s half tucked in her pants. The top two buttons are undone and draw attention to the necklace that sits in the valley of her breasts. Her hair is straightened and thrown to one side. 

 

“How do you look like that?” Lena groans then walks back into her bedroom. 

 

“Pardon?” Sam scoffs at Lena as she comes following from the living room into Lena’s bedroom.

 

Lena puts a hand on her forehead in frustration. “I thought, hey why not a dress, right? I have curves might as well show them. Then I realized that they each cost more than those firefighters make in a week so I said screw it and now I’m back at square one.”

 

Sam immediately bursts into a fit of giggles. “Okay, darling, calm down. First off, this isn’t a date for you so you can’t look better than me.” Sam pushes past Lena into the walk-in closet. “Secondly, it’s a casual setting so no Prada dresses or Louis Vuitton pumps.”

 

Lena walks back and sits on the edge of her bed as she watches Sam come forth with two pairs of pants, black slim work pants and a pair of jeans. Sam sets them down on the bed before going back into the closet. Lena looks at the two jeans, weighing the options in her mind until Sam returns with two shirts, one is a tight sleeveless shirt and another is a red blouse.

 

“I already know what I want you to wear so now you pick,” Sam says as she walks to the rows of shoes that line the floor of the closet. 

 

Lena thinks for a moment, her hands wave over the two shirts before she pulls up the red blouse and then her other hand grips the black pants. She looks back as Sam steps out of the closet with a pair of ankle high boots that only have an inch or two of a heel. 

 

“Good, I would have smacked you if you picked the black one.” Sam smiles as she waits for Lena to dress, she takes the jeans and black shirt back to the closet and then lays on the bed.

 

Lena glares at Sam as she dresses. She turns to look at herself in the tall mirror inside the closet and as she looks herself over Sam comes from behind, beginning to tuck in the red blouse. Sam fluffs out the tucked in aspect, letting it be loose as to not have a tight fit.

 

Sam looks down at her watch. “Time to go!” 

 

Lena grips a small clutch and begins to put her essentials into the clutch as she follows Sam out of the apartment. They ride down in silence, Sam glancing at Lena every so often to make Lena more nervous than before. She follows Sam out of the elevator and to the front where one of the valets has Sam’s car waiting, protected by two security guards.

 

The boy smiles and walks up to them, handing Sam the keys to her car Sam smiles and pulls forth his tip. Lena slides into the passenger seat as Sam comes around to the car. Her friend sits down and starts the car, pulling away from the apartment building. Her foot taps nervously as they continue down the streets of National City. 

 

“So what is this supposed to entail?” Lena looks from the window to Sam as they cruise through the streets. 

 

“I’m not sure. Lucy just said two of the crews are going to be there and I was invited.” Sam leans forward as she checks to see if there is oncoming traffic. 

 

Lena sits up a bit, “Wait so I’m just barging in on a date.”

 

“Well, no. It is a date, I mean, I hope it is but you aren’t intruding. She said I could bring a guest if it would make me more comfortable. So I’m bringing you because it would make me more comfortable.” Sam smiles.

 

Lena looks around as they start to drive into the lower part of National City. The buildings become brick where they were steel in the more central part of National City. The lights of the street are dim in comparison, the paint is fading and the streets are lightly littered by trash. They drive through to a brick building with a neon hose wrapped around the sign. In white and red neon letters  _ The Hose House _ stares back at them. Sam drives around for a bit, keeping the location of the bar in mind as they circle around for a parking area. 

 

They find a nice parking garage a few blocks down and take their time to find a spot. Sam looks at her watch a few times as they walk out of the garage and down the sidewalk. 

 

“Someone is nervous as well.” Lena laughs as they stop at a crosswalk. 

 

“Shut up.” Sam nudges Lena with a shoulder when they cross the street. They stand beneath the neon sign that beams against the darkness. 

 

The two of them stand in the doorway and look at it before turning to each other, they both nod their heads and walk inside. 

 

It’s not difficult to see the Hose House is specifically for firefighters. The entire bar is layered in brick and mortar. The center of the bar features a large pillar stacked to the top with liquor. The bartenders sit behind an oval-shaped counter as he hands out drinks. Tables are placed on the left side of the bar, booths that don’t match and stools that don’t have a pair. The right side of the bar has four pool tables and a few benches along the wall. The walls are adorned with hanging photos, axes, and hoses, awards and posters. 

 

The photos are all lively images of different stations engaged in activity or taking a station portrait. The awards range from first to eleventh place in dozens of events. Axes hang with recognition awards and letters are pinned to a bulletin board on the wall across from the door. They have hoses lining the walls, some wrapped up and just on display while others stretch around the wall and serve as a break in the paint. Beneath the hose is a dark green paint while above the hose the brick is bare of any paint. 

 

Lena turns from the door to look at the glass case that sits next to the entrance, dozens of badges with names and pictures litter the case. The images range from people to dogs and even a cat or two. Lena breathes out as she looks through each of the names until Sam is elbowing her side and pointing to a booth in the back. A small woman is in the process of getting out of her seat, waving them over. 

 

Lena takes a deep breath before following Sam over. Sam walks through a few people and the two of them make their way to the booth. It’s crowded with Kara along with the two who accompanied her to the hospital. Amongst the women is another woman and three men sitting between them. They’re all mixed together and enjoying drinks. The man sitting next to who Lena presumes is Lucy stands out of the booth. Two of the women, one who is unfamiliar to Lena, slide out of the booth. The man who was next to Lucy and one of the women pull stools from a table towards their booth.

 

“Please sit down!” The man smiles, he looks younger than the rest of the group. Sam goes next to Lucy, sitting at the edge of the booth and abandoning Lena. Lena’s eyes nearly burst from her sockets until the two women usher her into the booth next to Kara. The unfamiliar woman slides in next to Lena and she instantly shuts down. 

 

“Okay!” Lucy speaks above the bar chatter. “So, introductions. The two who just sat down are the fabulous doctors from Luthor Medical. Samantha and Lena. Sam is the head cardiologist while Lena is a general senior consultant?” Lucy eyes Lena.

 

“Oh well, I have the pay and responsibilities of a senior consultant but I technically am just a physician. I’m technically a developmental pediatrician.” Lena nods.

 

“Cool.” Lucy smiles and Lena can see Lucy’s eyes burn at Kara beside her. “Okay so now the squad. This is Kara, who you both know.” Lucy begins to go from Kara and around the booth. “Clark, James..” She skips herself and points to the two sitting on the stools. “Winn, Alex, and Vasquez.”

 

Vasquez is the girl sitting to Lena’s right. Winn was the younger man who pulled up two stools for the group. 

 

“Are you all firefighters?” Sam points to the rest of the group. With a solid nod from the entire group, Sam opens her mouth in awe. “So I’m assuming this is a firefighters bar.”

 

“Don’t worry you guys are cool, you guys aren’t cops right?” Clark smirks and the group laughs.

 

Lena looks at Sam who is just laughing softly to herself. She nearly jumps when she feels a breath on her cheeks and a whisper in her ear. “It’s the old firefighter and cop rivalry.” 

 

Lena turns around and looks at Kara’s stunning smile as she pulls away from her ear. Lena smiles with understanding. She leans over to Kara. “Did not know that was a thing.” 

 

Kara chuckles lightly and then grips her drink. “Do you want something to drink?”

 

Lena shakes her head no and Kara doesn’t push, taking a sip of her own drink. Lena sits back and watches as conversations change quicker than a fire starts. They laugh and drink, some laughs are at the expense of others but nothing that ruins the moment. They inevitably add two more stools and all of the guys get kicked from the booth. The booth becomes a bit roomier with one less body. A firefighter, Barry Allen, came late with a date that Lena recognizes. 

 

“Iris West!” Lena smiles. Vasquez happily slides out as Lena hugs the young reporter and they all sit down together. 

 

“How do you know each other?” Barry is the one who speaks up.

 

Iris pats Lena’s hand. “I did a piece of the Luthor’s newest cardiologist. Lena was there to oversee it. Small city.” Iris chuckles. 

 

“Okay well, this booth is getting cramped. Pool?” Lucy pats the table and motions over to the other side of the bar. 

 

―

 

She can’t stop looking at Lena as they stand and play pool. Lena’s sitting at a stool watching half of the squad play pool against each other. Lucy is smiling and laughing with Sam, Sam who is laughing around and playing pool with them all. She decided to sit back with Lena when they left the booth, picking up on the doctor’s hesitancy and discomfort. Kara currently sits on a high stool at a small table with Lena next to her. 

 

Lena is nursing a nice scotch while Kara is on her second beer. They’ve mainly sat in silence as they watch the squad play round after round on the pool table. 

 

Kara remembers a question from early as Lena laughs at Sam’s horrible shot of the six ball into the left corner pocket, the ball ending up practically where it started. “Question.”

 

Lena is mid-laugh, a bright smile on her face but it doesn’t fully reach her cheeks, as she turns to Kara. “Yes?”

 

“You said you work in pediatrics, which is kids.” At the nod of Lena’s head, she continues. “I was in the burn center, and last time I checked I am most certainly not a child.” 

 

Kara thinks she catches Lena looking at her up and down, inspecting her, but then Lena meets her gaze and Kara couldn’t care less. “You most certainly are not a child. I wander around the hospital sometimes, helping where I can. You just so happened to be there when I was in the burn ward.”

 

Lena takes a sip of her drink and Kara nods her head, looking back to the pool game in front of them. Winn trying to argue he can play but Alex pointing out the last time he played the ball flew off the table and landed in the wall. Lena and Kara follow Alex’s hand to the hole in the wall that would fit a pool ball. Winn pleads to let him try again and everyone shakes their head no.

 

“Question.” Lena mimics Kara.

 

“Go for it.” Kara’s attention is immediately pulled to Lena once more. 

 

“Your jacket. Did you get a new one?” Lena seems looser now, a lot more at ease than when she first came to the bar. 

 

Kara laughs, looking at her beer as if it was the most interesting thing. “Actually no. We just don’t have the funds for new equipment so Vasquez offered to sew it back up.” 

 

“What do you mean you don’t have the funds?” The look on Lena’s face is one of pure confusion.

 

“Oh, don’t worry. It’s just, we have to be smart with our funds. So we cut back on things in order to have better equipment. I mean, if I have to choose between sewing up a jacket and getting a better air tank or getting a new jacket and keeping my same busted air tank for another five years. I would choose to sew it up without a doubt.” Kara looks to Lena, trying to calm her. The plight of not being funded enough has been an issue for years, it’s nothing new.

 

“That’s ridiculous.” Lena looks flabbergasted.

 

“That’s politics.” Kara smiles, it does nothing to lighten Lena’s attitude.

 

The two of them return to silence, watching as Barry and Iris play with Alex and Clark at the table behind Lucy and Sam versus Vasquez and James. Kara watches as Lucy lets Sam take most of the shots, helping her pick the right ball with the best advantage. The two of them laugh and smile, joking with Vasquez and James at missed and miracle shots. It’s not until Winn looks at his watch does the fun die.

 

“Oh gosh, We have to head out and sleep if we want to be able to walk tomorrow.” Winn waves at Clark and James, both who look to the wall clock and agree. The three of them depart with goodbyes and hugs. 

 

Vasquez makes her way over to Alex to take Clark’s place in the game. Lucy frowns and then smiles her wicked smile, walking over to the table Lena and Kara occupy. 

 

“No.” It’s out of Kara’s mouth before Lucy fully makes it to them.

 

“Please!” Lucy juts out her lower lip and raises her brows in a fake beg. 

 

Lena leans back and puts her hands up, “I don’t play pool.”

 

“Well, Kara can teach you!” Sam smiles and Kara watches as Sam and Lena stare, more like glare, at each other. 

 

Lucy claps her hands and walks back over to the pool table, grabbing Vasquez and James’ pool sticks. Kara stands but looks to Lena first. 

 

“You don’t have to do this if you don’t want to.” Kara motions behind her to the pool table.

 

Lena’s head moves and Kara thinks she’s looking over her shoulder, she almost turns around but then Lena is standing up and nodding her head. “No, it’s alright. I just can’t promise you a win.” 

 

“Don’t worry. Lucy is too competitive to lose even at typical games.” Kara pretends to whisper to Lena, earning a huff of frustration from Lucy as she hands over the sticks. 

 

“So basic rules, first ball in determines the team. First one to get their entire set into the pockets goes for the eight ball. If the eight ball goes in before the set is gone it’s an automatic loss.” Lucy speaks up as she collects the balls from the pockets in which they rest. 

 

Lucy reracks the balls, setting them in a nice triangle and then pulling the block away. She lets Sam take the first shot, Sam’s back lays flat and Kara can see Lucy not so subtly checking her out. Sam lines the cue ball with the stick, the angle is odd and not aimed at a ball. Then Sam pulls back and fires the stick forward the ball slams into the side of the pool table. It juts off to the left, hitting the tightly packed triangle at an angle. None of the balls fall in but they also barely moved, making it nearly impossible for Kara to find a good shot. 

 

Kara offers the first shot to Lena who shakes her head in disagreement. Kara nods her head in understanding and walks to the other side of the pool table. Lining her stick with the cue ball, Kara pulls the stick backward and steadies her arm before jabbing forward. The white ball scatters the packed group of balls. As she watches the balls scatter she looks in awe as the light red striped ball, 11, tetters on the edge of a pocket. It starts to slow down in its wavering movements until the table shakes and the ball falls into the pocket. 

 

She looks up to see Lena, leaning a little bit backward with a leg at an odd angle and she nearly bursts into laughs. Lucy is none the wiser, assessing the table as Kara tries to line up her next shot. She wants to aim the ball at the dark red striped 15 but then she stands back and waves Lena over. Lena points to herself and Kara nods in agreement. The shot is easy and a basic straight line. 

 

“I’m going to teach you to play pool.” Kara smiles and makes room for Lena where she was just standing. 

 

Lena mimics Kara’s posture from before and Kara nods her head. “Good, but loosen up here.” Kara’s hands run down Lena’s shoulders, they involuntarily slacken as Kara runs her hand across them. “And here.” Kara’s other hand comes and holds at Lena’s wrist. They’re pressed together and Kara is holding Lena into position. 

 

Kara can smell the lavender that is Lena Luthor and she gets lost in it, in the soft smell of Lena’s hair and the heat of her cheeks that rest next to Kara. The soft skin beneath her hand is different from her own rough calloused hands and the night hair Lena has captures stars in the poorly lit bar.

 

Kara falls back into the world when Lena begins to pull back the pool stick. “Okay, and um, keep your elbow loose, don’t pull back all the way. Judge how hard you want to hit it.”

 

Lena puts the stick a bit forward, not as far back as before and Kara whispers praise to her. Lena shoves the pool stick forward and it hits the center of the white cue ball. The ball then rolls forward and knocks into the 15 ball at the center. The 15 ball rolls casually into the pocket but as it does the force of the white ball knocking into it has sent the white ball to the other side of the pool table. The cue ball hits the edge of the pool table then shoots forward, knocking into the black eight ball and sending it into the same pocket as the 15 ball. 

 

“Oh! Rough luck!” Lucy smiles.

 

“Shut it, Lane.” Kara barks at her. Lucy puts her hands up in defense and just settles on laughing and praising Sam. 

 

“I am so sorry.” Lena puts the stick on the table and puts a hand to her mouth.

 

Kara simply smiles, picking up the pool stick. “It’s okay. It happens all the time, even by accident. Lucy’s lucky it happened cause with your precision, she would’ve lost.” 

 

“Really?” Lena quirks an eyebrow.

 

“Absolutely.” Kara leans against the pool table, holding up the two pool sticks as she looks at Lena. 

 

Lena looks to the pool table then to Kara with a large smile, the discomfort, and fear from when Lena was crowded into the booth is gone. Kara can see a holy glow of Lena even in the dim light of the bar. 

 

“Oh shit.” Kara doesn’t pull her eyes away from Lena even when Sam shouts. Lena looks to Sam but Kara can’t help from looking at the woman’s radiant eyes. “I definitely owe the babysitter overtime pay.”

 

“We have to go,” Lena mutters out, there’s a hesitancy when she says  _ go _ and Kara nearly asks to have Lena stay. She could easily take Lena home, well, Alex could.

 

When Lena walks to the table and picks up her jacket Kara finally peels her eyes away from her, turning instead to Lucy who is receiving a kiss on the cheek from Sam. Sam, who has to bend a bit to reach Lucy, smiles as she pulls away. The two doctors leave together, leaving the firefighters in a state of awe as they wave goodbye from the door. Kara is still staring at the door minutes after Lena has left.

 

“So, what do you think of Lena?” Kara turns to see Lucy, a smirk on her face.

 

“She’s great. A good friend.” Kara nods her head. 

 

“Uh-huh.  _ Friend. _ ” Lucy puts herself in front of Kara with a scrupulous look. 

 

“You want to go there? What about you and Dr. Arias? I saw that kiss.” Kara points a finger at Lucy in accusation.

 

Lucy shrugs. “Yeah a kiss on the cheek, I didn’t mount her trying to show her how to play pool.”

 

“I did not!” Kara looks utterly horrified at the thought of making Lena uncomfortable. “Oh gosh, I did. Do you think I made her uncomfortable? Do you think I creeped her out? What if she never wants to see me again? What if she files a restraining order?”

 

“Woah! Woah!” Lucy puts her hands on Kara’s shoulders. “You’re at an eleven and you need to bring it down to a two. Lena is a big fancy doctor, she would have definitely pushed you off if she didn’t like it.”

 

Kara nods her head quickly. “Okay. Okay. You’re right. You’re right. She wouldn’t have let me make her uncomfortable. You’re absolutely right.”

 

Lucy rolls her eyes and walks over to where Barry, Iris, Alex, and Vasquez are finishing their game. Kara turns her head over her shoulder before remembering something.

 

“Lucy? Did you catch that they left because of a babysitter?” Kara questions as she follows after her friend.

 

“Yeah, she has some kid.” Lucy stands and watches the game but nothing happens as everyone lifts their heads up to Lucy.

 

“So you aren’t going to see her again?” Alex asks.

 

“What? God no, Sam’s amazing. I’m  _ definitely _ going to see her again.” Lucy smirks.

 

“You don’t do kids, remember that one mom you tried to sleep with but her kids called at the bar and you left.” Vasquez points out.

 

“Yeah but, I don’t know. Sam’s different. I guess I’ll have to meet Ruby before I judge her.” Lucy just shrugs her shoulders and Kara’s eyes go wide.

 

―

 

Kara wakes with a minimal hangover, a simple headache that Advil could fix in thirty minutes. She’s stretched out on her bed, starfishing over her entire bed. She can feel the soft material of her pajamas, so she changed clothes before passing out. Her alarm is beeping at her persistently, so she raises her hand and taps it off. Her phone follows next. She taps the button on her phone to end the alarm before rolling over and actually picking up her phone. Multiple news notifications and a handful of texts from the crew. She scrolls past it until she gets to a notification of an unknown number.

 

_ Hi, I hope it was okay I asked Sam to ask Lucy for your number.  _

_ I realized after last night I didn’t ask  _

_ and I had an idea I wanted to pitch to you. _

_ And as I type this at nearly twelve in the morning you are probably asleep. _

_ Goodnight Kara.  _

 

Kara shoots upward, sitting up in her bed and unlocking her phone with haste. She’s immediately in her messages and opening the full conversation. She’s texting back before she can even register what she’s typing.

 

_ Lena? _

 

It takes only a few minutes but response bubbles start to float above the keyboard and Kara watches them with intent.

 

_ That would be me. _

 

Kara instantly puts her information into her contacts, if there’s a smiley face emoji next to her name no one needed to know.

 

_ What was this idea you wanted to pitch? _

 

_ Well, it would have to go through to the board of directors and my mother, so don’t get excited. But I would like to offer a fundraiser for the fire stations of National City for new equipment. _

 

Kara’s in the midst of telling Lena that she shouldn’t do that but Lena’s next text comes in quicker.

 

_ And please do not tell me that I shouldn’t do it because I may have spent all night typing up a proposal for the board meeting on Monday. _

 

Kara falls back into her bed, a heavy sigh and smile on her lips, her phone buzzes again and she’s back to sitting up.

 

_ It will take the board a few weeks before agreeing to anything but I don’t see how this could negatively affect Luthor Medical.  _

 

_ Lena, I can’t thank you enough. _

 

_ That’s what friends are for. But I am going to sleep now as I haven’t given myself rest. _

 

_ Sleep well, Lena. _

 

_ Have a good day Kara.  _

 

Kara falls onto her pillows, the picture of Lena’s smile engraved in her memory and the beautiful green of her eyes makes Kara stomach warm. She holds her phone close to her heart, nearly hugging herself. She falls asleep to the fading echo of Lena’s laugh.


	3. you haven’t just lit a fire beneath me.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She foregoes a shirt, in favor of falling into bed. The sheets against her skin make her finally acknowledge her exhaustion. She lays herself down in the center of her bed, pulling the covers over her and tucking herself into a warm bundle. While she can feel the tiredness creep through her entire body her eyes find interest in her ceiling.
> 
> Her eyes don’t wander from the ceiling. Lena can’t get the sound of Kara’s voice out of her head. She’s lived her entire life alone, not letting in anyone into her personal life. She’s lived a life of solitude but for the first time in that guarded life, she feels completely alone. A part of her wants to turn over and see the blonde in bed next to her, so she can help her calm down and wipe the tears away. Another part wants to run to the streets and scour each apartment building for a blonde with eyes bluer than the sky. None of which are rational and yet all Lena can do when it comes to Kara is irrational.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is kind of short but I didn't want to add things just for the sake of adding them.

She checks her phone once again, no notifications. She rolls her eyes and goes back to her papers that are on her desk. Since two weeks ago at the bar her and Kara had become close friends, they texted nearly all the time. If Kara had a call she would let Lena know the moment she left and the moment she got back. If Lena had an emergency she would do the same for Kara. Their night calls had become therapeutic.

 

The papers in front of her, not therapeutic. She’s reading through Luthor Medical’s quarterly reports and she feels her mind melt due to exhaustion. The numbers seem to blend together as her vision goes blurry from boredom. She has to shake herself out of it, actually paying attention to the numbers she needs to mark. She’s happy she only has to look at quarterly reports for Luthor Medical and not the entirety of the Luthor Corporation.

 

Lena can remember coming home at the Luthor Manor and Lionel raving on about numbers and accounts. She rubs her temple as she finishes one section of the reports, tossing them to the side and into a tray with the label “out” taped on its front. She pulls from another tray with the label “in”, the next stack a bit thicker as it contains the fiscal reports for medicine. Every medicine used within the entire hospital is listed along with how much was used, the cost of replacement, and the cost covered by those who needed the medicine. 

 

It’s not difficult for her to find the differences and the cost that would bleed over to Luthor Corp. She spends six hours going through each ward’s report, calculating the differences of each purchase and finding the overall expense of energy in the building. She’s able to slide the reports into her out tray, picking each paper that is necessary and leaving the rest to be sent out to Lex. She pulls a folder out from her desk, slipping each paper she deemed necessary into the pockets of it and pulling a sharpie from a repurposed mug. She scribbles  _ Board Meeting  _ onto the front of the folder. 

 

Three knocks at her door and the turning of the knob indicates Sam’s entrance. She’s just sliding her folder into her bag as Sam opens the door fully. 

 

“Lena, are you ready?” Sam looks from her watch to Lena who is getting out of her chair and grabbing her purse.

 

She double checks everything in her purse before nodding her head. “Yeah, let’s go.” 

 

Sam and she make from Lena’s office to the halls of the hospital, Sam scrolling and texting away to Ruby most likely. Lena is reviewing her pitch in her head, memorizing the key points and answers to any questions that could arise. 

 

“You nervous?” Sam locks her phone and slides it into her pocket.

 

Lena shakes her head, “No. I’m ready.”

 

“You know, for someone who is only friends with a firefighter you sure are doing a lot more than what average friends would do,” Sam notes as she holds the elevator door open.

 

They pack inside with a few nurses beside them. The nurses and staff leave as Lena and Sam ride the elevator all the way up to the eleventh floor of the hospital. Lena walks out of the elevator with a deep breath and Sam follows her out. Together they walk down the hall and to a double door entrance with frosted glass and silver door handles. 

 

“I just think it’s ridiculous Kara has to wear a stitched together jacket, it’s outrageous and impractical. What happens if the stitches tear? Then she has to restitch it and it’s just a fiasco.” Lena waves her hand in the air to emphasize her point. Sam simply chuckles and opens the door for Lena.

 

In front of Lena is a glass table that stretches nearly the entirety of the room. Around them are fifteen chairs on each side with one all the way at the head of the far end of the table. The chairs have a mesh back and thin bottoms with minimal support. Seated in the chairs are men and women in different suits but all copied and pasted from the same executive catalog. Lena finds her seat near the head chair, next to an empty seat that she knows is Sam’s typical seat. 

 

After everyone is seated for nearly five minutes, the door opens once again and in comes Lillian Luthor who is the personification of sophistication. Her hair up in a tight bun without a hair out of place, her suits bares no frayed strings or lint or wrinkle. She’s nearly perfect, if Lena didn’t know her. 

 

Lillian takes a seat at the head of the table, the room stays silent for a moment longer until she clears her throat. “Can we begin?”

 

A resounding raise of voices saying  _ yes _ makes Lillian nod her head. “I believe Ms. Luthor requested the floor first.”

 

Lena nearly refused. The name, the conditions that go along with it, the implications when someone finds out what name she’s tied with, it makes her numb. Her mother knows this, it’s her making Lena feel little, but she won’t have it. Instead, she nods her head and stands. With the push of her chair, she makes herself larger, taking up the entirety of the small space provided to her. All eyes turn on her, her mothers are glazed over as usual but the rest of the board is looking on with focus.

 

“This quarter’s fiscal report has some of the best numbers in this hospital’s entire time. With a drop in expenses and a rise in proceeds from grants, government funds, Luthor Corp’s Medical Budget, and the new equipment; the company is running at a near optimal level. The costs of the equipment were expensive at the time and you all nearly said no to the subsidiary funds for the equipment but now we’re making that money back with a 23% increase in earnings. So, with this money that we are saving, I have a proposition to raise the Luthor’s name into the media for a bit, garnering attention and hopefully some new names to our grant list.” Lillian’s eyes fall from the glazed state, an actual interest grabs her attention and she leans forward with a nod for Lena to continue. “A fundraiser.”

 

“We run nearly five fundraisers a year, what would be so special about this one?” A board member speaks up with a roll of his eyes.

 

Lena takes a deep breath, ready to bite the man’s head off but when she looks to Sam who is nodding her head she feels calmer. “Well, the fundraisers we run are entirely for some Luthor Corporation department or another. This fundraiser would be for the fire departments of National City.”

 

“Why would we want to help them?” A board member form the back speaks up.

 

Lena’s nearly about to answer when Lillian speaks up, “If we were to advertise a fundraiser for the fire department it would not only appeal to those within the medical industry but also those in the protect and rescue industry. We could expand it to the police department or even have a secondary event.”

 

Lena nods as if that was her answer, Lillian nods in tune with her before standing. She pats Lena’s shoulder, ordering her to sit down in the politest way possible. Lena sits in her chair and feels Sam’s hand on her thigh with a soft pat. She simply nods to Sam and turns her head over her shoulder to watch Lillian proceed to grow off her idea. She explains idea after idea, how each member can contribute and with a few heads nodding the board seems to grow into the idea. 

 

Lillian’s almost wrapped on the pitch when Lena hears her phone ring. The board members turn to her, her mother’s glare the fiercest of all, as they watch Lena bring the phone up out of her purse. She’s nearly going to hang up immediately when her mother’s throat clears.

 

“Take it outside.” Lillian’s voice is tight and stern. Lena grips her phone and takes a side door to a hallway. 

 

Lena waits for the door to close completely before answering the call. “Kara? I’m in the middle of a meeting, can I call you back?”

 

―

 

“Oh, I’m sorry. I just got out of a call and I-”

 

“Called?” Lena chuckles on the other end of the line. Kara fakes a smile, grateful that Lena isn’t there to ask what’s wrong.

 

“Are you okay?” Lena’s voice is soft and concerned. 

 

“Oh, yeah, I’m good. Sorry to interrupt your meeting.” Kara leans against the wall of her apartment, sinking to the floor.

 

“It’s okay. I’m glad to have a break from it. But I’m trying to pitch something so I do need to go back. Can I call you when I get home?” Kara nods her head realizing Lena can’t see her.

 

“Yes, of course.” Kara clarifies and nods her head again before remembering Lena’s not there. 

 

“Okay. I’ll be done in an hour. Bye, Just Kara.” She can see the smile on Lena’s face. 

 

“Bye, Doctor Lena.” Kara listens to the end tone longer than she can count. She loses herself in the monotonous tone.

 

_ Do you hear things after death? Wherever you go, do you hear things? _ Kara’s head falls back against the wall with a  _ thud. _

 

It was supposed to be empty. It was an abandoned building. It was to be bare of life. Bare. Abandoned. Empty. She can feel her arms tremble as she cracks. It’s like a window with too much pressure on one side. The heat of her sadness presses and pushes on the glass. Her head pumps with a beat unfamiliar to her own heart. It’s a rapid count of ten and a long break where her lungs replace the beat of her head. 

  
Her arms quake as her head throbs. She can feel the resistance of a chest against her hand. She can feel the smoke covering her vision when she took the mask off, not even fully out of the fire just on the sidewalk. Her eyes cloud up from the memory of smoke. She can feel the tears of now and then blend together as she looks at her trembling hands. 

 

She clenches her hands in a fist, clenches her jaw tight, and her eyes shut. She breathes deeply and harshly, each breath harder than the last. Her arms go tight to her chest and her knees raise up. She’s alone in her apartment and the lights are off, it’s pitch black despite the falling sun that still illuminates the world. The blinds have been closed and the curtains were drawn. 

 

Kara’s almost completely broken when a chime rings from her phone.

 

The chime pulls more than just her attention. From her bedroom, she hears the clang of metal against metal. She doesn’t pull herself away from the ball she's formed, curled in on herself. She hears him more than sees him approach, his claws scrape against the wooden floor. His wet nose presses into Kara’s arm.

 

She opens her eyes slightly, the edges of her vision are blurry with contained tears but she can see the grey pitbull clearly. His blue eyes look back at her and he presses his nose to her forehead. Kara forces a smile as he tries to press in closer to her. She moves one arm to wrap around him and he presses his whole body next to her. The heavy feeling makes her come to a pause. She looks down at her phone. 

 

_ Maybe a little longer. will call ASAP. _

 

She clears her eyes, the back of her hand wiping away unshed tears, as she reads the text message. Lena’s name and the nearing call they’ll share brings Kara to a state of calm. Her hands run through her hair as she sets the phone on the wooden floor of her apartment. She wobbles to her feet, her knees shaky with weariness as she drags herself from the floor to her bathroom. The pitbull following at her heels. He sits at the entrance of the bathroom, facing away as if he knows of privacy.

 

With heavy movements she makes to peel her clothes off, the tattered shirt she wore to work finds its place on the tile amongst her thin stretchable shorts she’s already tossed. Each piece falls away in seconds and she can feel her dreariness increase as she continues to exert energy. With every movement, a burning in her muscles engulfs her entirety. 

 

She closes herself in her shower, turning the handle to the hottest point. The steam starts immediately, the heat of the water singes her skin and it burns in the way she needs it. Her hands hold against the tile wall and she lets the water pour down her back. This is where she cracks again, a soft sob escaping her lips as she burns the day off her skin. 

 

The smoke that has clung to hair falls from the roots to the tips then down her back, the shampoo she rubs deeply in picks and plucks the grime from her scalp. She scratches deeply as she can with her blunted nails and she knows she didn’t break the skin but she almost thinks she’s bleeding. Her hands fall down the back of her hair as she puts her head back under the water. The scalding water burns at the hair and the shampoo, cleaning the shampoo out of the hair and it runs down Kara’s back into the drain below. 

 

Beneath her, the water turns grey with the smoke that stained Kara’s skin. She looks down with disdain, frustration in her soul. Kara grabs the soap and scrubs away the skin. The partially tanned skin of hers turns red with the strength she scrubs but as the friction fades and the skin calms down the difference is noticeable. From a smoke-stained skin to clean, Kara washes away the dirt of today through the scalding water and the soap that pulls it from her skin. Kara turns the water off as soon as she’s done. While her skin is clean it’s still a pink shade from the heat of the water. 

 

As she steps out of the shower she wrings her hair out into the drain, pulling the other towel around her chest. She wraps her hair with the towel and puts it up. Against the steam covered mirror Kara can barely see herself, but she can see a girl. A short five feet, with wavy brown hair tied in a matted ponytail. Her skin is covered in smoke and grime. Kara swipes at the steam of the mirror and she doesn’t know what she expected. She goes from seeing the girl to herself and for some reason, it’s worse. 

 

It’s Kara, and yet not Kara at all. It’s Kara with less defined features, shorter by nearly a foot, her hair more bleached blonde than the dirty blonde she has now. Her skin is a bit smoother and her hair is sticking out at wild angles. A part of her wants to punch the mirror, do anything to take this away. 

 

She just turns away from the mirror, pulling the towel off of her hair before hanging it on the towel rack, distancing it from the clean towels. Her hair falls against her back, the loose locks are now wet and stringy. Her body, while clean, still has a million bricks on her back. It takes time but she manages to toss her clothes in her laundry basket. The dog leaps onto her bed, circling three times before laying down. She changes into short pajama shorts with a tank top. She falls into her bed with wet hair, exhaustion of different forms affecting her in different ways. 

 

She’s nearly asleep, her eyes heavy with sadness as she tries to forget today’s trials. She’s nearly asleep when her floor begins to vibrate, her phone’s ringtone for Lena plays in her living room. With her last ounce of strength, she sits up in bed. 

 

“Smokey, phone.” Kara points to the floor just outside her bedroom door. 

 

Smokey lifts his head up, follows Kara’s finger to the floor and bounces off of the bed and over to the door. He lowers his head to the phone and puts his jaws around it, without pressure on it, he pads back to Kara and drops a slimy phone into her hand. Kara takes a few tissues and wipes his slobber away. She pats the spot next to where she sleeps, by the pillows, not towards the edge of the bed which is his typically sleeping spot. 

 

She slides to answer the call, rolling herself back into bed with Smokey laying down right next to her. With a true smile, she looks at him and rubs on the top of his head, between his ears. He closes his eyes and lays his head down as Kara’s rubs slow and then stop. 

 

“Lena?” Kara’s voice is heavy with sleep.

 

―

 

“Kara, are you okay?” Lena presses the button on her elevator to go up to her apartment. She can hear a weariness in Kara’s voice.

 

A hum comes from the other line. “Yeah, long day. How was your meeting?”

 

Lena isn’t convinced but she puts her questioning on hold, letting Kara open to her at her own pace. “It was something. Lillian ripped my proposal from under me and turned her own twist on it.” She sighs and rubs her forehead with her free hand.

 

“How so?” Kara’s voice sounds a bit more awake as they continue to talk.

 

“Well, I did my whole proposal and of course the other board members didn’t fully support it so Lillian decided to make it more appealing using the same points that I had prepared. Then at the end took it as her own idea.” Lena tosses her bag on the floor next to her living room table. 

 

“Can I know what the proposal was?” Kara asks with wonder.

 

Lena chuckles, she wants to tell Kara but she also wants to make sure the fundraiser is actually going to happen. “It’s top secret I’m afraid.”

 

Kara lets out a little laugh and it makes Lena smile, something may be wrong but hopefully, she’s helping. “Well, whenever you can share I get to know first right?”

 

“Absolutely.” Lena kicks her shoes off, padding around her apartment with bare feet and a smile on her face. “What about you, how was your day?”

 

She hears the sigh, the heavy breath Kara takes and then silence. She continues with trepidation, “Kara?”

 

“She was fourteen.” Kara’s voice is hoarse and Lena can hear it being followed by tears.

 

“Kara, who was fourteen?” Lena’s practically running to get her shoes back on her feet.

 

Kara’s sobs echo in the phone and Lena can feel her heart cracking for Kara. “Kara, sweetheart, I need you to breath okay? Can I come to you?”

 

There is a silence and a few more heavy breaths. “No, no. I’m-” A large breath, “I’m fine.”

 

“Can you talk to me?” Lena wraps her arms around herself, her apartment feeling colder and empty.

 

“It was supposed to be abandoned, Lena. But she and her family didn’t have anywhere else to go.” Kara’s sobs pick up again, this time a bit contained by her breathing. “I got her out, but she wasn’t breathing. Too much smoke.” 

 

“Oh, Kara.” Lena hugged herself, wishing she could be with Kara to hold her, to let her know it would be okay.

 

“I- I hate this. I hate feeling like this.” Kara’s voice trembles and Lena has to shut her eyes before she starts crying.

 

“Kara, are you sure I can’t come to you?” Lena’s hands are itching, to just hold her and help her. She’s a doctor and to feel Kara hurting, only a few minutes away, it’s against everything in her to sit at home.

 

Kara sniffles on the other end of the line. “No, I’ll be okay. I just needed to talk to you.”

 

“Is Alex there?” Maybe her sister is helping her.

 

Another sniffle, “No, I actually need to apologize to her.”

 

“Why?” Silence. “Kara, what happened?”

 

“I snapped at her when we got back to the station. I didn’t mean to.” Kara’s voice trembles again.

 

“You were just stressed and unwell. It’s okay.” Lena nearly drops her phone. The girl who died, it was the call Kara had taken before Lena’s meeting. “Oh my god, Kara. Kara is this why you called me earlier?”

 

Silence.

 

“Oh, Kara I am so sorry. Why didn’t you tell me?” Lena falls to her couch, her head in her hand as she slowly crumbles.

 

“You were in a meeting. It wasn’t important.” Kara’s voice is quieter than it has been the entire conversation.

 

“Kara, you are more important than any meeting. I am sorry if I made it seem otherwise.” Lena stands from the couch. She paces over to the island of her kitchen, flipping open the laptop that sits at the counter. Her emails glare back at her, as the laptop is opened it refreshes its browsers as programmed and Lena’s email count grows. She shakes her head and hovers over to her calendar.

 

She scrolls through to tomorrow’s date, looking at everything in her schedule. Three meetings, an equipment check, four intern updates and two tests. She groans as quietly as possible, biting into her hand in frustration.

 

“Kara, what are you doing tomorrow?” Her free hand mouses to the sidebar of her calendar.

 

“I have a day off.” Lena nods in understanding despite Kara not being there.

 

“Okay, how about you and I go and do something?” Lena clicks the delete button, the calendar’s template changes a bit and each item forms a checkbox next to it. She clicks each one and then the trash can icon. 

 

“Don’t you have work?” Kara asks with confusion.

 

Lena holds her phone between her shoulder and ear, closing out of her calendar and opening up a new email. “Oh, no. Tomorrow I don’t have anything scheduled so I’ll just tell Jess I’m off, she’ll be happy since she sees me as a work addict.” 

 

“Is there a group for that? Like alcoholics anonymous but work addict anonymous?” Kara chuckles but Lena can hear the tears still in her throat. 

 

“If there is, Jess will find it.” Lena wants to smile but she can still feel the pain from Kara radiate through the phone. “So, tomorrow?”

 

“Tomorrow,” Kara says with a sigh.

 

“Will you be okay?” Lena looks away from her email, looking out the window as if she can see Kara through all the buildings and all the bricks despite not knowing where the girl lived. 

 

“Yeah, thank you, Lena. I’m going to go to bed.” Kara says and her voice is hoarse from the crying and weariness.

 

“Goodnight Just Kara.” Lena has to smile, Kara may not see her but she hopes she can feel her.

 

“Goodnight Doctor Lena.” Lena hopes she felt a smile as the end tone starts to hum in her ear. 

 

She locks her phone, setting it to the side as she goes back to writing an email. She needs to write nearly five tonight. Her first one is to Jess, telling her of an emergency that came up and how she won’t be coming in for work tomorrow. Why Jess replies at 11 o’clock with a simple smiley face, Lena doesn’t know.

 

She types out the most standard business emails she can think of, nearly copy and pasting them and then changing the event she’ll be missing and optimal replacements for her. She sends them out quickly, the entire endeavor takes forty minutes and then she closes her laptop. She doesn’t wait for a reply from anyone.

 

Lena drags herself from the counter to her bedroom. With lazy movements she pulls off the button up she wore, untucking it from her pencil skirt which she lets fall away as she unzips the side. She doesn’t bother with picking either item up, instead, she simply walks to her closet, to a dresser in her walk-in closet. She pulls out the shortest shorts she has, slipping them on over her panties and then turning the closet light off. 

 

She foregoes a shirt, in favor of falling into bed. The sheets against her skin make her finally acknowledge her exhaustion. She lays herself down in the center of her bed, pulling the covers over her and tucking herself into a warm bundle. While she can feel the tiredness creep through her entire body her eyes find interest in her ceiling.

 

Her eyes don’t wander from the ceiling. Lena can’t get the sound of Kara’s voice out of her head. She’s lived her entire life alone, not letting in anyone into her personal life. She’s lived a life of solitude but for the first time in that guarded life, she feels completely alone. A part of her wants to turn over and see the blonde in bed next to her, so she can help her calm down and wipe the tears away. Another part wants to run to the streets and scour each apartment building for a blonde with eyes bluer than the sky. None of which are rational and yet all Lena can do when it comes to Kara is irrational.


	4. you have ignited my bones.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “What do you see?” Kara turns her head from the sky to Lena.
> 
> Lena quickly glances away from Kara, she tries to tell herself she wasn’t staring at Kara, and looks to the sky. “Oh, um. Well, that one.” Lena points to a large cloud directly above them. “That looks like..” She tries, she really does but she’s never done this before and her mind doesn’t know what to say. “.. like a cloud?”
> 
> Kara bursts into laughter, startling smokey from his almost sleep. “No, seriously, Lena. What do you see?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fluffy chapter!

She hears her bedside table rumble, three consecutive rumbles as her phone vibrates the entire table. Her half awake consciousness grabs at her phone, pulling it to her eyes. Kara sees Lena’s name and the blurry text below it. She rubs at her eyes to clear the sleep, rereading the messages with a clear vision.

 

_ Lena: Hey, I know I said the whole day but I do have to clear some things with a few people.  _

_ Lena: So if it’s okay I’ll text you when I’m done? _

_ Lena: I hope you are doing better than yesterday. _

 

Compared to yesterday, she is fine. Compared to yesterday, she is better than ever. But there is still a dark beast gnawing on her heart. She chooses to push it to the side, focus on anything else than it’s ever-growing presence. That’s when she finally throws herself out of bed. Unraveling herself from the blankets, Kara replies to Lena before peeling away from the bed and starting for her kitchen. 

 

_ Kara: Of course, text me whenever. _

 

Before she even starts breakfast she goes to her windows, pulling apart the curtains and rolling up the blinds. The sun of the morning bakes her apartment in a warm glow, the rain and darkness of last night a forgotten memory as the sun’s persistent presence radiates a warmth that burns away the darkness. She stands for a moment, stretching her arms as she is covered in a warm aura that grows as the sun continues to rise. 

  
A thud from her bedroom pulls her attention away from the windows. Out of her bedroom comes a tail wagging pitbull with sleep covered eyes. Kara claps her hands against her thighs to draw his attention and Smokey immediately perks in her direction, his tongue hanging from the side of his mouth. Kara smiles as she holds her hands out and his face slots itself perfectly between her hands, she scratches and rubs at the side of his face and then between his ears at the top of his head. He barks once she’s done, raising onto his back legs with his front paws hanging in front of him. She shakes her head before pulling him up into her arms, his arms finding a place over one of her shoulders as she carries him around the apartment. 

 

“What are we having for breakfast today?” She asks Smokey who just rests his head against his paws on Kara’s shoulder. “Pancakes?” She pulls out a box from her fridge before shaking her head no and putting them back. “Waffles?” Smokey barks once and Kara nods her head, “That’s what I was thinking.” 

 

She places the waffle box on the kitchen island then walks to her cabinets where she pulls out a plate and two drinking glasses. Once everything is set out she pats her hand against Smokey’s back.

 

“Okay big boy, you got your ride for today.” She does a squat and as her hands lose tension Smokey squirms around before leaping out of her hands. “Thank you.” 

 

She washes her hands before preparing her waffles, pouring orange juice and water out for herself. From the fridge’s water, she fills a large pitcher which she empties into Smokey’s water bowl. Next to the fridge in a large food crate, she scoops two cups of food and pours it into his food bowl. His dull nails scrape and clack against the hardwood floor, his head diving into the food and water. 

 

“Thank you for last night.” She pets his head as he eats, his focus on the food bestowed on him. 

 

Kara stands back up and starts her breakfast, pulling some blueberries from the fridge to sprinkle on top of her waffle. She sits in silence, minus the clang of Smokey’s collar hitting his metal bowl and eats her waffle while staring out the window. The sun has fully shown herself, breaching the tops of the buildings of National City. The apartment grows warm and Kara lets herself relax in the warmth, she has half a mind to not do anything today. To simply sit and curl up with Smokey as they binge a show or movie series. 

 

But only half a mind. The other half is trying to make the seconds go by faster and the minutes quicker until Lena texts her. Lena needed to clear a few things and Kara understood, running a hospital doesn’t give her free time. She’s happy enough with whatever time she can have with Lena. The call from the night before, hearing Lena’s voice and how it calmed Kara so quickly, replays in her head as she gets dressed. The soft breathes she thinks Lena wasn’t aware the phone’s microphone caught, the way her voice softened and warmed Kara. She can feel it all again as she pulls a shirt off the hanger and looks at herself in the mirror. 

 

Her outfit ends up being a white button-up shirt with red capri pants, a thin belt wrapped around her and the shirt tucked neatly inside. She picks a flat shoe with no laces and no show socks, her brown shoes match her brown belt and the leather of her brown watch. She tosses the clothes she slept in into the hamper that sits in the corner of her room. 

 

She unbuttons her shirt and pulls her arms out, letting it fall and hang from it’s tucked position around her waist. Kara bites her lip as she peels off the gauze bandage. The suction of tape to skin stings as she rips it off. The burn from three weeks ago has begun to heal, the dead skin peeling away fully and exposing soft new tissue that’s slowly growing. Kara’s prescribed antibacterial cream sits on her bathroom sink and she spreads it all around the wound, rubbing it in even though it still stings. The bandage finds a new home in the trash can as she shuffles through her medicine cabinet for the box of bandages. 

 

With one end in between her teeth, she uses her free hand to wrap the gauze all the way around the wound. She tucks the excess into the wrap and then tapes it securely in place. She pulls her shirt back up, with a stiff arm she gets her bandaged arm through the sleeve. The bandage makes her shirt tighter than normal on her arm so she unbuttons the cuffs of the shirt and rolls them up to her elbow, the edge of the bandage peeks through. 

 

Her quiet apartment changes in an instant as her phone chimes, the sound echoing throughout the tiny apartment. She practically runs to her bedside table, gripping her phone and pulling it away from the charger it is currently plugged into. The cord pulls from the outlet and Kara holds her phone with the now dangling charger. She unplugs it and sets the cord on her bedside table for later. 

 

With a swipe of her finger, she unlocks her phone and immediately clicks on Lena’s notification. 

 

_ Lena: Hey, just finished. Constellation Park alright for our off day? _

 

_ Kara: Absolutely, I’ll be there shortly. _

 

Kara slips her phone into her pocket after relocking it. She hustles around her apartment for a bit, looking for her keys until she finds them thrown onto the dining table across from her kitchen. Kara heads for the door until she hears a soft whimper from behind. She turns around and looks as Smokey’s head is lowered and his eyes look up at her. 

 

She shakes her head with a smile before going to the rack beside her door. The harness that hangs on the end with a connected leash is what she pulls off the rack. She kneels down and holds the head hole of the harness open. Smokey happily pads over to her, pushing his head through the hole and then standing still as Kara clips the harness. 

 

“Let’s just hope Lena likes dogs,” Kara rubs between his ears and stands up. She wraps the leash handle twice around her hand before leading Smokey out the door with her.

 

―

 

The Constellation Park of National City surrounded a man-made lake, with the fall weather the leaves of surrounding trees fall into the lake. The Eastern side of the park leads into the business district of National City, it also houses the National City Observatory for which the park gets its name. The West leads to a largely residential district and features an actual park for kids.

 

Lena leans against the metal railing that prevents people from going into the lake, her arms crossed as she shivers a bit from the cold. The long winter coat around her warms her barely. Her hair is loose so it provides some cover for her neck but the luscious faux fur on the neck of her jacket warms her more. She watches around the lake as little kids stick their arms through the fences, tossing bread at the ducks that come near them. Lena wants to shake her head and tell them bread can make them sick but they’re on the other side of the lake and she’s here. 

 

She constantly looks around for a familiar face, a part of her wishes Sam would just appear to ease her nerves. Another part of her wants to just see Kara, just to make sure she’s okay. After the call last night Lena got only two hours of sleep, her mind not letting her rest for long as she worried. Her hands settle into her coat’s pockets as she starts to walk around the perimeter of the lake. 

 

The small heel she has on these boots click against the concrete path as she walks and it’s a calming sound against the utter quietness of the lake. She walks for a bit, just listening to tap after tap but she pauses as the tapping starts getting faster and higher in pitch. She stops, thinking something was wrong with her shoes but the clicking continues and it sounds like metal against metal.

 

She turns around, trying to find the sound, and just as she does so she sees a streak of grey running towards her. She freezes for a second and that’s all the time the streak needs to try and weave through her legs, instead it clashing against her and not making it between her legs. Lena falls on her bum, a hard hit as her tailbone hits the concrete ground. 

 

The streak from before has settled a bit, he gets up from the impact but his entire body is still moving as his tail wags back and forth faster than a speeding bullet. When the dog sees Lena he slows his tail and body shaking, looking up at her and sniffing at her coat.

 

“Um, hello.” Lena puts a handout and the dog starts sniffing before a little tongue comes out and wipes her palm. She looks over his back to see the blue harness that wraps around his neck and back, under his front paws and down his chest. His leash dragging right behind him. “Are you a little lost?”

 

He goes from Lena’s hand back to sniffing her person, his wet nose makes the material of the coat damp. She starts to put her legs underneath her, the dog just nudging her repeatedly like he wants her to fall. 

 

“Oh my god.” A familiar voice comes from the direction where the dog had been running away from.

 

Lena looks up, a blonde with a bun and glasses comes jogging in there direction, and she nearly bursts into laughter. “Kara?” 

 

Kara’s immediately grabbing the dog’s trailing leash, tugging a bit to get his attention. He leaves Lena alone and walks directly to Kara’s feet before sitting down. 

 

“I am so sorry. He hasn’t been out in a while. I was trying to help someone with directions. His leash fell away from my hand but usually, he just sits and waits. I don’t know what got into him. I am so sorry. Are you hurt? He isn’t this rambunctious. I am so-” She stops talking when Lena puts a hand over her own.

 

“I’m okay. He’s okay. We’re all okay.” Lena chuckles at Kara’s ramble. 

 

Kara sighs. “Okay, good.” She smiles at Lena before looking down at the dog. “You were supposed to be on your best behavior.”

 

The dog just stares up at Kara with a wide smile and a tongue falling out of his mouth, panting heavily. Lena laughs and brushes off her clothing of slobber and dirt.

 

“Well, I didn’t know you had a man in your life.” Lena smiles as she bends down a bit to rub at the dog’s ears. “Mind introducing me?”

 

Kara’s smile is still plastered on her face and she has to shake her head a few times to get her mouth to work. “Oh, oh yeah. Yeah. Lena meet Smokey. Smokey meet Lena.” 

 

“I cannot believe this.” Lena laughs and starts to walk, Kara following right next to her with Smokey walking along the trail and sniffing everything he sees. 

 

“What?” Kara still has her smile as she asks the question.

 

“You naming your dog Smokey is so definitely you.” Lena motions to Smokey.

 

Kara looks at her with a dramatic expression of insult. “Okay but he looks like a Smokey!”

 

“Because he’s grey?” Lena smirks. 

 

Kara huffs a breath of exasperation. “Okay, what names did your pets have?” Kara looks at her pointedly.

 

Lena’s smile fades, her eyes going from Kara’s baby blues to the ground. “ I, um. I didn’t have any pets.” Kara’s look of confusion and sympathy makes her continue to stammer out words. “I mean, I wanted one. I asked for the usual, a pony, dogs, cats, the whole sha-bang. I even brought home a little bird that had hurt his wing one day, I begged Lillian to just let me keep it, I would feed it and make sure it didn’t poop on the furniture. Lillian told me no, that pets just make people lose focus, that pets were like kids who never learn to take care of themselves. She had one of the butlers throw the bird out. He actually tossed it out the front door.”

 

Kara still looks at her with a hint of sadness but Lena can’t find any more words to vomit out. “Lillian?”

 

Lena opens and closes her mouth a few times. “Oh, she’s my adoptive mother. She was nice at first, even though I could hear the arguments she had with Lionel through the walls, but she gave that up once Lex and I became friends. She always had to let me know Lex was better, always found a way to undermine my accomplishments. I think she wishes it was the 1800s again so she could just sell me off the highest bidder and be done with me.”

 

Kara’s eyes fall away from Lena’s face but Lena feels a soft hand reach out between them. Kara clasps Lena’s hand in her own. “I’m so sorry, Lena. No one deserves that.”

 

Lena didn’t know how to react, her first instinct was to tug her hand away, to get Kara’s hand away but the longer they stay connected the warmer Lena feels. “Thank you Kara but the past is the past. I’m actually thankful for her, it pushed me to work harder and she made me always work with all my effort. 110% she would say.” 

 

It feels like Kara got closer but Lena couldn’t tell, the thumb that is rubbing soothing circles on the back of her palm is making the outside blurry, her vision putting filters over everything to draw her attention to Kara. 

 

“Eliza,” Kara says out of the blue.

 

“Pardon?” Lena cocks her head to the side with confusion.

 

“Eliza. She was my Lillian. But not really? Oh god, that was a bad comparison. Not that I’m comparing my adoptive mom to yours. Okay, let me start over.” Kara shakes her head, her eyes going wide like she couldn’t believe her mouth kept talking. “Eliza is my adoptive mom. I moved in with her and Jeremiah and Alex at 13. After my parents-” There’s a pause and Kara’s eyes look to be processing a choice, “After my parents died in a house fire, Eliza and Jeremiah knew my cousin, Clark. Clark had already grown up and was in the middle of figuring out his life so he sent me to them. A part of me wishes Clark had kept me, had helped me but I don’t know who I would be today without Eliza and Alex.”

 

“Jeremiah?” Lena inquires.

 

“He worked with the army, went on a mission and never came back. K.I.A.” Kara nods her head. 

 

“I’m sorry.” Lena squeezes Kara’s hand in hopes of comfort and Kara lifts her head to look at Lena and they both smile their sad smiles. “I don’t want to bring it up but, the fire that killed your parents, was that what made last night so horrible.”

 

Kara simply nods her head. “Every time we lose one it’s hard. Last night was the anniversary of their death. Thirteen years and I still hate the 14th of October.” 

 

“Can I ask why you decided to become a firefighter even with your parents’ death?” Lena looks at Kara with compassion. 

 

Kara’s mouth grows into a smile. “Only if I can buy you a coffee because you look freezing.”

 

Lena laughs and nods her head, Kara takes them on a turn to a different path that Lena assumes leads to the small outlet mall on the North side of the park. They walk into the shop, Smokey one amongst many animals in the coffee shop. A busboy comes by to welcome them and asks Kara if he can give Smokey a treat and with Kara’s permission Smokey scoffs down a handful of soft treats.

 

Kara orders two hot chocolates and Lena’s jaw drops in false shock. “Ms. Danvers I do believe I was promised coffee.”

 

Kara chuckles as she pays, walking over to the side of the shop where they wait for their order. “I was going to get coffee but I don’t want you up on caffeine tonight. You probably didn’t get a lot of sleep last night and so hopefully tonight it will be easier. I’m sorry for calling so late.” 

 

Lena simply smiles and shakes her head with a roll of her eyes as Kara grabs the two cups once they’re set down. Lena doesn’t miss the wink Kara gets from the barista. 

 

“You are a real heartthrob.” Lena chuckles as she takes a sip of her hot chocolate as they leave the shop. 

 

“What?” Kara looks at her confused, not having any idea what Lena is talking about. 

 

Lena nods her head in the direction of Kara’s cup. Kara has to spin it once to see what Lena saw, the ten digits scrawled under her name with a smiley face. Kara looks surprised for a second before turning her cup back around and taking a sip. 

 

“She was kind of cute.” Lena comments. 

 

“Yeah, I guess.” Kara simply shrugs as they walk through the park again. 

 

Lena thinks for a second, maybe she read Kara wrong. “Oh, sorry, I didn’t mean to assume.” 

 

“Assume?” Kara looks confused again.

 

“That you liked girls.” Lena points out. 

 

Kara almost spits out the ship she was taking, “Oh, no! I do! Like girls, I mean. Yeah. I like girls.”

 

“Good to know,” Lena smirks and Kara smiles at her.

 

“Is it?” Kara asks plainly.

 

Lena teases her, “I don’t know, is it?”

 

Kara smiles at the playful comment and she switches her cup to the hand with a leash on the arm, putting her free hand between the two of them once more. The back of her knuckles’ brush with Kara’s hand and she smiles before clasping her hand again. Kara’s thumb goes back to rubbing soft circles on Lena’s hand. 

 

Deeper into the park, closer to the lake again Kara points out a kite a kid is flying looks like a firetruck. Lena simply laughs and points out another that looks like a stingray. Kara’s focus goes from the kites blowing in the wind to the clouds that float in the sky. Kara ushers them to a wide patch of grass where people have set up picnics or kids have begun playing small games of sports. Lena follows her to a dry spot on the grass, both of them sit on the grass and look up to the sky. Kara points out different shapes and figures in the sky. Lena doesn’t contribute, she’s content watching Kara describe scenes of a dog pushing a stroller or a rabbit cooking eggs. 

 

“What do you see?” Kara turns her head from the sky to Lena. 

 

Lena quickly glances away from Kara, she tries to tell herself she wasn’t staring at Kara, and looks to the sky. “Oh, um. Well, that one.” Lena points to a large cloud directly above them. “That looks like..” She tries, she really does but she’s never done this before and her mind doesn’t know what to say. “.. like a cloud?”

 

Kara bursts into laughter, startling smokey from his almost sleep. “No, seriously, Lena. What do you see?”

 

“I don’t know, Kara. I’ve never done this before. What am I supposed to see?” Lena looks at Kara with a personal resentment, disappointed in herself for the unnatural childhood that kept these activities from her. 

 

“You’ve never done this?” Lena shakes her head at Kara and it furthers Kara’s shock. “Okay, what about like don’t touch the lava?” 

 

Lena looks at her with pure confusion. “Is that another game?”

 

“Oh my god. You were deprived of the joys of childhood!” Kara puts a hand to her face dramatically. “What about patty cake?” Lena shakes her head. “Chopsticks?”

 

“The things you eat with? Why is that essential to childhood?” Lena asks.

 

Kara lets out a horrified gasp. “It’s a game! Okay, um, oh, oh. What about Tag and Hide and Seek?” When Lena nods her head Kara let’s out a sigh of relief. “So you know the basics. What about tetherball?”

 

Lena once again shakes her head with no recognition of the term. Kara looks personally offended and it makes Lena laugh but it also makes her sad, sad for not knowing these things Kara absolutely loves. 

 

“Okay chopsticks is first.” Kara turns to face Lena, crossing her legs. Lena mimics her position. Kara puts her hands out in fists then extends her pointer finger. “Goal of the game is to get your opponent to have five fingers extended, they can’t use that hand anymore. But say I don’t have my right hand.” Kara puts her right hand behind her back. “But I do have four or two fingers extended on my left hand.” She extends her middle, ring and pinky finger. “I can split them, but only with even numbers.” Kara brings out her right hand and taps it against her left hand, folding down two fingers on her left and extending two on the right.

 

“So the winner is whoever goes first.” Lena looks at her.

 

Kara shakes her head. “No. It’s whoever gets the opponent to lose both of their hands.”

 

“But mathematically the first person to go would go from one to three, making the other person have two which would grow to five. Then the other would have one hand with one finger. They hit the three extended finger making it four. The four then hits the one and game over.” Lena looks at Kara. 

 

“I can’t believe you just broke chopsticks.” Kara lowers her hands in disbelief. 

 

Lena brings her shoulders closer to her neck, an act of anxiety and defense as she feels she just ruined a game of Kara’s childhood. “I’m sorry. Lillian just always told me to play the odds.” 

 

Kara must see the sadness of Lena’s face because she reaches out to grab both of Lena’s hands. “It’s okay Lena I swear. I was just joking. How about something else then. Want to try the clouds again?” 

 

Lena nods her head and Kara turns back toward the lake, her head looking up to the clouds. When Lena turns she notices the previous distance between them has become nothing, their knees touching and hands over the other on the ground. Kara points to a cloud and describes a whale eating a cupcake. 

 

Lena looks up to a thin diagonal cloud with a thick blob at the top. “Look, it’s a firefighter climbing a ladder!”

 

Kara gasps with enthusiasm. “Yes!”

 

Lena points to another. “That’s a double helix strand!”

 

Kara’s less enthused with this one, “Oh yeah?”

 

“The double helix, the strands in our cells that hold our DNA,” Lena explains. 

 

Kara’s face lights up. “Oh, the thing from biology class!” 

 

Lena laughs. “Yes, the thing from biology class.” 

 

―

 

They leave around lunch, Kara complaining of her stomach growling. Kara takes her back to her apartment for lunch, promising a cooked meal. Lena sits on Kara’s couch, her jacket is resting on the coat rack by Kara’s door. Her tights hug her legs and her red blouse is loose around her as she sits on Kara’s couch with her shoes on the floor. 

 

Kara whistles a soft tune from the kitchen as she pads around from pot to bowl to pan. Lena looks over her shoulder to watch Kara pour one item into another pot. She stretches her hand out to the side of the couch she hasn’t sprawled out on, where Smokey has laid down with his head on Lena’s lap. His soft breathes are warm as he presses his snout into her hand. 

 

“I found him during a fire one day. Him and the rest of his litter. No mom in sight. I checked the building for her but she wasn’t there. I always wondered what had happened to her.” Kara finally pulls out two plates from her cabinets as she wildly swings her hand over the steam rising from one pot. 

 

“So not only is his fur grey but you found him in a fire and named him Smokey.” Lena chuckles lightly.

 

“It was just a name for while they were at the station. We were going to send them to the shelter but they were full so we decided to just have a little puppy yard sale. Clark brought some old leashes and stuff of Krypto’s to also go with the dogs.” Kara pours out fresh noodles from the pot, half of them on one plate and the other half on another. 

 

“Was it the story of no one picking Smokey so you took him in?” Lena looks to Smokey, scratching at his fur.

 

Kara chuckles. “No, actually. He had snuck out of the little box we had his siblings in. Little booger got in Lucy’s backpack. We got all the others into nice homes with kids and young adults, one to an old guy. We were about to leave, go home, but this lil yap came from Lucy’s bag.”

 

“So you took him in?” Lena asks and Kara just nods as she pours out a sauce from another pan. “He’s such a softie.” 

 

“You think that now, at night he’ll chew your face off.” Kara mimics a claw with one hand as she pulls utensils out from a drawer in the kitchen island. 

 

Lena presses her hands against his face. “I don’t think so.”

 

“No, he wouldn’t. Attack dogs can’t be therapy dogs.” Kara walks from the kitchen with both plates in hand. 

 

Lena looks at her with a bit of confusion. “He’s your therapy dog?”

 

Kara shakes her head. “Not mine. He’s a registered hospital therapy dog. Though I don’t have as much time to take him as I used to.” Kara sets one plate in front of Lena and then finds a seat in the armchair next to the couch. 

 

“I always wanted a therapy dog at Luthor Memorial, I thought it would help the kids and parents in the children’s ward. Lillian didn’t want to pay for someone to bring them in and she, of course, had her stance on pets.” Lena puts her feet back on the ground, leans forward and pulls the plate to herself. 

 

“How much does it cost?” Kara stops eating for only a moment, her interest piqued. 

 

Lena looks up in thought, trying to recall the price. “It’s a few thousand dollars mainly for insurance. Then the amount whichever organization or person deems is their hourly pay.” 

 

Kara nods her head, “So what if you only had to pay for insurance?” 

 

Lena laughs, having to cover her mouth with the back of her hand to cover a cough that comes after. “Therapy dogs aren’t cheap, I don’t think someone would just be happy to take time out of their day to walk a dog around even though it helps people.” 

 

“I would,” Kara says once Lena goes back to eating. 

  
Lena looks up from her plate. “Kara, I can’t ask that of you. You already have so much to do.”

 

“I won’t take extra time off, just on days or times when I’m not on shift.” Kara looks at her expectantly.

 

Lena shakes her head. “Why?”

 

Kara’s shoulders shrug and she goes back to looking at her food. “Not doing anything else. Maybe also I can see you some more and help at the hospital the way you are trying to help the fire station.” 

 

Lena smiles and then nods her head. “Thank you, Kara. Whenever you’re available you can come by the hospital and I can get you settled.”

 

“I can come by tomorrow after my shift.” Kara puts her nearly empty plate on the table. 

 

“It doesn’t have to be right away.” Lena laughs.

 

Kara shrugs. “No, but if I can help I want to do it as quickly as possible.” 

 

“Ever the hero,” Lena smirks, then she becomes confused as Kara’s playfulness dims and her face goes from a smile to a hard head shake.

 

“I’m no hero.” Kara pulls her feet onto the chair, sitting cross-legged. 

 

Lena looks on with confusion. Kara risks her life every day for the safety of others. She wants to protest, how Kara protects others, but she remembers last night and how the girl wasn’t supposed to be there. She simply nods her head and lets Kara grab the remote.

 

“Want to watch a movie?” Kara says as she opens Netflix. 


	5. i could get used to this heat on my skin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She stops one time to sit down on a bench next to a girl waiting. Smokey leaps onto the bench in between the girl and Kara and Kara begins to lightly pet Smokey, smiling at the girl as she does. The girl reaches her hand out lightly and starts to pat Smokey’s back.
> 
> “Like this.” Kara chuckles and puts her hand over the girl’s and shows her how to slowly stroke Smokey’s fur.
> 
> She pulls her hand away and the girl starts to rub at his head, causing Smokey’s attention to turn to the girl. He nuzzles his nose into her neck and the little girl chuckles. Kara smiles happily.
> 
> From the room across from where they sit a woman shouts out and the little girl pushes herself off the bench. Before she goes into the room the girl turns back, waves to Kara and then rushes into the room. Kara chuckles and then stands, taking her things with her as she continues down the halls of Luthor Memorial.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so some shit has happened. My primary blog @canaries has been suspended for "hoarding urls" so I'm currently active at [@charlotewells](http://charlotewells.tumblr.com). I have delayed this chapter as long as possible hoping it would get fixed and reactivated but it looks like that is just not in the cards. I didn't want to keep you all waiting any longer so here you are. 
> 
> Other note: I have no clue how human resources works.
> 
> Other, other note: chapter 6 will be up on patreon tomorrow! so go check that out if you want (NoxWrites is the patreon account).

Kara’s laying on the cushions of the fire station’s common area couch. Her legs hang over the arm of the couch and one hand is draped over her eyes. The noise of the common area makes her shut her eyes as if ignoring them would make time go faster. 

 

“What’s her problem?” She hears James’ voice above everyone.

 

Lucy’s voice is the answering one, “She’s bored. She was going to go see Lena but has to wait.”

 

“Who is she waiting for?” Clark asks next.

 

“Alex, she’s getting food for everyone and Kara talked her into getting a meal for Lena.” Lucy uses the teasing tone of children talking about crushes to accentuate Lena’s name.

 

“It’s not for Lena!” Kara grumbles from under her arm.

 

“Oh yeah?” Kara feels a tin foil ball hit her chin. “Then who is it for, Smokey?” 

 

Kara hears the grey dog’s tags jingle as the metal hits each other. She turns her head and lifts her arm, his tail wagging at the mention of his name and his head perked in attention.

 

“Maybe!” Kara shouts and Smokey turns his head to her with a lazy exposed tongue. Kara grumbles and puts her arm back over her eyes. 

 

“Someone’s in a mood.” Lucy laughs and the room goes back to quiet mumbles as Kara waits for Alex. 

 

She clicks her tongue and Smokey comes over with a wagging tail. She twists so her top half is turned to face Smokey while her legs still dangle over the arm of the couch. Smokey lifts his head up to Kara’s hand, meeting her half way. 

 

She watches from the corner of her vision as Clark walks around Smokey and sits on the other end of the couch, near Kara’s head. She looks from Smokey to him and then starts twisting so she can sit upward. 

 

“How are you? I was worried about you on Saturday, you didn’t call or text anyone. Even Alex.” Clark pats his lap and Smokey takes the cue to leap onto the couch.

 

“I was bad. But I’m better. I think the two days J’onn forced me to take really helped.” Kara lifts her legs off the ground and sits cross-legged on the couch.

 

Clark nods his head, scratching at Smokey’s ears. “I hear Lena also helped.”

 

Kara smiles, her eyes closing as she thinks of her Saturday with Lena. “Yeah we spent the whole day together. She even helped get Smokey when my grip slipped and he darted off. Dinner was awesome as well, she came over and we-” Her eyes open and she turns her attention to Clark who is wearing a grin ear to ear. “I only told Alex- Oh she’s gonna get it.”

 

Clark starts to chuckle. “Alex didn’t tell anyone anything. I made an assumption, you confirmed it. I didn’t realize it was the whole day though.” 

 

Kara opens and closes her mouth before just pouting and turning away from Clark. “Whatever.”

 

Clark’s hand goes to Kara’s shoulder. “I didn’t mean to make you feel bad. I was teasing. I am happy you found someone.”

 

Kara immediately turns back to Clark. “No, no. Um, she’s great. I mean she’s awesome, she’s a doctor so of course she’s amazing. Like eight years or more in college. But no, we’re not like dating. I just mean, we’re just friends.” 

 

Clark nods his head. “I was once friends with Lois.”

 

Kara looks to Clark with confusion, a disagreement on the tip of her tongue, but her head turns back to the main doors as they open wildly. Alex walks through with four bags in her hand.

 

“Okay so I got everyone’s lunch and Kara’s mystery lunch. Kara your lunches are in this one.” Alex puts all of the bags on the counter but pulls at one, separating it from the rest. 

 

Kara leaps from the couch, Smokey pulling away from Clark to follow his owner. She walks over to the kitchen area and gives Alex a kiss on the cheek with a whispered thanks as she takes her bag. Alex waves a hand as Kara leaves the kitchen. Kara pats her thigh with her free hand and Smokey pads up to her, following her through the doors and into the garage outside of the station. 

 

Kara holds the door open for Smokey to get into the passenger seat of the Ford Raptor. He settles into the seat as Kara walks around to the driver side. The food goes on the floor of the passenger seat as Kara leaves the station for the day. It doesn’t take her long to head to the Luthor Memorial hospital. She parks in the garage across the street and holds Smokey still as she connects his leash to his harness. The dog leaps from the passenger seat when Kara steps aside, she reaches back and grabs the food bag, switching it from the white bag to an insulated cooler. 

 

With the cooler slung over her shoulder, Kara makes to the front entrance of the hospital. It take the security guard a moment to allow Smokey to enter, name dropping Lena seems to calm him down. She makes it to the front desk, a nurse goes from the back wall of cabinets to the front in order to help Kara.

 

“Can I help you?” She’s still looking at charts as she asks Kara.

 

“Lena Luthor said an appointment for Kara Danvers is ready. For Human Resource Director.” Kara tightened her grip on the leash a bit, Smokey just sits still and awaits her command with a wagging tail.

 

The woman looks at her with a hint of doubt as she sits by a computer to the side. Kara looks down as the nurse types away on the computer. She looks around the front area, looking at delivery personnel enter and leave books and notes on the desk. Some people walk right past the desk and to the elevators behind them. 

 

“Okay, Miss Danvers your appointment is in ten minutes. You can take the elevator to the seventh floor where our HR department resides.” The nurse motions to the elevators behind the desk that Kara had just seen. 

 

“Thank you.” Kara nods her head and tugs at the leash, Smokey following at her heels. 

 

The Director’s office is easy to find, the cubicles are all set aside while the Director’s office is built into the wall with windows all around. Kara keeps Smokey close as she walks over to the office. The eyes of workers follow her, more specifically Smokey, as she passes them. Smokey stays attentive to what’s in front, not glancing away from the path in front of him. Kara knocks gently on the door, the force light enough that it opens the already partially open door further.

 

“Come in.”

 

Two walls are covered in windows, one facing outside and the other faces the cubicles. The other two are simple, boring staccato walls. The Director looks up at Kara from the stack of papers she is sifting through.

 

“Miss Danvers, I presume.” She points to a wooden chair against the wall. “Let me go grab the forms.”

 

She immediately stands and leaves Kara in the room alone. Kara sits in the room with a bouncing leg. The hospital chairs force her body to sit up straight with anxiety. The leash that’s wrapped around her wrist falls limp with no tension as Smokey lays on the floor with closed eyes. He settled there when Kara sat down at the request of the Human Resource Director. 

 

Her head falls against the staccato wall behind her, boredom filling her mind as she waits. Her foot bounces and scrapes the side of Smokey’s fur, earning her a deep growl of discontent.

 

“Sorry.” She whispers, leaning down to rub at the fur her foot displaced and Smokey settles back down. 

 

As she sits back up the door opens and in walks a tall woman with dark heels, a dark suit with a red undershirt. Her hands are filled with a pile of papers. She sits behind the desk that Kara’s been seated in front of, setting the pile in between the two of them. 

 

“Well,” The woman sits back, her hands settle into a pointed triangle in her lap. “Smokey’s credentials all have been verified. There are a few forms you need to sign and fill out in order to work at Luthor Memorial. If I understand correctly, your advocate was Doctor Luthor.” 

 

“Lena Luthor.” Kara corrects before she can even think of stopping herself. 

 

The director raises a brow in confusion, “Right. So as I was saying, fill out the forms and return them as soon as possible. Once they get processed you can start.” 

 

Kara nods and leans forward and listens as the director pulls forms from the pile, handing them over to Kara. Each time she’s handed a new form she slips it into her lap. The woman ends after she flips through a few of the papers and deems all of the files to be correct. 

 

“Well, that settles it. If you have any questions I’m sure  _ Doctor _ Luthor,” The woman emphasizes Lena’s title before continuing, “will be able to help. If you can get them back to me before the weekend they’ll be processed before Saturday. Then you and Smokey can start as soon as next Monday. Good Day, Miss Danvers.”

 

“Um,” Kara stands to reach out and shakes the director’s hand. “Thank you ma’am.” 

 

She holds the files in one hand, the leash handle falls down to her elbow as she keeps the files close to her chest. Her other hand reaches down to grab a white paper bag. She has to put the food on top of the pile of files in order to open the door. Smokey happily walks through the door with a wagging tail as he pushes into the hospital hallways. Kara exchanges the food bag back to her free hand. 

 

Smokey leads them through the halls while Kara’s distracted looking through every passing hallway or open door. She has to stop a few times as patients and doctors stop to pet him. Kara lets each one pet him until their content, a few ask questions that Kara’s more than willing to answer. 

 

She stops one time to sit down on a bench next to a girl waiting. Smokey leaps onto the bench in between the girl and Kara and Kara begins to lightly pet Smokey, smiling at the girl as she does. The girl reaches her hand out lightly and starts to pat Smokey’s back.

 

“Like this.” Kara chuckles and puts her hand over the girl’s and shows her how to slowly stroke Smokey’s fur.

 

She pulls her hand away and the girl starts to rub at his head, causing Smokey’s attention to turn to the girl. He nuzzles his nose into her neck and the little girl chuckles. Kara smiles happily.

 

From the room across from where they sit a woman shouts out and the little girl pushes herself off the bench. Before she goes into the room the girl turns back, waves to Kara and then rushes into the room. Kara chuckles and then stands, taking her things with her as she continues down the halls of Luthor Memorial. 

 

—

 

Lena sits in the staff room with a cup of ice cold water in her hands. She watches as the interns and doctors rush in and out, some take the time to sit down and they pull their pagers out of their coat pockets before sliding them on the table, signalling the start of their break. Lena stands and finishes the cup with a large gulp before tossing it into the small waste bin next to a jug of water. She’s back outside and into the thick of the hospital again. The raging noise and heat of the hospital compared to the peace and quiet of the break room is a startling difference that previously took Lena a while to adjust to the transition. 

 

She puts her hands in her coat pockets as she strolls through the ninth floor of Luthor Memorial. The pediatric ward is much quieter than other floors, the worry and pain of parents being loud enough to make one have a headache. Lena walks past open doors with two to three beds, one to two families in at a time. While she wraps around the rooms she comes to the large kids room where toys and books and games are scattered everywhere. Kids are sitting with nurses or their parents, one nurse leading a reading session to a group. 

 

Lena smiles as she passes, a handful of the kids notice her and give her a big wave with their full smiles. The brightness of kids never diminishes despite the odds, Lena thinks that’s the worse part of working with kids. 

 

She throws the thought away, making her rounds through rooms that she has memorized. One young boy with a broken rib that pierced his lung, another with a heart condition that makes him a typical resident of hers. One young girl with a leg four inches shorter than another, a girl with heart palpitations. She has each one memorized, each one stored away in a shelf in her mind with decorations on their mental folders of the kids personality. 

 

She’s in the middle of speaking to one of her regulars, a young boy with a lung smaller than the other, when a nurse appears from the door with a soft knock. The parents ignore her, letting Lena leave as she excuses herself. 

 

“Yes?” Lena looks from the nurse to the boy. 

 

“Sorry, Doctor Arias said she needs to speak with you.” The nurse waits for Lena’s response, her focus also on the child. 

 

Lena opens her mouth for a moment, thinking her response over. “Okay. I’ll meet her right away. Could you get Mister Wagers here a new respiratory scan? His last one was eight months ago, I want to a timeline comparison.”

 

“Yes, Miss Luthor.” The nurse enters the room as Lena leaves. 

 

Lena pulls her pager from her pocket, double checking that she wasn’t needed anywhere. She slips it back into her pocket before rolling her eyes and entering the elevator. She reaches the seventh floor and cuts from the Human Resource Department to the offices across on the same floor. Lena opens the door and knocks lightly as she sees Sam in her chair, on her cellphone, with a grin. 

 

Sam spins instantly in the chair, waving silently to Lena before pointing to the chairs in front of her desk. Lena nods her head and seats herself in one of two leather chairs across from Sam. 

 

“Yeah, okay. Mhmm.” Sam gives Lena another small wave. 

 

“Okay. Okay. I have to go, I’m meeting with Lena. No, not like that.” Lena’s brows perk in interest. 

 

“Okay. You too. Yes I’ll remember. Okay. Bye.” Sam ends the call and slips her phone into her purse beneath her desk. 

 

“What are we meeting about that is ‘not like that?’” Lena gives air quotes. 

 

“Luce is just teasing.” Sam shakes her head, trying to brush it off. 

 

“Luce?” Lena looks at Sam with curiosity. 

 

Sam looks like she let a secret slip, “Yeah. Lucy. Kara’s friend.”

 

“I know who Lucy is, I have deductive reasoning. I was just surprised by the nickname. I don’t even have a nickname.” Lena feigns hurt. 

 

Sam rolls her eyes. “Yes you do, it’s asshole. Occasionally, bitch.”

 

Lena chuckles before leaning back in the chair and looking out of Sam’s windows. “So what is this meeting about?”

 

“How was your date with Kara?” Sam’s smile turns devilish. 

 

“I cannot believe you.” Lena scoffs. “I was meeting with Anthony Wagers and I thought this was an emergency.”

 

“It’s a social emergency! Also, how is he? Lung deformity right?” Sam’s joking manner dissipates into genuine sincerity. 

 

“Yeah. He’s doing great. His parents, not so much. They’re so worried because he still wants to play soccer. The inhaler apparently has stopped helping. I’m having Robin run another respiratory exam. God you should see this kid run though. Apparently the fastest in his class.” Lena puts her head in her hands in frustration. 

 

Sam stands from her desk and walks over to Lena, sitting in the second leather chair and putting an arm around Lena. “I can call Queen Consolidated, ask about a printed lung transplant.” 

 

“Oh Sam that would be phenomenal.” Lena’s attitude rises with hope. “I just have to find a way to sneak the transplant cost into the hospital’s budget.”

 

Sam puts her fingers in her ears. “La La La, I’m not listening. I’m not going to be responsible for aiding and abetting a criminal.” 

 

Lena smacks Sam lightly in the arm and the two let out a long breath. 

 

“Okay so Kara.” Sam dives right back into it. 

 

Lena rolls her eyes and leans against the back of the chair, “It wasn’t a date!”

 

“Oh yeah. Lena Luthor magically took her first vacation day in her entire career, moved around seven hospital procedures and two appointments all for a friend.” Sam looks at her with incredulity. 

 

“God, shut up.” Lena laughs lightly and Sam cracks a small smile. 

 

“Fine. Whatever. It’s not like Kara’s in this building at this moment because you wanted something and she was more than happy to do it.” Sam lets out a sigh.

 

“She’s what?” Lena turns to Sam with wide eyes, Sam’s facade of sass drops and she has a devilish grin again. 

 

“Everyone’s bustling about the well behaved pitbull roaming the seventh floor. What gave you the idea society’s most hated breed would be a good–“ Sam trails off as Lena has already stood from the chair and left her office. “–idea.” She huffs. “Last time I do anything for her.”

 

—

 

Kara’s about to make her way through one of the last halls, heading to the elevator when a soft familiar voice shouts at her. “Kara?” 

 

She turns around to see Lena with a cocked head and an inquisitive look on her face. Kara immediately beams with a smile, the two approach and as Kara is about to hug her she realizes her predicament. Lena covers her mouth with her hand to stifle a chuckle. Kara laughs and shrugs her shoulder.

 

“What a surprise! How are you?” Lena leads Kara through a hallway that widens enough to put a half circle desk against one end. 

 

“I’m good, a lot better thanks to our day together.” Kara smiles at Lena as Lena stores a binder away on the desk. “Oh! And here’s a gift for you.” Kara hands the insulated bag to Lena. 

 

“Is this the..” Lena opens the bag and breathes in, her face grows bright with a smile, “ravioli with organic parmesan!” 

 

Kara smiles and nods as she leans against the hospital’s desk. Smokey settles between the two of them with silence. Lena looks over her bag and gives Smokey a smile before looking back to Kara, zipping her lunch in the bag tightly.

 

“What are you doing here?” Lena sets the lunch on the other side of the desk. 

 

“I came to get the papers so Smokey can get all set up and help out here. I told Lucy also and she said she’s willing to bring Smokey on days I can’t.” Kara sets the papers onto the desk and pats it, the solidity of the stack makes it louder than she intends. 

 

“That’s amazing. Kara, I truly can’t thank you enough.” Lena puts a hand over Kara’s, rubbing her thumb over the back of Kara’s palm. 

 

Kara smiles and she gets lost in Lena’s eyes and they stay there for a moment. Kara wants to spend the day with Lena, stay and help her if she can and if she can’t she wants to learn about Lena. She knows how Lena behaves around her while being professional but she wants to see every side of Lena. 

 

“Is this the illustrious Kara Danvers?”

 

Kara turns away from Lena’s eyes, her head turns first but her eyes strain to stay on Lena’s image as long as possible. She turns to see an asian woman with a great big smirk on her face, her clothes distinguishably different than doctors. Kara smiles a bit with confusion.

 

“I am, but I’m afraid I don’t know your name.” Kara wants to extend a hand but she’s hesitant to move from the warmth of Lena’s hand. 

 

“Jessica.” She extends her hand and Kara is then forced to move her hand. They shake and Jessica smiles as she pulls away. 

 

“A pleasure to meet you Jessica. Are you a nurse here?” Kara looks at Lena and Jessica multiple times.

 

Lena cuts in before Jessica can respond, “Jessica is our head nurse and one of my great friends.”

 

“And I have heard all about you.” Jessica smiles and then turns to the papers in front of her. 

 

“All good things I hope?” Kara looks a bit uncomfortable and lets out a forced laugh. 

 

Jessica nods her head with a smile, “Of course. I don’t think Lena would just gush about anyone.”

 

“I do not gush.” Lena interrupts with a look of shock. “Jessica was the nurse who covered for me after I left. So of course she knows about you.” 

 

“Oh,” Kara draws out the sound of the word in disbelief.

 

Lena nudges Kara forward, “And now let’s go to my office. Jessica, I’ll be taking a lunch break.” 

 

Kara doesn’t see the glare Lena throws at Jessica but if the sound of Jessica laughing is anything to go on Lena gave her a dirty look. Kara pulls Smokey along, making sure to keep the files together as Lena leads her through the halls. Lena is stopped by multiple nurses asking questions on charts and patients and Lena deals with them all professionally and with the utmost sincerity. 

 

Lena goes back to Kara and her hand settles on Kara’s lower back, Kara jolts for a second at the unusual touch but with Lena it seems natural. Her back settles and the tension rolls away from her entire body. Kara continues to follow Lena.

 

They go to the elevator and up three floors to the tenth before getting off. The floor is no longer white staccato and poorly made chairs but wood and leather bound seats. Lena leads Kara to one office that has a door with two windows on either side of it. The door has a thin handle that Lena holds open for Kara and Smokey. Kara stops a few feet inside as she takes in the office, the incredibly dull and lifeless office. Lena goes and clicks a button near the door and the curtains for the windows facing into the building begin to unfurl downward. 

 

“This is,” Kara swallows, “nice.”

 

Lena sits behind Kara at the office and sets the food bag from before on her desk. “No it’s not. You can unleash Smokey.”

 

Kara bends down and unhooks Smokey’s leash from his harness before going over to the desk and sitting down. He sits down where Kara left him by the door and then rolls a bit on the soft carpeted floor. Kara rolls the leash up as she settles into a chair parallel to Lena. 

 

“I really can’t thank you enough for bringing Smokey and actually getting him registered.” Lena’s bright smile brings a brighter one to Kara’s face. 

 

“Honestly, anything I can do with you is worth it.” Kara smiles then realizes her phrasing and her brain back pedals. “I mean, for you. To help you. With the hospital. Not like do you. Oh that sounds so much worse.”

 

Lena lets out a cute chuckle that makes Kara stop her word marathon, her words fall silent and her open mouth turns to a smile once more. 

 

“Also, don’t worry about what Jess said, she’s a gossip.” Lena waves her hand at her door as if Jessica was there. 

 

Kara laughs and nods her head, “Well there has to have been something said for there to be gossip.” 

 

Lena’s cheeks go red, unnoticed by Kara who’s looking at the floor with a smile. “But don’t worry. I talk about you too. At the station, I mean. Not like to myself.” 

 

Lena has to keep herself from laughing at Kara again, she lets her continue her word vomit. “The station actually really liked you at The Hose. You should come another time. Oh! Maybe karaoke night! If not that’s totally understandable. Maybe I could show you the station some time. You could get a tour by a real firefighter. Well, I guess I don’t have to give you the tour, if you want anyone can give you the tour. I just meant me because we know each other. Well, you know the others now also.”

 

Kara hadn’t noticed Lena getting up and sitting next to her on the other chair, her rambling making her delve deeper into her own thoughts. The warmth that floods her hand makes her stop, she looks to see Lena holding her hand with a smile. 

 

“I would love to see the station in a tour,” Lena specifies, “led by you.” 

 

Kara beams. “Fantastic!”

 

“But I do have a request in exchange.” Lena gives her a smirk, a mischievous glint in her eye. 

 

“Anything!” Kara looks on without a worry at the change in attitude. 

 

“There’s this annual banquet that I, sadly, am obligated to attend. Each person, as tradition, is required to bring a date. So my question is, would you like to go the 79th Annual Medical Inquiry banquet with me?” Lena’s mischievous front falls to reveal an unsure gleam of hope. 

 

Kara opens her mouth and closes it. Opens and closes. She puts a finger to her lips and thinks for a moment before responding. “Lena, I would absolutely love to be your date,” Kara pauses, for whatever reason, Kara pauses. “for the banquet. Your date for the banquet. But are you sure you want me? I don’t know what all thirty of the forks are used for, I’ve only ever eaten a meal with one.”

 

Lena’s unsure hope turns into a bubbling purity as she sees Kara, nervous, before her. “I would want no one else.” She lowers her voice and leans closer to Kara. “Besides, we only use one fork as well.” 

 

Lena stands from the chair and walks over to her desk, pulling the insulated bag in front of her. As she goes to pull the food out her door opens furiously; nearly smacking Smokey but he moves out of the way, leaping to Kara. In the door frame stands a furious Lillian, her hair up in a perfect bun as always, her outfit more expensive than Lena’s apartment, and her eyes are daggers. 

 

“What is this I am hearing about some mutt wondering around the seventh floor with—“ Lillian’s eyes go from Lena to the bag to the food being pulled from the bag to Kara’s shocked expression to the dog now sitting in Kara’s lap. “What is going on?”

 

Kara quickly attaches Smokey’s leash to his harness before standing, the dog leaping off her lap at the movement. “Hi, Misses Luthor, I’m Kara Danvers it’s a pleasure to meet you. This is Smokey, he’s a registered hospital dog.” 

 

Kara’s hand stays out for an awkward amount of time as Lillian doesn’t regard her, her focus entirely on Lena. “Explain.”

 

Lena sets the fold back into the bag. “Kara, I’ll call you later. I’m really sorry.”

 

Kara simply nods her head and then lowers it, her eyes not meeting Lillian’s glare. When Kara leaves, closing the door behind her, Lillian charges forward to directly in front of Lena’s desk. 

 

“We do not allow dogs in this hospital. You of all people should know that. And who was that woman? Was that the girl that all my nurses and doctors seem to be convinced you are attracted to? Lena Kieran Luthor, explain this now.” Lillian’s hands press into Lena’s desk. 

 

Lena slips down into her office chair, a hand going to rub her temples. “Hospital dogs have been known to improve hospital morale not just for patients and families but for nurses and doctors. It would be barely anything out of the annual income of the hospital. It would be like a missing sprinkle on a sprinkle ice cream cone. You wouldn’t notice a change.”

 

Lillian growls. “I don’t care. I will not have that mutt–“

 

“Smokey is fully registered to work in a hospital and a pure breed pitbull.” Lena doesn’t even open her eyes, just continues to rub her temples out of frustration. 

 

“Do not interrupt me.” Lillian hisses once Lena finishes. “Tell her no.”

 

“I’ll think about it.” Lena remarks. 

 

“You infuriating–“

 

“Is there anything else, Misses Luthor?” Lena finally opens her eyes, annoyance lacing her tone.

 

Lillian is about to bite, Lena can see it in the way her throat tightens and her jaw clenches. Shockingly the pain never comes. Her mother breathes a few times and then brushes her outfit with her hands, as if the entire topic dirtied her perfect attire. 

 

“The Medical Inquiry’s banquet is this Saturday. Find a date. Jack will be unable to babysit you as he has a girlfriend now. He better be presentable.” Lillian turns and Lena calms, a whole conversation without a bite, a part of her is shocked. “Could your poor little firefighter not afford her own equipment? Is that why you pushed the benefit? Little blondie couldn’t pay for a new oxygen tank?” 

 

The door closes with a slam and Lena’s hands have found a scotch tumbler before she can think. The shattering noise makes her head sting as the glass impacts with the door. She’s alone for a while until the door opens once more. Lena takes a deep breath before her jaw clenches.

 

“What, have you decided to further harm your only daughter?” Lena rubs her hand on her temples again. 

 

“Well, I wanted to ask why I saw Kara leaving with a sad look on her face but I feel like that answers my question.” Sam’s voice is music to Lena’s ears, the delightful noise makes her sigh with relief. 

 

“I’m sorry, Sam.” Lena moves her hand away and looks as Sam sits down in the leather chairs. 

 

“It’s completely okay. So, Lillian found out about Kara?” Sam pulls her hair back behind her head and ties it up. “You okay?”

 

“Yeah, I’m fine. Lillian will learn to live with it, I don’t care anymore.” Lena leans back in her chair.

 

“In better news, guess who is going to the Medical Inquiry banquet?” Sam smiles and leans forward with excitement. 

 

“You’re way to excited so you probably asked Lucy and she said yes?” Lena smiles as her encounter with her mother falls away. 

 

Sam’s smile grows. “She didn’t want to, she thought it was going to be too fancy but I talked her into it.”

 

“So did Kara.” Lena slips as she opens the insulated bag once again, finally getting the food out and opening the ravioli.

 

“You asked Kara?” Sam looks on with excitement. 

 

Lena nods her head and grabs the plastic utensils from inside the bag. Sam’s smile turns into a smirk as she laughs with a head shake. 

 

“Well now I owe Lucy twenty bucks.” Sam throws her hands up in false aggravation. 

 

“When will you stop betting me on my life?” Lena chuckles lightly.

 

Sam pulls the chair closer to Lena’s desk, leaning forward and picking pieces of Lena’s meal to eat. “When it stops being so interesting.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fun fact the lung being smaller than another, and heart palpitations are my own conditions lmao. the leg shorter than the other one is a condition my friend still has to this day.
> 
> thank you all for reading and please comment, kudos or come scream about it in my ask box over [@charlotewells](http://charlotewells.tumblr.com).


	6. the head is too wise. the heart is all fire.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Oh, yeah I’m fine. What is troubling you though? Why did you call?” Alex responds and it makes Kara look past her potted plant to where Lucy and Sam are still talking, still distracted.
> 
> “I’m so fucked, Alex. Her hands are so warm and nice, and god, she’s just so beautiful. I couldn’t believe it when I first saw her, I still can’t believe it. And she’s up for not one, but two awards! Two awards that have never been won by the same people! Ever! Do you hear how amazing she is?” Kara takes a breath after word vomiting about Lena.
> 
> “You got it bad,” Alex responds and Kara can do nothing but nod in agreement.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My blog is still suspended so I'm still chilling at [sorcerress](http://sorcerress.tumblr.com). I really hope you guys enjoy this chapter! It's by far one of my favorite things I've written.
> 
> Chapter 7 will be up on Patreon by the end of the week!

She paces back and forth in her bedroom with a hand on her chin and dresses thrown about the bed and floor. She has multiple pairs of heels on the floor with each dress, matching in colors or in style. Her eyes fly from one pair to another and she switches them before shaking her head in disagreement with her decision. 

 

She leaps when her phone rings. Her mind elsewhere as she tries to remember where she actually put that infernal device. She listens again as the ringtone echoes in her apartment and she drops to the floor, grabbing the phone that had slid half an arm’s length beneath her bed. She answers it before checking the contact name, the ringtone distinct in who is calling. 

 

“Lucy, I need help.” Kara sighs as she stays on the floor. 

 

Kara hears a laugh on the other end of the line. “How did I know?” Kara knows Lucy is rolling her eyes. “Okay, what are your decisions?”

 

“Okay I was thinking the teal with the black accent that I wore to the CatCo gala once.”

 

“Nope, too informal. Also you need so show off for Lena.” Lucy’s smirk is clear in her words. 

 

“What? Why?” Kara immediately scurries to her feet, confused and pressed for time. 

 

“Oh my god. Kara you are the only one who can’t see it.” Lucy lets out an exasperated sigh. 

 

Kara stands with a furrowed brow and her free hand on her hip as she thinks. “I don’t get it.”

 

“Yes, I know. It doesn’t matter now. Do you have anything more formal?” Lucy sounds a little frustrated as she asks so Kara takes a bit to think through her closet, to pick the best one she thinks would suit Lucy’s requirements. 

 

She slots the phone between her shoulder and ear, tilting her head to hold it against her, in order to rummage through her closet a bit more. She goes back and forth through the hanging outfits. Her hands stop at one, a black dress that wraps around the neck with no back. It crosses over her chest to make and X of the fabric, a halter dress that reaches the floor. She remembers trying it on, the fabric hugging her as she turned around. 

 

“I have that one dress I was going to wear to the Golden Axe last year but then we got that call for downtown.” Kara pulls it from her closet when she hears Lucy gasp in excitement. 

 

“Yes that one is so good! It has the open back right?” Lucy’s tone turns happier as Kara listens. 

 

Kara nods her head before remembering Lucy isn’t with her. “Yeah, no back.”

 

“Perfect, wear that one!” Kara shakes her head as she can hear a small clap from the other side of the phone. 

 

“Okay, thank you Lucy. I’ll see you in a bit.” Kara lays the dress on the bed behind her as she grabs her phone from between her shoulder and jaw. 

 

“Bye Kara.” The line dies and Kara tosses her phone on her bed. She stares at the dress and runs her hand through her hair before she starts to change. 

 

—

 

“You realize I have to pick up Lucy right?” Sam groans as she sits against Lena’s headboard. 

 

Lena looks over her shoulder with a glare and Sam puts her hands up in defense. “I just need help and then you’re free to go.” 

 

“Why of course, your Majesty.” Sam bows her head with a smile and chuckle. 

 

Lena rolls her eyes before looking back at the closet in front of her. “I just don’t know what to wear.”

 

“Well, apparently she’s having the same problem.” Sam turns her phone around to show messages from Lucy to Lena. 

 

_ Useless. Absolutely useless.  _

_ I can’t believe this. _

_ I’ve never seen her this nervous. _

_ Please tell me Lena’s no better. _

 

Lena smiles fondly, picturing Kara in her situation. She wonders if Lucy would tell her what Kara will be wearing, wonders if that would make her choice any easier. Her wonder stops in its tracks as she gets back to the issue at hand. 

 

She focuses on the dresses she has, a black-tie event requires a black dress. Her hand runs over the shoulders of a few dresses before slipping between two and sliding the dresses apart. She grips two hangers and pulls them off of the closet rack. She holds the first one in front of her, turning around for Sam to see. She holds it out to the side and replaces it with the other.

 

“Which one?” Lena walks to the mirror on the side of her bed. 

 

Sam stands from her spot on the bed, walking up to Lena and scratching at her forehead in contemplation. She shakes her head in disagreement, walking back to Lena’s closet and sifting through more of Lena’s dresses. Lena lowers the dresses and walks back to the closet, placing each dress back on the rack as Sam rummages through her clothes. Sam grips one from the rack, looking it over before putting it back, then another, she goes through a handful of dresses like this before she picks one and smiles. Lena follows her as she steps away from the closet, closing it behind them. Sam holds it out with glee. 

 

“Perfect!” The dress Sam offers has off the shoulder sleeves and a deep neckline, all black and incredibly well fitting. Lena nods her head before taking the dress and laying it out on the bed. Lena starts undressing herself as Sam stands in her room, looking at her watch before speaking. 

 

“Okay, I have to go get Lucy now. We’ll see you and Kara there.” Sam walks up to Lena before Lena takes her shirt off, kissing her on the cheek and walking out the bedroom door. 

 

“Thank you, Sam!” Lena calls out as Sam leaves.

 

“Love you!” Sam shouts and then closes the apartment door. 

 

Lena takes a deep breath and goes back to undressing. Her shirt and skirt fall away to join the clothes that make home in the laundry basket. She takes a look at herself in the mirror, her hands run over herself in a moment of nervous self-assessment. It takes her a moment but she shakes her head free of anxiety and begins to take her bra off. She tosses it into her laundry basket as a chime rings from her phone. 

 

She walks over to the plugged electronic device, unlocking her screen to see Kara’s text message.

 

_ I’m really excited about tonight. _

 

Lena can’t help the smile that spreads on her face, a warm flush in her cheeks as she locks her phone and goes back to finding suitable underwear. Thoughts of Kara and her at the banquet flood her mind, plaguing her with both excitement and nerves with every image that flashes in her head. 

 

While she is slow about it, she ends up dressed and ready. She chooses a black clutch, slipping her invite inside along with her wallet, keys and a few essentials. As she double checks everything she walks back to her bedside table, picking up her phone and sliding it into the clutch. The clock that hangs in her living room ticks away with each second that passes, her hands rub together with nerves as she waits for Kara. 

 

The thoughts of her and Kara return, more anxiety than excitement this time. A part of her has the urge to text Kara that she’s suddenly not feeling well. Another part of her reminds herself that Lucy would see her at the banquet without Kara and relay back to Kara how she lied. Another part says she doesn’t really have to go to the banquet in the first place. Each part of her bickers, picking different sides on the issue. Thousands of arguments rage in her head and she blinks tightly as if the thoughts would disappear like a magic act, look away a moment and the magician’s assistant disappears. Before she has the chance to open them again a knock echoes on the wood of her door, the thoughts scatter like a flock of birds scared by a snapping twig. 

 

She takes a deep breath, opening her eyes and picking her clutch from where she threw it on the couch. With a confident first step she walks to the door, another deep breath, and she swings the door open to be met with a vision of god. 

 

Kara stands in front of Lena in a black dress that hangs from around her neck, the fabric crossing over her chest and then draping all the way to the ground, a few inches of the dress falls to the ground. She has a necklace with a jewel set at the end, resting right between the top of her cleavage. Her wrists are adorned with a few bracelets. Her hair is up in a braided bun. One would think her a reoccurring member to high society events if they didn’t look at her right wrist, a wrist that bares a small black box on a military paracord bracelet. 

 

Lena stands in awe of Kara, her mouth wide with shock. Every muscle in her arms are on display, without flexing they still show a definition of Kara’s muscles. Lena opens and closes her mouth multiple times, clearing her throat as she looks back up to Kara’s eyes. Eyes that seem to be a shade of blue only found in Kara’s eyes. 

 

“Wow.” Lena whispers, it comes more as a breath of air than a word.

 

Kara smiles, lowering her head in embarrassment. “Thank you. You look absolutely stunning as well.”

 

Lena smiles, the flush of her cheeks burns as it typically does when Lena is near or thinking of Kara. “We should, um, we should get going.” 

 

“Yes, let’s go.” Kara smiles, she extends her arm and Lena wraps her own around it as they leave Lena’s apartment behind.

 

Lena has a driver awaiting them in the garage, as they go to the valet a long black Cadillac pulls up and a young valet opens the door for them. Lena allows Kara in first before giving a twenty dollar bill to the boy as she slides into the car. 

 

Lena mindlessly sets her hand down between them and nearly jumps when a warm touch spreads beneath her palm. She looks down to see Kara gently grasping her hand with a brilliant smile adorning her face. Lena smiles in return, spreading her fingers as Kara intertwines their hand. 

 

It only takes them a few minutes as the car pulls up to a sidewalk and the driver knocks on the partition. Lena takes a breath, without opening the door she can hear the media and news reporters speaking over each other. 

 

She waits a moment and the door is opened for her from the banquet host’s valets. Lena leaves the car, hand still holding Kara’s as she exits. Kara slides out next to her, their arms touching with an electricity that could power an entire city. The electricity that charges through Lena loses power as the lights of cameras blind her happiness and are replaced with anxiety. She pulls from Kara’s grasp, taking hold of her clutch in both hands as an excuse for why she abandoned Kara’s touch.

 

They walk past media crews without giving them attention, Lena is stopped at the entrance until she pulls her invitation out of her clutch. 

 

“My da-,” She stops herself as she points the security to Kara. “My guest.”

 

The two men standing at the entrance nod their heads and step aside, letting both women walk through without issue. Lena takes a deep breath as they walk forward. A table sits in front of them with small cards, two bright women smile as they approach. 

 

“Hi, how may I help you?” The first lady grips a binder at her side as Lena approaches. 

 

“Doctor Lena Luthor, with guest.” Lena points to Kara, not making the mistake she made at the door. 

 

“Okay, Doctor Luthor. Thank you so much for attending. Appetizers are set out, we have about two hours before the banquet begins.” The young woman picks up Lena’s name card and slips it into her binder. She picks another card up that is bare. “And your guest’s name?”

 

“Kara Danvers.” Kara and Lena answer together, causing them both to let out a soft laugh. 

 

“Thank you. Enjoy your evening, Miss Danvers, and good luck Miss Luthor.” The woman who hasn’t spoken motions them to follow the line of people, entering the banquet hall. 

 

Lena smiles at her and nods her thanks, she wraps her arm around Kara’s upper arm and they walk together to the line of others. Kara turns towards Lena and takes a few steps forward so she’s closer to Lena.

 

“I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable when I held your hand. I think I may have read this situation wrong.” Kara gives Lena a sad chuckle and it makes Lena want to slap her past self for pulling away from Kara.

 

Lena opens her mouth and shakes her head with a sigh. “No, no. I think you read it fine, I’m just not familiar with it.” 

 

Kara smiles, lowering her hand to brush her knuckles against the back of Lena’s hand. “Okay good, because I really like this situation.” 

 

Lena rolls her eyes with a full smile. “Me too.” 

 

“Also what did that woman-” Kara stops but is interrupted as an arm gets thrown around her neck, the arm that is definitely stretching just to reach Kara’s neck. 

 

“Who would have thought that you would get here before us?” Sam speaks from where she appears at Lena’s side. 

 

Both Lucy and Sam have come up to them, hand in hand with bright smiles. Lucy has her arm hanging on Kara’s neck until Kara laughs and turns it into a hug, Lucy reluctantly pulls away from Sam, Lena smirks at her friend.

 

“Well, since you’re wearing your all black suit instead of your black with white tie, vests, and undershirt, I could’ve thought we would get here before you,” Lena smirks as she points to Sam’s change in wardrobe. 

 

Kara looks at Lucy with shock, “You did not!” She slaps her friend’s arm lightly. 

 

Lucy and Sam both feign innocence for a few seconds before looking at each other and smiling. They lean into each other, Sam a good head’s length above Lucy. 

 

“I am sorry though you were about to say something when we interrupted.” Sam points out, pulling the attention back to Kara. 

 

Kara’s brow furrow for a moment and Lena curses Sam for being polite because when Kara does recall her question, it is one she doesn’t want to answer. “Oh yes! What was that woman wishing you luck for?”

 

Lena waves a hand in front of her, “That was nothing.” 

 

“Shut up,” Sam says jokingly. “Lena is one of the candidates to win the Medical Inquiry’s Doctor of the Year award along with the Greatest Early Career Achievement. No one has won both, the doctors’ nominated for Doctor of the Year are typically older and have more experience.”

 

“That's amazing, Lena, that’s not nothing!” Kara says excitedly, her hand that had been brushing by Lena’s hand goes to hold Lena’s hand with excitement. 

 

Lena feels her Kara-centric flush rush to her face once more. “I guess. Thank you, Kara.”

 

Kara leans closer to Lena, their arms once again trading electricity as they move up the line. Sam and Lucy walk behind them as they enter the ballroom. The dancing floor that the ballroom has is covered with tables, the tables are blocked by velvet rope as waiters and busboys rush between tables to finish setting the area. The group makes their way to an unoccupied area of the rest of the ballroom which is an open floor, two tables at each end of the room with appetizers, snacks and drinks. 

 

Kara’s hand lets go of Lena and while Lena almost asks for her hand back Kara wraps it around her waist as the room gets crowded with more people entering. Lena is at first shocked by the display but then settles into the warmth of being held. She looks up at Kara with a smile and then turns to the other couple in their group. Sam has her own hand around Lucy, who has a hand around Sam. Lena bites her lip and has an urge to put her hand around Kara but she keeps both of her hands occupied with her clutch as they continue to talk. 

 

She feels Kara lean a bit and a moment later there’s a hot wind on her ear, “Is this okay?’

 

As if Lena didn’t know what she was referring to, Kara brushes her finger against the fabric of Lena’s dress. Lena’s verbal answer is swallowed and she simply nods her head in response. Kara smiles at her and they go back to conversing.

 

A few doctors approach their group, some congratulating Lena on the nominations, others wishing her luck. Sadly a handful don’t come with good intentions but she isn’t alone as Kara, Sam, and even Lucy make a threatening force around her. 

 

One such woman approaches, her dress breaking the black-tie standard as it’s bright red, matching her heels and showing off her serpent body tattoo. Lena bites the inside of her cheeks as Veronica Sinclair approaches her group. 

 

“Doctor Luthor, Doctor Arias, and friends. What a pleasure.” She offers her hand out as a royal would, fingers down and back of palm up, as if awaiting a kiss from her subjects. 

 

Kara grips her hand first, but she doesn’t lean down to succumb to Veronica’s venomous personality, she turns Veronica’s hand into a proper handshake. “I’m Kara Danvers, I don’t believe we’ve had the pleasure of meeting.”

 

“No, I don’t think we have.” Veronica’s eyes follow every line of Kara, every so often they flick to Lena in challenge before going back to examine Kara like a specimen on a dissection table. “Lena, is this your snack of the night? She’s quite a piece.”

 

Lena bites harder on her cheeks, she can taste the metal of blood. She is about to answer Veronica when she speaks up again, Lena’s grip on her clutch tightens.

 

“Little lamb, I’m Veronica Sinclair, and your pleasure will be mine.” Veronica unfurls her serpentine smile.

 

“Pardon?” Kara looks confused at her innuendo, oblivious to the daggers Veronica and Lena are throwing through their eyes. 

 

“Nevermind.” Veronica waves her hand in the air. “What is it that you do that makes you so, desirable?” She runs her hand up Kara’s exposed forearm, Lena can see Kara’s skin fold in as Veronica tightens her grip on the muscle.

 

“I’m, um,” Kara looks down at Veronica’s hand before stepping back half a step, then holding Lena a bit closer. “I am, um, a firefighter.”

 

Veronica curls her fingers at Kara’s rejection, humming her satisfaction at the question. She turns her attention to Sam, her eyes following the lines of Lucy’s outfit. “A little lamb and a little rabbit, how cute.”

 

Lucy doesn’t react to the hand Veronica extends, Lena can see Lucy’s jaw tighten. “I’m no rabbit.”

 

“Oh, a fighter. Do you two,” Veronica points to Lucy and Kara with two fingers, “work together?”

 

“Yeah, Lucy’s one of my squad mates at the station,” Kara says happily, Lena sighs internally at how Kara plays into Veronica’s hands.

 

“How wonderful.” Veronica turns back to Kara with a wicked smirk. “Kara, I would love to steal you away just for a moment and hear about this station where you work.”

 

“Sorry, I’m here for Lena.” Lena’s tension in her cheeks releases as she feels Kara brush her thumb against her dress once again. “I’m quite happy talking with her. Maybe another time.” 

 

Veronica’s jaw shift in agitation as Kara fully turns her back on Veronica to face Lucy. Lena looks to Veronica who looks Kara up and down once more before walking away. Kara may have won but Lena knows the snake will be back.

 

“What was that about?” Lucy asks Sam, whose eyes still glare Veronica’s retreating form.

 

“Veronica Sinclair, she works for Morgan Edge. She’s the lead surgeon at the Edge Medical Hospital. Always aiming to be the best. She’s not quite happy with not being nominated for either award.” Sam’s eyes soften as they fall to Lucy, a smile graces her face as she looks down.

 

“She always has a knack for getting under our skins.” Lena spits out, frustration deep in her voice.

 

Kara looks down at Lena with a furrowed brow before gesturing her head at Lucy. Which leads to Lucy offering to get drinks, dragging Sam along with her. Kara’s hand leaves Lena’s side and goes to her upper arms. 

 

“Hey, are you okay?” Kara rubs up and down Lena’s arms, soothing the tension that had flooded her with Veronica’s encounter.

 

Lena looks up from where she was staring at the ground. “Better.” She gives Kara a genuine smile but it doesn’t reach her ears the way it usually does for Kara. 

 

“Should I have done something different? I’ve never been to one of these and I just didn’t know what to do. She offered to talk but I didn’t like how you kind of tensed up when she talked to me so I wanted to make sure you were okay. Should I apologize to her? Will this make her meaner to you? Do I need to kick her ass? Cause I’ll do it. Don’t think I won’t.” At the start of Kara’s rant Lena was immediately going to apologize for making Kara worry but the last bit makes her nearly burst into laughter, she raises a hand to cover her mouth as she tries to control her outburst.

 

“No, no. You did wonderful. I just didn’t like the way she was looking at you.” Lena looks up at Kara, who’s worry has changed to a gentle smile.

 

“Well, I meant what I said. I’m only here for you. So don’t worry about it.” Lena smiles and nods her head. 

 

One of Kara’s hands goes to hold her cheek before quickly going back to Lena’s arm as a stranger approaches. They aren’t a doctor, as they wear all black and a small headset and look no older than twenty. Kara smiles, her hand settling back around Lena’s waist. As the stranger talks to Lena, Kara looks over her shoulder at Lucy and Sam who are looking at them from the bar. Lucy hesitantly puts a thumbs up and then flips her thumb downward before shaking it in the middle. Kara stops herself from laughing and simply puts a thumb up behind Lena’s back. Lucy makes a fist and punches the air a bit, earning a laugh from Sam.

 

Lena pulls away from Kara and looks at her for a moment, “I’m sorry to leave but they need to talk to each of the nominees for the awards. I’ll be right back, I’m so sorry.”

 

“Go, go. It’s completely okay.” Kara smiles as Lena walks away with the stranger, Lena looks back a few times and Kara just ushers her forward with a flick of her hand. 

 

Kara turns back to Lucy and Sam who have joined a conversation with someone Kara can only assume knows Sam. Lucy’s hand is rubbing at Sam’s back lovingly while Sam rests her arm at the small of Lucy’s back. Kara pulls her phone from the secret pockets of the dress, flipping it open and walking to an unoccupied corner of the room, behind a potted plant.

 

“Hello?” A strange voice picks up after the third ring.

 

“Who is this? Where’s Alex?” Kara furrows her brow.

 

The voice sounds farther away from the microphone, “Alex, I think it’s your sister.”

 

Kara waits a moment before she hears a distant muttering followed by, “Shit. Shit. One second. Shit.” A deep breath and then, “Hey Kara!”

 

“Don’t hey Kara me, who was that?” Kara asks intent on knowing the strange voice. 

 

“Nothing. No one. What’s up?” Alex answers, she sounds a bit out of breath.

 

“Are you okay?” Kara asks again, now worried for her sister.

 

“Oh, yeah I’m fine. What is troubling you though? Why did you call?” Alex responds and it makes Kara look past her potted plant to where Lucy and Sam are still talking, still distracted.

 

“I’m so fucked, Alex. Her hands are so warm and nice, and god, she’s just so beautiful. I couldn’t believe it when I first saw her, I still can’t believe it. And she’s up for not one, but two awards! Two awards that have never been won by the same people! Ever! Do you hear how amazing she is?” Kara takes a breath after word vomiting about Lena.

 

“You got it bad,” Alex responds and Kara can do nothing but nod in agreement. 

 

—

 

Kara’s leg bounces anxiously as they sit at their table. She twirls her fork in her hand as the speaker continues his introduction and announcements. Whenever a round of applause breaks out Kara puts her fork down to join in the thunderstorm of claps. She picks up her fork again and picks at the food in front of her, cutting pieces of chicken apart before eating. 

 

Her eyes find themselves on the profile of Lena more often than not. Lena’s lips, her jaw, her eyes. She studies her as they sit together. One of Lena’s hands rests on Kara’s forearm as the award presenter takes the podium. Kara sets her fork down and slides her hand into Lena’s, giving her a smile to help her remain calm. 

 

“The winner for this year’s Greatest Early Career award goes to,” Kara can feel Lena’s grip tighten on her hand. “Doctor Lena Luthor! For putting her patients’ care and comfort above everything, even income.” 

 

The tables erupt into applause, Kara claps her hands together with a force hard enough to make her palms sting. Kara’s eyes watch as Lena rises from her seat, brushing the skirt of her dress down to walk to the podium. Lena puts a hand on Kara’s shoulder, Kara presses her fingers to Lena as Lena walks away. Kara’s applause amplifies with excitement. Across the tables she sees Sam hollering and clapping with the same vigor as Kara, Lucy laughing at Sam but clapping eagerly alongside her. 

 

She smiles at the love Lena is receiving, the crowd around her all clapping and smiling as she ascends the few stairs of the stage. She doesn’t bother to look for Veronica, happy with seeing the majority being gracious to Lena. 

 

Lena walks up to the podium with a smile, taking the clear award with engraved words. She approaches the microphone with a smile and waits as everyone settles down. Right as she is about to speak Kara shouts her excitement and then silences when Lena looks at her with a blush.

 

“Well, first off I just want to say thank you to the board for even nominating me. There are so many of us just getting started and,”

 

Kara watches with awe as Lena speaks, she smiles every time Lena’s eyes fall on her. She doesn’t want to take her eyes off even as she feels her phone vibrates in her dress. Without looking down she slips her phone out and sets it down next to her plate, hiding it like a student would to avoid being seen by the teacher. With a quick swipe, she’s opening her messages from Lucy.

 

_ Whipped. _

_ Absolutely whipped.  _

 

Kara rolls her eyes, locking her phone and turning it over before glancing to Lucy and Sam. Sam is just as enthralled with Lena’s speech as Kara was, but Lucy is staring at Kara with a full smirk. Lucy makes a quick flip with her wrist, mimicking the actions of whipping someone. While Kara can’t hear her from the distance and Lena’s speech echoing over the speakers she can see Lucy open her mouth to make a whiplash sound. 

 

Kara shakes her head and looks back to Lena who is receiving her round of applause as she makes her way down the stairs, only for an attendant to usher her back up and behind the podium. The next speaker shakes Lena’s hand and then walks up to the podium.

 

“This year we have a most unpredictable situation. In the 79 years that the Medical Inquiry has been hosting this banquet, we have never had the pleasure of one nominee being nominated for both categories. With this, we would also like to say that we have never had the pleasure of the same person winning both awards in the same year,” There’s a long pause while everyone looks at the speaker expectantly. Kara’s on the edge of the seat, waiting for them to continue. “Until now. Ladies and Gentlemen, the award for Doctor of the Year goes to, none other than, Lena Luthor.”

 

This time people stand on their feet with applause, hollers, and shouts coming from more than just Sam and Kara. The entire table area erupts into cheers and applause, a thunderstorm within the banquet hall.

 

Sadly Lena doesn’t get another speech as the speaker concludes the ceremony. A small orchestra fills in behind the podium, an attendant lifts the podium and removes it from the stage as people begin to get out of their seats. All around people get up to approach people at other tables, causing a chaos of shifting bodies, Kara loses Lena as soon as she’s off the stage. 

 

Kara slips her phone back into her pocket before getting up and walking through the sea of people. She pushes past a few people, some saying hello as they spoke with her at the beginning when she was with Lena. Without Lena, she feels incredibly out of place. 

 

It isn’t until four nails rake down her arm that her body nearly seizes with anxiety. “Lost little lamb?”

 

Kara turns to look at Veronica for only a second before looking back to the sea of people. “Um, no. I’m just, um, looking for Lena. I want to congratulate her.”

 

“Oh yes, her win. Seems they’ll just give out awards to anyone nowadays.” Veronica rolls her eyes.

 

Kara has to bite her lip from snapping at Veronica, she doesn’t respond and instead opts for looking for anyone who could be her scapegoat. She sees Lucy with Sam patiently waiting behind a few people. Kara starts to walk away when Veronica’s voice calls back to her.

 

“Leaving me so soon?” Veronica gives her an innocent look of despair.

 

Kara points to Sam and Lucy, “Um, yes.” 

 

She immediately dives back into the crowd, following the path she made to get to Lucy and Sam. They see her exit the crowd before she actually does, opening arms with big smiles as Kara gets closer. She gets to them with a relieved sigh.

 

“Everything okay?” Sam asks when she’s close enough to hear.

 

Kara nods her head. “Yeah, just ran into Veronica again. God, she says the most wretched things. Acting like Lena doesn’t deserve these awards. She does her best to make sure her patients are comfortable and taken care of, but Veronica just won’t quit. If she were half the doctor Lena was maybe she would’ve won. Lena is too good and pure to get shit like that from other doctors.”

 

Kara looks at Sam and Lucy, both of their eyes have gone wide with shock. Kara looks genuinely confused, she looks at herself before looking around to see what could be wrong. Behind her, Lena stands, award-less, with a wide mouth and something unreadable in her eyes.

 

“Lena.” Kara breathes her name out as she sees her.

 

From behind her Kara hears Lucy whisper something about “Getting drinks, again.”

 

“Did you- Did you mean what you just said?”  Lena asks as she twists her fingers in her hand.

 

Kara looks around and then steps to the side where Lena follows. “About Veronica being wretched?”

 

Lena shakes her head, “No, I know that. I mean about me?”

 

Kara furrows her brow in confusion. “Of course I did. Why wouldn’t I?”

 

Lena shrugs her shoulders. “Just, no one has ever said those things about me. It’s usually about how I got to where I am because my mother owns the hospital or because my brother paid them off.”

 

“Well, those people don’t know you the way I do.” Kara smiles at Lena as Lena’s tension seems to drain. 

 

One of Lena’s hands falls to Kara’s and they hold hands with smiles on their face. Kara would be content to stand there for a lifetime, if the building burnt down she would rather be with Lena in this moment than put it out. She only breaks the moment as a river of music flows through the banquet hall. 

 

“Do you want to dance?” Kara asks with a giddy smile.

 

Lena looks at her with confusion. “People don’t really dance here, Kara.”

 

“Wow, high society events really do suck. No dancing, next you’re gonna tell me you guys don’t play fire hose tug-of-war!” Kara feigns exasperated disappointment.

 

Lena shakes her head at Kara to play along. “I don’t think I’ve ever heard of fire hose tug-of-war.”

 

Kara sucks in a gasp of shock. “You rich folk are all so deprived!” 

 

Lena lets out a light chuckle until Kara takes her hand and drags her to in front of the stage. “Kara, what are you doing?”

 

Kara finds room between the tables and the stage where she and Lena can dance, settling there while Lena keeps asking what she’s’ doing. She moves Lena’s hand to her shoulder while settling one of her own on Lena’s hip. Her other hand goes to grip Lena’s, holding it out while the orchestra continues to play. 

 

“Just a little cultural mixing.” Kara smiles as she looks at her feet and starts moving. 

 

“Everyone’s looking,” Lena whispers as Kara pulls her an inch closer. 

 

Kara smiles and looks behind Lena at the groups that have backed away from tables and moved to the walls. “Well, if they’ve never heard of dancing I guess we do look a bit odd.”

 

Lena laughs into Kara’s shoulder so she doesn’t seem to have a hysterical breakdown. She rests her head on Kara’s shoulder, finding a rhythm with Kara’s steps and sways. 

 

Around them, as they become only aware of each other, the banquet staff start to move tables away. The dance floor becoming a bit wider as Kara leads Lena through the song the orchestra plays. Kara looks away from the public to Lena who’s head is resting on her shoulder but still looking up at her.

 

“Congratulations, we should go out and celebrate some time,” Kara whispers to Lena as they sway around the room.

 

Kara continues to hold Lena close, their bodies nearly becoming one as the black of their dresses melts together and their legs move as one. They step and sway on a cloud made of each other. Kara tosses Lena out for a spin and then pulls her back, even closer if possible. Lena doesn’t settle on Kara’s shoulder again, the two of them press forehead to forehead as the orchestra changes songs. 

 

“This is all the celebration I need.” Lena doesn’t see Kara’s goofy smile of happiness.

 

All around them couples start to join the dance. Lucy pulls Sam along first and Kara’s smile grows as her friend dances with Sam. As Kara continues to dance she lets go of Lena’s hand, sliding it down her arm and to her other hip. Lena readjusts her hands so they’re wrapped around Kara’s neck. Kara’s thumbs rub at the fabric of Lena’s dress and she watches as Lena’s smile grow. 

 

The two of them float on their secluded cloud, blocked from the rest of the world. Kara couldn’t care about anything else, only the world she sees in Lena. The stars that rest in the black universe of her hair. The nature that grows in the green of Lena’s eyes. The mountains of Lena’s collarbone, the hills of her lips, the sand of her skin. Kara finds herself absolutely enthralled by Lena, she only hopes Lena feels something similar.


	7. she is a living fire, such as i have never seen.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She hears Lucy’s response as a hum and then she settles deeper into the seat, resting fully as they drive through National City. She’s beginning to drift off when she hears a shout of kids from the side. She leans forward, sticking a hand out the window to wave at a growing group of kids at the fence of a school. Kara pulls at a small lever above her and the siren blares a few times, earning shouts and claps from the kids before she turns it off again.
> 
> “A firefighter’s work is never done.” Lucy peeps from the back.
> 
> Kara smiles as they get further away from the school, the engine pulling through the city to their fire station. As their truck pulls forward they get waved in by J’onn. His hand pats the side of the engine once they roll to a stop. Kara slides out of the passenger seat and gives J’onn a hug before turning back to unload her equipment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry this took so long, chapter 8 will be much quicker seeing as ive already started it. also good news! im back @canaries on tumblr just a different blog so go follow if you want to. hope you all enjoy!

She’s absolutely exhausted. The strain on her muscles is severe and she can’t feel her hands. Her feet cry with every step. Her only relief is when she sits inside the engine, waiting for Alex to finish so they can all go back to the station. She leans forward, her arms on the dashboard of the engine with her chin resting on her forearms. No more than ten feet in front of the engine Alex stands with a detective who is writing information into a small notebook. 

 

Kara rolls her eyes, moving one arm to slam into the engine’s steering wheel horn. The sound blares at Alex and the detective, the detective’s pen slips and a long line is scribbled on the notepad. Before Kara has a chance to say anything Lucy is loading into the engine and stealing her shot.

 

“Alex, stop flirting. We get it, she’s cute. You’ll see her again. Chop chop!” Lucy tosses her tank into the back, rolling her neck in pain. 

 

Kara looks back to Alex who is shaking her head and apologizing to the detective. As she says goodbye the detective smiles and leans in, giving Alex a soft kiss on the cheek. Kara makes a show of clapping loudly and Alex is stumbling and racing to get back into the engine. 

 

“I hate both of you.” Alex sits in the driver’s seat, tossing a small piece of paper into the center console. The piece of paper oddly looks the same size as the paper from the detective’s notepad and has a distinct scribbled line on it. Kara simply smiles before leaning back into her seat in exhaustion.

 

Her hands rub at her eyes, still itching from smoke and heat. She feels a soft slap from behind her as Lucy hands her a water bottle. Kara holds one hand out of the window and pours water on it, settling the bottle between her legs before rubbing both hands together. The grime and soot falls to the ground as they drive through the streets. With a bit more water she splashes her eyes, handing it back to Lucy and wiping at her eyes. 

 

“You know you wouldn’t have this problem if you didn’t take your mask off in the middle of a fire.” Alex quips from Kara’s side. 

 

Kara just hums her agreement before blinking rapidly, the excess water falling from her eyes. “Thanks, Lucy.” 

 

She hears Lucy’s response as a hum and then she settles deeper into the seat, resting fully as they drive through National City. She’s beginning to drift off when she hears a shout of kids from the side. She leans forward, sticking a hand out the window to wave at a growing group of kids at the fence of a school. Kara pulls at a small lever above her and the siren blares a few times, earning shouts and claps from the kids before she turns it off again. 

 

“A firefighter’s work is never done.” Lucy peeps from the back.

 

Kara smiles as they get further away from the school, the engine pulling through the city to their fire station. As their truck pulls forward they get waved in by J’onn. His hand pats the side of the engine once they roll to a stop. Kara slides out of the passenger seat and gives J’onn a hug before turning back to unload her equipment. 

 

Kara sets her tank against a stone pillar in the middle of the garage, she pulls out her mask and gloves that she threw on the floor of the seat. The heavy jacket she’s wearing becomes a burden and she shimies out of it, leaving her in a tank top and a dragging jacket around her waist. 

 

With a huff of air she lifts the tank and walks over to the oxygen tank, leaving her tank in the line of the tanks to get filled. James looks at her and smiles as he fills the tanks. She waves at him before going back to the gear she left by the stone pillar. She’s bending down to lift her helmet and other items off the ground when she feels a cold wet stream slam into her arm. 

 

She looks up and Vasquez looks at her with the biggest shit eating grin. Kara puts a hand up in warning but Vasquez just turns her grin into a smirk before spraying Kara again. Kara stands, shirt soaking and pants beginning to get wet. She wipes her face of the cold water, happy for the temperature change but in no way going to let Vasquez win. She darts after a moment of not moving, shocking Vasquez into a sprint. Vasquez shoots the hose over her shoulder before the hose snaps at the last of its length and she throws it. Kara leaps over the hose as it goes flying past her. She skids on the concrete floor, the water that has been sprayed all around Engine 59 making it difficult to stop her feet from slipping. 

 

She lets out a yelp as she slips onto her back, sliding away from the engine as her wet clothes continue to slide against the concrete ground. She bursts into laughter and doubles over in laughter, gripping at her abs. Vasquez joins in the laughter, filling the garage with laughs and wheezes. Kara slowly falls back into sanity, her laughs falling silent as she opens her eyes to see a standing figure with their arms on their hips above her. 

 

“What are you doing?” Alex’s voice breaks the laughter of the garage, Kara swallows a lump in her throat before she starts to stand.

 

“Messing around.” Kara tries to smile at her sister but she lowers her head when Alex’s glare intensifies. 

 

“I don’t even want to know. Clean this up, I’m going out.” Alex points to the puddles around the garage before rolling her eyes and turning around. 

 

Kara turns around as well, walking over to the rack of towels in the garage before she turns back to a fleeing Alex, “Wait like out out? Like on a date? Is it with the detective?” 

 

Alex groans and continues to leave, the door swinging shut as she exits the garage. Vasquez saddles up next to Kara, grabbing a towel before whispering to Kara, “It’s definitely with the detective.” 

 

Kara smiles and pushes her shoulder against Vasquez in jest, both of them throwing towels onto the puddles before leaning down to wipe them around the water. Kara’s tank top starts to stick to her skin as it dries, the water on her skin making her cold as the garage’s air conditioning turns on. She runs a hand through her hair, pushing the short wet hair back into a comb over like style. Vasquez gets up to ring out the towels while Kara rubs at the puddles, getting the towels to suck up as much moisture as they can. She leaves each towel near the puddles so Vasquez can ring it out. At the end of their drying session Kara’s clothes itch as they stick to her skin. 

 

“I’m going to go change.” Kara wipes her forehead with the back of her arm, before pointing over to the double doors that leads to the station’s living room. 

 

Vasquez nods, “I am going to actually wash the beast like J’onn asked.”

 

The both of them wave each other goodbye as they part, James still in the corner filling tanks with a smirk on his face. Kara points at him and he puts his hands up in innocence, a small chuckle falling from his lips. She chuckles and leaves the garage behind, walking into the living room but before she heads to her office she turns to the kitchen and grabs a water bottle. Unscrewing the cap, she downs the water bottle like a man who was stranded for days in the desert. 

 

She finishes it in a few gulps before tossing it in the recycling bin and grabbing another one. She takes smaller gulps, savoring the cold flavor as she walks away from the kitchen. She makes her way towards her office when she runs into Barry. 

 

“Oh! Kara! Just the person I was looking for!” Barry’s smile is beaming and Kara looks at him expectantly, “Oh, yeah. Um, a woman came by saying you invited her. She’s in your office. Also Detective Sawyer called and left a message about some job the two of you were doing but she’s going to lunch so she won’t be by her phone until later.” 

 

Barry squeezes past her and walks into the living room while Kara stands in the middle of the hall way with wide eyes. Her memory gets flooded all at once of her inviting Lena to the station for lunch, of her asking Maggie to send her information of the fires from the last three months, of her not realizing today was the day both of those were happening. She palms her forehead and rubs at her temple. 

 

She goes onward to her office with no plan, itchy clothes and water bottle in hand. Lightly, she knocks on her office door before slowly opening it and poking her head inside, the opening door hiding her still wet clothes. Inside Lena stands from the seat she had chosen, a black dress with cherries falling around it adorns her body. She smiles her beautiful smile at Kara and Kara takes a moment to just look at her, the light from her office window outlining Lena in a holy light. She forgets everything she might have said and just stares.

 

“Kara?” Lena’s voice makes her clothes her hanging jaw and look up at her.

 

“Lena! Hi! How are you?” Kara smiles. 

 

“I’m good.” Her tone is laced with confusion, “Are you going to come in? Or are we eating somewhere else?” 

 

“Nope, nope. We are definitely eating here. I’m just, um, I’m super wet.” Kara wants to pull the words back into her mouth and push them down her throat but they’ve already spilled. 

 

“Pardon me?” Lena’s eyebrows raise in shock and Kara decides to let the door fully open, no longer hiding her wet clothes and exposing her sticking clothes to Lena. 

 

“No, not like wet. I mean.” She follows Lena’s eyes which have dropped from her face to now her shirt. “Yeah. I mean like soaked. Um, I just need to grab new clothes and then we can eat.” 

 

Lena closes her mouth and nods her head, “Should I wait outside or?”

 

“No! No, it’s okay.” She closes the door behind her, walking past Lena to a closet door at the side of her office. 

 

She pulls down a duffel bag and sifts through the contents for a moment before pulling out a t-shirt and pants. Without thinking she pulls off the still wet tank top and begins to pull her fire suit off, setting both of them on the floor before she grabs a towel out of her bag. She runs the towel over her body swiftly, luckily her sports bra and boxers are only lightly damp. When she’s done with the towel she pulls her henley t-shirt over her head and then tugs her joggers up to her hips. She throws the duffel bag back up onto the shelf it belongs before she turns around. 

 

Lena is looking at her with wide eyes and a slightly agape mouth, it closes for a moment before Lena licks at her lips. Kara clears her throat before throwing the towel in the pile of wet clothes.

 

“Oh god, this was so awkward. Lena, I am so sorry. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable. If you want to go you can. God, I’m so stupid. I’m so sorry.” Kara puts both of her hands on her head in frustration. 

 

Lena shakes her head. “No, Kara it’s okay. I mean, we’re both women. I am a doctor, I’ve seen worse bodies.” Lena stops talking as soon as she says the last letter. “I meant, health wise and anatomically. Not to sexualize you. Not that you aren’t sexy.”

 

A knock on the office door makes both of them stop. Kara takes a deep breath, thankful for the interruption. Lena sits back down in her seat and Kara sits in her office chair.

 

“Come in.” Kara’s voice cracks half way through her sentence. 

 

Clark pokes his head through the small crack he makes by opening the door. “Lucy’s making lunch, her family seven cheese lasagna.” Kara tries to speak but then Clark looks over and sees Lena. “Oh, Lena, nice to see you again.”

 

He loses his smile and leaves the room. Kara rubs at her temples,  _ fuck _ . She shakes the thought from her head before standing. She walks over to Lena and motions for her to join her. 

 

“You can leave your purse here, I’ll lock my office.” Kara takes Lena’s hand and smiles. They leave the office butbefore going down the hall Kara turns back to the door and locks it as promised.

 

They both make their way down to the living room. The group of firefighters are scattered around the room. Vasquez and Lucy are in the kitchen with Barry, each of them helping the other get lunch ready. Clark and James are playing with a big fluffy white ball of energy and a squishy football. As they come into the room the dog turns to Kara with his tongue lolling out of his mouth. Kara puts a hand up in warning but he just races from Clark and James to her, she falls backwards with the massive force of the hound. 

 

“Krypto! I just got dry!” The dog’s tongue wipes at her cheeks and face until a sharp whistle makes his head perk up and he walks back to Clark. Kara wipes at her face with fake aggrevation. 

 

“So that’s Krypto. How many dogs does this station have?” Lena helps Kara back to her feet with a laugh.

 

“Three. My baby, Lucy’s beast of a dog—Monster, and Krypto. Krypto is our search and rescue hound.” Kara walks Lena over to one of the unoccupied couches, sitting down next to each other and across from James and Clark who continue to play with Krypto. 

 

Winn walks in with all of his attention on the tablet in his hand before snagging an apple from the fruit bowl and turning back down the hall. Siobhan walks in from the garage with dirt on her face, she goes to the sinks in the kitchen and starts washing off, working around the cooks of the kitchen.

 

“Okay so what’s everyone’s thing?” Lena asks with genuine interest. 

 

Kara smiles at Lena’s brightened face, “What do you mean?”

 

“Well, you are obviously the ‘muscle’, Winn is the ‘brains’, Alex is the ‘boss’ but not the chief. But what about everyone else?” Lena tucks her legs underneath herself, one arm on the back of the couch, the other working on pulling her heels off. 

 

“Alex is  _ not _ the boss.” Kara scoffs.

 

In harmony, everyone in the room speaks up, “Yes, she is.”

 

Lena laughs to herself and Kara just throws her arms up in surrender. “Well, Vasquez is our resident chef.” Kara points over to Vasquez who does a mock salute without looking up from her ingredients. “James is our mechanic and charming face of the station. Always on our posters and calendars. Barry is our PR type, he deals a lot with people calling in or people who show up here.”

 

“He walked me to your office.” Lena points out.

 

“Exactly!” Kara throws the memory of what happened in her office into the back of her mind. “Lucy is our resident prankster, Clark is Krypto’s handler and driver of engine 73. Leslie is our class clown.”

 

“Prankster and Class Clown are two different specifications?” Lena asks curiously.

 

“Absolutely.” Kara says as if it’s obvious, “Psi is lady serious, never laughs. I don’t think I’ve seen her smile.”

 

“Last Halloween when Imra proposed!” Lucy shouts over her shoulder as she dices away at something Kara can’t see.

 

“Oh yeah! So I guess she can smile, she just doesn’t like to.” Lena lets out a loud chuckle she covers with her hand. “Imra, our hippie. Finally, J’onn, the dad. That’s our little family.”

 

“Sounds perfect.” Lena says softly.

 

“It’s much easier to surround yourself with a family found than the family you’re given. I would trade any of them for the world. The family you’re given can disappoint you or leave you,” Kara looks at her hands with a solemn look, “or break you. But a found family? They can maybe make you sad or mad, but they learn and they do better.” 

 

Lena smiles lightly and leans her head on the back pillow of the couch. “That sounds like heaven.” She looks out at everyone around the living room and kitchen.

 

Kara looks down at Lena and smiles, “Yeah, it really is.” 

 

—

 

Lena lets out a boisterous laugh when Winn is able to keep two carrots between his lips and gums, he growls lightly before one falls out and lands in his sauce. The entire table erupts in laughter when he swears under his breath and Lena feels Kara lean into her as they laugh and her heart warms. They’re all in the midst of a cacophony of laughs when the doors of the garage swing open.

 

The table all turns to look at Alex entering the station, everyone but Lena holds their drinks up still laughing as they shout “Alex!”

 

Alex doesn’t move further into the room, her arms cross over her chest and she juts her hip out. Her eyes fall short of Lena but land on Kara. From behind her a smaller woman walks into the living room, one hand is holding a large folder that’s on the brink of spilling out while her other hand is settled in her back pocket. Lena leans behind everyone who is sitting to see a light flash on something golden, she squints and can barely make out the distinct logo of the National City Police Department.

 

Kara turns to Lena, whispers in her ear and then leaves the briefest of kisses on her cheek. “I’ll be right back.” 

 

Kara stands and walks over to the police officer and Alex, Lena raises a hand to her cheek in shock and confusion. She lowers her hand back to her fork and looks across from her at Lucy who smirks at her before shoveling a mouth full of lasagna into her mouth. Lena looks down at her food, trying to will the blush she can feel growing to disappear. 

 

Kara walks back to the table and grabs her dinner plate and utensils. Alex and the police officer walk past everyone, not sparing a glance to anyone, and head down the hall to the row of offices. Everyone starts to look between each other then to Kara then to the hallway. Kara is silent as she washes her plate and utensils before setting them amongst the pile of dishes that rest between the sink and dishwasher. Kara walks back to the living room, looks at Lena for a second and then continues down the hall. 

 

“Well then.” Lucy stands and begins pulling finished plates into a pile, those with food still on their plates scurry to the kitchen island bar to finish. 

 

Vasquez starts collecting cups and sets them on the opposite side of the sink from the partially clean dishes. Lena starts helping Lucy by grabbing plates and utensils. Vasquez fills the sink to the top with water before putting a drop of soap in the water. Lucy starts piling the plates closest to the sink then ushers Vasquez away. Lena stands next to Lucy without permission and when Lucy scrapes the excess food off and into the trash cans then sets the dish in the water, Lena grabs the dish brush and begins to clean the rest of it off. Lucy sets about three more plates in before she turns to see Lena helping her.

 

“You don’t have to do that.” Lucy says quietly, the entire room has become quiet, as if a loud noise would set off an explosion.

 

Lena shrugs her shoulders. “I want to help.”

 

“And maybe buy time so you don’t go into Kara’s office during a sister fight?” Lucy jokes.

 

“I don’t know what’s happening but if that’s what is happening then yes, maybe I’m buying time to not get between them.” Lena smiles at Lucy as they continue to go through dishes. 

 

They go through nearly half the dishes in silence after that, and something gnaws at Lena in the back of her mind. She opens her mouth a few times to speak but never says anything, instead she closes her mouth and goes back to scrubbing the plates and cups. They’re nearly done when Lucy nudges her shoulder.

 

“Spit it out.” Lena looks at her with confusion. “You’ve been wanting to say something for a while now, your brows are all furrowed.”

 

Lena sighs, “Do you know anything about the burn scar on Kara’s back?” 

 

Both of them move from the sink to the pile of wet dishes. Lena starts to wipe them down and put them in the dishwasher when Lucy stops moving all together.

 

“How did you see it?” Lucy turns accusatory and looks at Lena.

 

“She took her clothes off,” When Lucy’s eyes go wide she waves a hand between them, “in order to get out of wet clothes. And she turned her back to me and it was just, there. I mean, it covers her entire back, it was hard not to miss.”

 

Lucy sighs and rubs her forehead before going back to drying the dishes. “I want to tell you Lena but, that’s Kara’s story to tell.”

 

“I understand.” Lena puts a hand on Lucy’s shoulder and then turns to close the dishwasher which is now full. 

 

Lena sets the towel down and Lucy thanks her before cleaning the rest of the kitchen. She leaves the kitchen quietly, walking down the hallway to Kara’s office. The closer she gets the louder muffled shouts become. When she’s directly in front of the door she can hear two voices shouting and one unfamiliar voice trying to calm them. Lena puts one hand on the handle, jiggles it a little to get the people’s attention inside, and then she knocks twice.

 

“Come in.” Kara shouts, a bit muffled by the door. 

 

Lena slowly swings the door open to see Alex standing by a white board covered in photos and a map that she doesn’t remember being there when she first came to Kara’s office. The police officer from before is sitting in the seat across from Kara’s desk that isn’t occupied by Lena’s purse. The exploding file from before is on Kara’s desk, open and in disarray. Kara is standing in the back corner by her window with her head in her hand. 

 

“I’m going to head out now.” She comes fully into the room, closing the door behind her. 

 

She grabs her purse and walks around Kara’s desk. She ignores Alex and the police officer, her hand goes to Kara’s upper arm and she strokes her up and down. Kara slowly moves her hand away from her head and looks up to smile and Lena. Lena smiles and goes for a hug, Kara wraps her arms around her and the two stay embraced for a bit before she pulls back. Kara hesitantly lets her go.

 

“I’m sorry about this, this was a bad lunch.” Kara says quietly, as if trying to keep their conversation secret from the others in the room.

 

Lena matches her quiet pitch, “It’s okay, I had a fantastic time. Lucy and I had fun washing the dishes. Maybe next time you can wash my dishes.”

 

Kara laughs with a smile, “It’s a deal.”

 

“Okay. Bye, Kara. I’ll text you when I get home.” Lena smiles and steps away.

 

“Please do.” Kara’s smile grows as Lena walks away.

 

Alex moves so Lena doesn’t have to squeeze between her and the whiteboard. Her curiosity gets the better of her and she looks up at the map, a highlighted rectangle that connects six or seven push pins holding up images of burned down buildings.

 

“Hey are these the most recent fires?” Lena points to the span of images.

 

Alex glares at Kara and they both remain silent. The voice that speaks is from neither of them, but from the police officer. “Yeah, from the last three months.”

 

“Maggie.” Alex sighs out her name.

 

“Interesting.” Lena says as she runs one hand over each of the images.

 

“How so?” The police officer, Maggie, stands from her seat and walks over to Lena’s side.

 

Soon Alex and Kara join her on her other side and all four of them are looking at the covered whiteboard. Lena runs her finger along the highlighted rectangle on the map to double check her information.

 

“This is District 17B of the city. Luthor Corp owns every building in this district but Morgan Edge had recently put up a bid to buy it off of us. He wanted to build new highrises, we, well I, told him no because there were already residential buildings within the district and we are working on a plan to change those buildings to more affordable housing.” Lena digs through her purse before pulling out a small calendar, she opens it to November and points to the second week. “Yeah, he has until here to bring a counterproposal.”

 

Kara rubs at her chin before nearly shouting, “Oh my god!”

 

“What?” Alex rubs her ear that’s closest to her sister.

 

“All the fires so far have just been abandoned or active residential buildings. What if he’s burning them in order for his proposal to work? No more residential buildings means nothing stops him from buying the district from under Luthor Corp.” Kara grabs a marker from the whiteboard tray and starts circling other residential buildings in District 17B.

 

“I wouldn’t put it past him, but that’s a big accusation.” Lena puts her small calendar away.

 

“We need evidence,” Maggie speaks up before turning around and rummaging through the large folder on Kara’s desk.

 

Alex walks over to the desk and begins looking with her, Kara walks up to Lena with a smile. “Want to stay and help us crack an arson case?”

 

“We don’t know it’s arson yet!” Alex growls at her sister.

 

Kara waves her hand at her sister in disregard and then looks back at Lena expectantly. “So?”

 

“I don’t have anything else to do today, so why not?” Lena sets her purse down and the room starts to dive into chaos as they start to actively look for anything implicating Morgan Edge. 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope you liked this chapter, i felt good writing it. 
> 
> side note, ill be posting a one-shot based on lena being an author and accidentally going on a date with alex when she wanted to go on a date with kara. so look out for that sometime soon.
> 
> and as always you can get chapters a week early on patreon.


	8. trust your heart if the seas catch fire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Would now be a bad time to mention I’ve been lurking in the shadows?” Lucy’s voice shakes Kara from her thoughts.
> 
> Kara lifts her head and rubs at her cheeks, no tears fell but she feels like she needs to rub the sadness from her face. She scoots over as Lucy approaches and the two sit on the weight bench. Lucy puts an arm around Kara and they lightly rock back and forth in a temporary silence.
> 
> “It may not be a date but she’s doing this for you. Sam told me how she spent days on the proposal to make sure it’s perfect. I think the fact she’s doing it says a lot more than a date ever could.” Lucy rubs up and down Kara’s arm to soothe her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i have no clue if i hate or like this chapter, but anyway, next chapter is the firefighter games! sorry for the long wait, thank you to those still invested in this story.

Lena comes into work days later with a headache. Her entire mind jumbled from days of helping Kara with the investigation to calling in favors at other companies to try and look inside Edge’s operations. She was exhausted, absolutely drained. She had no intention of doing any demanding work as she would not be in the right state of mind to use machinery in the hospital. But the world had other plans.

 

She walks out of the operating room after four hours of surgery for one of her young patients. Her temples throb with pain due to lack of sustenance and poor sleep. She leans over the sink in the resident bathroom, her stomach tosses and turns and her head aches. She turns the sink on and cups her hand beneath the running water, she splashes her face and it wakes her up but does nothing for the aches and pains.

 

As she leaves the bathroom she’s about to make her way to the cafeteria until her pager buzzes. She groans internally and pulls the device from her pocket. Staring back at her are a set of numbers she hates receiving.  _ 044163\.  _

 

She makes her way through the halls and passageways to the elevators and then another hall to her office. She opens the door, fully expecting an enraged mother with her arms crossed and a look of disappointment, but is only met with a panting grey mass with a strap around his neck and a box dangling from it. 

 

Lena closes the door and locks it before kneeling down. “Smokey, here.” 

 

The dog immediately prances over to Lena, he gives her his pitbull smile and then sits back down as she runs a hand through his short fur. She unclips the strap from around his neck and sets the box on the floor. His harness is wrapped around his back and legs with a piece of paper tucked between it and the fur. 

 

_ Kara said you don’t eat when working and made me promise to bring you something. Big boy has already eaten but there are treats in there if you want to give him some. Also, I’m stealing Sam for the day.  - Lucy _

 

Lena smiles and puts the note in her pocket before picking up the box. She walks over to the couch in the back of her office. Smokey happily leaps onto the couch next to her and lays down, his head rubbing into her thigh. She looks at him with a look of shock. 

 

“No. I’m sorry but this is not your mother’s house.” Lena starts to push the mass of grey off the couch but he’s adamant about his spot next to her. “Fine.”

 

She pulls the box onto her lap and opens it to reveal a Chinese takeout box next to a bag of dog treats. With a content smile, she breaks the chopsticks apart and pulls the takeout box and puts the main box down. She’s only two bites in when her door is assaulted by rapping knuckles. Lena puts her lunch on the side table, she wipes the sides of her mouth with her fingers before wiping them on a napkin.

 

“Come in.” She turns to pet between Smokey’s ears. 

 

Her door opens to reveal the devil herself walking into Lena’s office. She walks to the chairs opposite to Lena’s desk and sets her purse down before taking off her coat, setting it on top of the purse. Lillian pulls the sunglasses from her eyes and clasps them closed as she tosses them on top of her coat. Smokey slips off of the couch and walks up to Lillian, his nose brushing against her fingertips as he tries to inspect her.

 

“Lena why am I once again hearing about some mutt in my- Absolutely not!” Lillian waves at Smokey to go away and ends up slapping him lightly. 

 

He lowers his head with sadness and retreats to Lena. He turns his back on Lillian and leans his head into Lena’s shoulder. Lena rubs at his neck and chest as he sits down. 

 

“Did the mean lady hurt you? You’re okay.” She pointedly looks at her mother from over Smokey’s head.

 

“What did I tell you? I specifically told you not to do this. Even worse you take your butch firefighter to the banquet with you. Did you know I had to hear it from Veronica Sinclair-”

 

“I don’t care what Veronica did or what she said. Kara was a delight at the banquet and handle everything with poise and grace. She also congratulated me on winning both awards, the first time it’s ever been done.” Lena sighs and focuses back on Smokey who has regained his pitbull smile and is wagging his tail. 

 

“Well, where is she? This Kara, when do I get to meet her? If she was so poised and graceful maybe she can arrange her own fundraiser and not have you doing her bidding.” Lillian walks to Lena’s side table and grips the Chinese takeout box in her hand. “God is this what the dog eats? Absolutely full of fats and sugars.” 

 

Lena watches her mother toss it in the trash can. “You’ve already met Kara, you just were too rude to pay attention. Does that mean the board agreed to a fundraiser?”

 

“Yes. We’ll be selling some things and auctioning things off along with serving dinner and asking an entrance fee. Now for the last time can we get this mutt out of here.” Lillian points to Smokey who turns to her as if he knows the subject has fallen back onto him. 

 

“He’s already made friends here so I think he should stay and if the issue is that he’s a mutt I would call Kara for his breeding papers but she found him in a burning building. She has more heart than most people these days.” She lifts the fat of his jowls and makes his smile even goofier as she looks to her mother. 

 

“One. He has one chance. Anything goes wrong and he’s out of here.” Lillian grabs her things and leaves. She slams the door shut and leaves Lena alone with Smokey.

 

Lena looks back at him and he looks at her, she gives him an exaggerated look of unhappiness. “Someone is not a happy camper.” 

 

He continues to pant and smile at Lena who just smiles back before sighing and resigning to her fate. She pats her lap and Smokey falls to his stomach, sprawling out on the couch with his head in Lena’s lap. 

 

―

 

Kara’s raising a bar with multiple weights on each end when she hears her phone ring. She hears Lena’s distinct ringtone and her focus waivers, her hand slips and in an instant she feels her chest being crushed as the weight bar falls onto her. Her hand, extended to grab her phone, is locked under the weight of the bar. She groans in pain, it ends up becoming loud enough to be considered a scream as she tries to shift her arm. 

 

She sees Alex rush in from into the door of the station’s gym. Alex stops in her tracks and her brows furrow as she takes in the sight of her sister underneath the metal bar with an extended arm constrained from moving. 

 

“Do I even want to know?” Alex asks as she approaches Kara.

 

Kara groans out once more. “Please just help me.” 

 

Alex walks over to Kara and lifts the unsupported side of the bar. Kara lifts the other side with her arm and the two of them put the bar back into place. Kara sits up on the weight bench, she pushes her left hand against her right shoulder and rolls her right arm around. She can already feel a bruise forming as she feels pain by just touching her shoulder. She waves Alex off and leans over to grab her phone. She grips her phone and unlocks it to read through Lena’s messages. 

 

_ Hey, Thank you for the lunch.  _

_ I have something we should talk about.  _

_ Whenever you feel like it. _

 

Alex gives her a glance and Kara shrugs her off, she stands from the bench with a deep breath and then clicks Lena’s contact. The ringtone starts and she begins pacing the small gym that doubles as a locker room. 

 

“Kara?”

 

“Hey! You wanted to talk?” Kara releases a soft sigh, smiling as they speak. 

 

“Yeah, um, Thank you. For lunch and the company.” Kara can hear a soft yawn from Smokey through the line. 

 

“Of course. Anything else?” Kara bites her lip as she steps over weights. 

 

“Yes, the board got back to me on something. Remember that firefighter fundraiser I told you about?” Lena’s voice sounded unsure of herself and it made Kara ache to speak to her in person.

 

“Oh, Lena it’s okay. The station is okay.” Kara feels a lightness in her chest just at the fact Lena cared so much. 

 

Lena chuckles on the other end of the line, “No, Kara it got accepted. It’s going to be in a few days. I was wondering if you would come to the fundraiser?”

 

“I- I would love to go to the fundraiser with you!” Kara’s smile brightens tenfold. 

 

“Oh, yeah. I mean, yeah you could go with me. But also like, as a firefighter so the people donating can talk to you and see that their money is being put to good use. The others at the station can come as well, the more the merrier.” Lena clarifies and Kara can feel her smile drop a thousand watts. 

 

“Oh, okay. Yeah, I’ll round everybody up.” Kara nods her head and bites her lip. 

 

“Thank you, it’s going to be this Saturday, I hope that works for you. I mean, all of you. The station.” Lena clears her throat a bit. 

 

Kara sits on the bench and leans her elbows on her knees. “Yeah, that sounds perfect. I’ll see you Saturday. Bye, Lena.”

 

“Bye, Kara.” Lena’s voice is quieter than before, barely louder than a whisper. 

 

Kara hangs up and tosses her phone onto her bag a few feet away. She rubs at the back of her neck and lowers her head. She lets out a sigh, the heart in her chest clenches and she can feel her chest ache. She’s torn as she knows in one hand Lena set the fundraiser up only after hearing about Kara’s torn jacket and yet she asked for the whole station to join her. It’s difficult when she wants an event for the entire station to just be a time for Lena and herself. 

 

“Would now be a bad time to mention I’ve been lurking in the shadows?” Lucy’s voice shakes Kara from her thoughts. 

 

Kara lifts her head and rubs at her cheeks, no tears fell but she feels like she needs to rub the sadness from her face. She scoots over as Lucy approaches and the two sit on the weight bench. Lucy puts an arm around Kara and they lightly rock back and forth in a temporary silence. 

 

“It may not be a date but she’s doing this for you. Sam told me how she spent days on the proposal to make sure it’s perfect. I think the fact she’s doing it says a lot more than a date ever could.” Lucy rubs up and down Kara’s arm to soothe her. 

 

“Yeah, yeah.” Kara nods her head in half-hearted agreement.

 

―

 

Kara walks out of the  _ backseat _ of Alex’s car. She has a frown plastered on her face and her brows are furrowed. She watches Alex open the passenger door for her date. Her date, that she  _ forgot _ to mention until Kara asked for a ride since her car was in the shop. 

 

_ “Were you just going to come to the fundraiser with a girlfriend and hope no one would notice?” Kara’s voice was frustrated and her arms crossed in front of her chest.  _

 

_ Alex sighs and rolls her eyes. “I wasn’t expecting anyone to join us and I was going to introduce her to everyone there. That way it’s not awkward if she comes to the bar one night. And she’s not my girlfriend.”  _

 

_ “But I’m your sister!” Kara stomps her foot in frustration.  _

 

_ “I know! That’s why I was going to introduce you to her first!” Alex groans as they argue in Kara’s living room, the car still on and Alex’s date waiting in the garage. “Can we go, have a good night with friends to support the station and argue about this latter?”  _

 

_ Kara sighs, “I guess.”  _

 

_ “Thank you.” _

 

She tried to put on a smile, but her thoughts just kept rolling back to jealousy. Her plan was to be around Alex most of the night, to hang on her sister as an excuse for avoiding Lena. Now her sister has a date and she’s alone. She tries to shove the thoughts into the back of her mind. The words Lucy spoke in the gym were true but her heart didn’t like that either. 

 

When she’s standing at the entrance to the hospital and reaching for the invitation Lena sent them all she has half a heart to just turn away, to go home. She’s in the middle of taking a step back when she sees her. Lena’s away from the crowd, standing on the sidelines as she scans through the crowds that enter the hospital. Kara watches as Lena finds Alex and her face partially lights up but then Alex shrugs her shoulders at something and Lena’s face drops. Kara steps forward and pulls out her ticket, shoving into one of the worker’s hands. 

 

The doors slide open and she steps in with the most recent crowd of guests. Her eyes stay trained on Lena, Lena’s eyes stay scanning the incoming crowd. Kara smiles when their eyes meet, every little frustration and anger drowns in light as she sees Lena’s eyes brighten as much as Kara’s. Kara pushes her way out of the crowd to meet Lena. 

 

As soon as her arms are around Lena everything melts, the drowning frustration and anger die off and are replaced with warmth and happiness. She pulls back but only far enough to look at Lena, her arms are still on her waist.

 

“You look, wow.” Kara takes in Lena’s black gown with a tail following on the floor, the entire dress flows like a waterfall down Lena’s body and Kara’s mesmerized. 

 

“And you look very handsome, suits seem to, well, suit you.” Lena’s hand goes to Kara’s tie, she pushes it straight a bit and the two just stand in silence as they take each other in. 

 

It’s the loud tap of a microphone that makes them break the trance they find themselves in, they turn to face the stage. Kara keeps one hand around Lena’s waist, keeping her close as they walk forward towards the tables and chairs. Lillian stands on stage and is beginning the auction portion of the fundraiser. Kara couldn’t care less when Lillian’s eyes find hers only to glare and continue reading her announcements. She walks Lena over to the few back tables her station seems to have commandeered. 

 

Kara pulls out Lena’s seat before pushing it in a bit, she finds her own seat next to Alex and Lena. James is in the middle of telling a story about a recent fire when Sam notices their presence.

 

“Took you two long enough!” Sam eagerly says as she reaches across the table to take Lena’s hand. 

 

Kara clenches her jaw at the action, a part of her boils with something indescribable as Sam’s thumb rubs against the back of Lena’s hand. “Yeah, I misplaced my ticket but it was all good.”

 

Her tone is tense and Lena must notice because she recoils her hand from Sam and places it on Kara’s upper arm, an nonverbal question. Kara turns and smiles at Lena and it seems to ease Lena’s concern because she brings both of her hands onto the table as she looks at the three option menu. 

 

“Fuck, this costs more than rent for a month.” Lucy exclaims next to Sam, she has her menu turned toward the group and is pointing at the four digit price tag. The firefighters lose interest when they see the price and they all put their menus down.

 

“Good thing this fundraiser is for you and you don’t have to pay for your meals.” Sam says as she kisses Lucy on the cheek. 

 

Lucy’s enthusiasm is reinvigorated as Sam tells her the food is free. Kara herself is already back to looking at the dishes and deciding which one she wants, her mouth watering at the possibilities. She doesn’t pay attention to the auction in front of her which draws the entire table’s attention on the next item.

 

“Kara.” Alex kicks her under the table.

 

“Ow! What?” Kara, still a bit frustrated at her sister turns to see Alex pointing to the stage. 

 

Lillian is on stage with another woman who is slowly flipping through an old calendar. Specifically the Women’s Edition of their 2014 calendar. The girl on stage flips to September where Kara is in just her jacket and boots, her unmentionables covered barely as she lifts a weight bar. 

 

Lena’s in the middle of a sip of her water when she sees it and water sprays into the center of the table. Kara’s instantly grabbing a napkin and helping her clean up, apologies spill from her mouth.

 

“I am so sorry. I thought all of those were destroyed.” She looks to Lucy who was in charge of that particular photoshoot. 

 

Lucy looks at Kara with a roll of her eyes, “Yeah, the leftover copies were destroyed, a few people still bought the damn thing. How she got her hands on one, I couldn’t tell you.” 

 

Kara puts her head in her hands with a slight groan. The entire table bursts into laughter, the entire table except for Lena. Kara lifts her head from her hands and looks at Lena who is still staring at her plate with an unreadable expression. 

 

“Are you okay?” Her voice is barely heard over the uproar of laughter at their table. 

 

Lena nods her head quickly, “Yeah, Yes. I just, I guess I just assumed firefighter calendars weren’t a real thing. But if they were, I didn’t picture you ever doing something like that.”

 

Kara’s taken a back for a moment. “Like what? It’s not like I’m naked.”

 

“No, Kara that’s not what I meant. I just mean the message it sends is…” Lena cocks her head to both sides a couple of times.

 

“There’s no message. If there is it should be that women should be comfortable with their bodies. It’s not like you need to worry about it, it’s my face.” Kara’s words are laced with poison.

 

Lena opens her mouth, thinking before she speaks this time. “But you want to have a professional image of yourself and professional’s don’t typically stand nearly in the nude for a calendar.”

 

“It’s my image, you don’t need to concern yourself with it. It’s not like we’re dating.” Kara stands, her chair making a horrendous sound as it skids against the floor. She tosses her napkin onto the plate in anger before turning around and stomping off. 

 

Lena turns in her chair to go after her but a hand reaches across where Kara sat and Alex’s head is shaking in disagreement. “Let her go and calm down.” 

 

Lena sighs and sits forward again, a hand on her forehead as she berates herself. Her mother got into her head. Her mother who somehow found this one very unprofessional image of Kara that is apparently rare to find as Lucy stated. Her mother who already thinks Lena should be married off to some man and live out her days as a bitter housewife. 

 

She looks back up and they’ve already moved on to another auction item, calendar long gone and forgotten about. She wants to yell at something. More specifically she wants to yell at someone, someone being her mother. She tries to keep her attention back on the table.

 

Across from her Sam leans over to Lucy and whispers in her ear and they break for a second, Lucy shrugs her shoulders and then leans into Sam’s ear and whispers something. Lena’s about to turn to see if she can find Kara but then Lucy is clearing her throat.

 

“Hey Lena, next weekend the station is taking part in the annual Service Workers Games.” Lucy starts talking and everyone’s eyes are on her.

 

Alex pipes up before Lucy can continue. “Do you really wanna do this after the stunt Kara just pulled?” 

 

Lucy waves Alex off, “Kara’s being dumb. Anyway, these games are taking place at the Nation City Park. It’s a whole thing. All the stations come together to kick each others asses in some sports, the police stations come out also,” Lucy points to Alex’s date who has been rather quiet and sticking close to Alex. “Sometimes some paramedics come out and substitute if a team needs an extra set of hands. That and a brawl or two usually breaks out and they’re great at the after part of brawls.”

 

“Okay?” Lena questions what Lucy’s getting at.

 

Lucy smiles and sits up straighter. “So you’ll come with Sam to the games?”

 

“Oh, um.” Lena looks over her shoulder to see Kara at the makeshift bar and speaking to the bartender. 

 

“Kara will definitely want you there. She’s just been a little frustrated the past few days. She needs to let off some steam and she’ll be fine.” Lucy leans back in her chair as she takes a sip of wine. 

 

“Sure, I’ll go with Sam.” Lena nods her head, as much as she wants to go with Sam her mind is already making plans to apologize to Kara for the way she spoke. 

 

She hates the feeling she has in the pit in her heart that’s been there since Kara left the table.  _ It’s not like we’re dating.  _ She sighs and finally a waiter comes around to them for their orders, she orders for Kara and looks back over her shoulder only to find Kara missing from the bar.

 

She sighs and goes to take a drink of water and wait for Kara’s return. 

 

―

 

Kara doesn’t return until Alex actually goes to find her, her food has been sitting for a good ten minutes and Alex seemed angry as she left. Lena sees Alex’s date become a little uncomfortable and so she moves a seat over and tries to get her attention.

 

“Hey.” The woman finally turns to Lena with a half smile. “Hi, Lena Luthor.”

 

The woman takes Lena’s extended hand and shakes it, “Maggie Sawyer.” 

 

“How long have you known Alex?” Lena takes the opportunity to move one seat closer so they are next to each other, she’s now in Alex’s seat. 

 

Maggie smiles a bit brighter, her body relaxing into the conversation. “Well, I just moved to National City recently, so about nine months. What about you and Kara?”

 

“Uh, four months, closer to five.” Lena mentally counts as she thinks back to seeing Kara in the burn ward.

 

“And already arguing like an old married couple.” Maggie smirks but it just presses on the pit in her heart.

 

“We, um, We’re not together. As you probably heard when she stormed off.” Lena motions behind her like the memory would replay behind her.

 

“I know. But I can get where Kara’s coming from. I also can get where you’re coming from. Big fancy family who don’t support you and puts pressure on a good public image versus smaller town girl who just wants to be herself and proud of it. Those two things don’t typically match.” Maggie takes a bite out of her chicken. 

 

Lena sighs. “I know, I shouldn’t have said what I said. I just, my mother pressures me to look a certain way and act a certain way and even though I don’t do so every time she asks it’s hard to unlearn those habits.”

 

“Tell Kara that.” Maggie puts a comforting hand on Lena’s knee. 

 

“Luthor, you better not be trying to steal my detective.” Alex’s voice breaks through their conversation. Maggie’s smile doubles to a full smile that seems more genuine than any smile Lena saw from her before. 

 

“Absolutely not.” Lena chuckles and slips out of Alex’s chair before walking around to her own.

 

As she sits, she catches Kara sitting down out of the corner of her eye. Kara’s eyes look redder than before and Lena’s heart clenches at the fact she could have caused that pain. She aches to reach out to comfort her but her hands grip her fork and knife instead of Kara’s hand. Kara starts to cut into her steak a bit.

 

“I told them medium rare, I hope that’s okay.” Lena whispers, her voice trembling as if she speaks too loud Kara may explode. 

 

Kara’s in the midst of putting a piece of meat in her mouth but she lowers it and gives Lena a sad smile, “It’s perfect. Thank you.”

 

Lena gives Kara a smile in return and the two go back to eating. The table is silent for a long while as they all eat. Kara nearly devours her food before anyone else finishes despite being the last to start eating. The table breaks into laughter when Winn gets sauce on his face and wipes everywhere except where it is, having James wipe it off with a napkin for him. Lena steals a glance at Kara every so often and she smiles when she sees Kara looking back at her multiple times. 

 

Lena receives a tap on her shoulder and she turns to see one of her mother’s minions standing behind her. She nods her head and the minion leans down to whisper in her ear. 

 

“We are behind a few thousand dollars for the Luthor family to match the money.” Lena notices he raises his voice so the whole table can hear but still pretends to be whispering. “Your mother was wondering if one of the firefighters would offer themselves as an auction item. A date night with a firefighter to meet the donation goal.”

 

Lena clenches her jaw,  _ the audacity _ . She turns to tell him she’ll pay for the rest of the money out of her own when Winn speaks up.

 

“Well, since Kara isn’t dating anyone why doesn’t she do it?” James slaps Winn in the arm, Winn yelps before rubbing the spot on his upper arm. 

 

Everyone’s eyes fall to Kara and she’s in the middle of taking a sip of beer when she notices the attention has turned to her. “Um, I mean, sure.”

 

Lena slowly turns her head to Kara who is looking right back at her. “It’s for the station. I’ll take one for the team.”

 

Lena wants to argue but the minion has already begun to pull Kara out of her seat and take her to the stage. Lena feels her jaw tighten, if she were to be frustrated even a fraction more than she is in this moment she thinks her teeth might break. 

 

She takes a deep breath at the reminder that it’s for the station, besides most of the people here are old white men with too much time on their hands. She decides not to pay attention. Sam on the other hand is not letting her disregard the situation, she feels Sam kick her across the table and her head lifts up to the stage. Lillian is standing next to Veronica Sinclair and the room is full of applause as Lillian gives one of Veronica’s hands to Kara, ushering them off stage. 

 

Lillian’s eyes fall to Lena across the room. “Thank you to Miss Sinclair for her generous donation of twenty thousand dollars. Her donation not only gets her a date night with National City’s finest but it puts us over our goal by nineteen thousand dollars.”

 

Lena thinks she breaks a tooth when she looks at the donation board. They were only a thousand off of the goal. Not multiple thousands, a single thousand. A price Lena would very much have been willing to pay if the alternative was Sinclair going out with Kara. Lillian dismisses everyone and makes her way down the stage, she walks right to their group and puts a hand behind Lena’s chair and Kara’s empty seat. 

 

“I hope the money earned tonight helps your station immensely. I cannot tell you how grateful I am to have such exceptional firefighters watching over this city.” Lillian bows lightly and turns to leave. 

 

Lena excuses herself and follows her mother to a hallway where she shouts, “What the fuck!”

 

“Language, Lena.” Lillian stops in her tracks, slowly turning around to face Lena. 

 

“Your little minion told me we were missing the mark by multiple thousands of dollars. Not one thousand. What the hell is your game? Why are you so scared of Kara that you see the need to separate us?” Lena crosses her arms over her chest. 

 

Lillian points at Lena with a manicured finger, “I  _ am not _ scared of your little stupid firefighter crush. I’m doing what is best for you. You seriously want to associate yourself with someone who flaunts their body for money and would bid themselves off on a date?”

 

“That image was from the past! She’s not the same person as she was. Even if she was, who cares? A woman should be proud of her body, and if she’s proud enough to put it on a calendar to support her career then so be it. And don’t act like you didn’t know Kara was going to be selfless and offer herself to be the date for the last auction. What, did you pay Winn to ask Kara to do it?” Lena could feel the water in the back of her eyes, she blinked to keep them at bay.

 

“Who is Will? No, I didn’t pay anyone anything. It’s simple math. That brunette came here with some short woman, they’re dating. The tall dark and handsome came with that weasel of a boy, dating. Lucy and Sam, already walked in on that once.” Lillian shudders. “Kara though, Kara did not come with you nor did she come with another date. So, Kara would be the only one who would do it because the others would have to run it by their partners and I doubt any of them would have agreed.”

 

Lillian turns back around and walks down the hall. Lena lets out a muffled yell as she doesn't actually open her mouth and leans against the wall of the hallway. When she’s sure she’s alone she lets her tears fall for just a moment as she holds herself against the wall. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> as always, like or comment and you can find me on tumblr @[canaries](http://canaries.tumblr.com/)


	9. the fire and the rose are one

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “No, no. It’s okay. What you do in your bedroom is entirely up to you.” Lena helps Kara lower the water bottle packs by a table under Station 13’s tent.
> 
> “In my bedroom?” Kara stands up and her brows furrow as she looks at Lena. “What exactly did Miss Sinclair tell you?”
> 
> “Kara, I don’t really want to repeat the details of,” Lena puts up both hands and two fingers on each to make air quotes, “how well you fucked her.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> happy new year!!

Kara stands in the field with her squad, they’re standing in a circle doing stretches. They each wear a uniform with Station 13 plastered across the chest and upper back. Each of them has their own numbers that have been assigned to them. Her left arm is pulled across her chest as her right-hand puts pressure on the elbow. Her legs are spread a bit as she puts weight on her left leg and leans to the left. They all switch stances when J’onn blows a whistle. 

 

They got to the park an hour before others, getting a headstart on stretching so they can practice as everyone else is stretching. Kara groans as she cracks her back with a forward stretch. The park has slowly filled with event workers who are setting up each of the competition areas. 

 

J’onn blows the whistle and they start a set of burpees, Kara is in the midst of dropping to a push-up stance when she hears the familiar clinking of Smokey’s name tag and vaccination tags. She leaps back up to a standing position and on her down squat she’s bombarded with the wriggling body of a grey-furred pitbull. He wriggles under Kara’s chest and to the other side of her before he prances up to her face and attacks her with his tongue. Kara chuckles as she tries to hold her position but Smokey wiggles in front of her and walks into her face, even tries leaping onto Kara’s back. 

 

“Lois, I thought you were watching the dogs?” Kara asks between laughs as Smokey has his front paws on Kara’s back and is resting his weight on her shoulder. 

 

The others turn and look to Kara, the entire station bursts into laughter as Smokey tries to pull himself on top of Kara. Kara’s arms shake with both of their weights. When he gets one of his hind legs up and plops down on Kara’s back her arms give out. She rolls over, picking up the wiggling ball of grey and he starts kicking his hind legs as he’s pulled off the ground. 

 

He squirms out of her hands and leaps back to the ground. Kara shakes her head and stands up. She turns the top half of her body and listens as her spine cracks all the way up to her neck. 

 

Lois comes over with Monster and Krypto, both behaving like perfect angels. “I am watching them, but Smokey had other ideas.” 

 

Kara smirks and looks at him as he just sits on the grass and starts panting, his tongue lolling to the side. “He just doesn’t like leashes when he’s got open space to run.” 

 

Kara untangles the leash that Smokey has on his harness and unclips it. She hands it back to Lois who slips it in her purse. The firefighters all gather around to start talking and to pet the dogs. Kara has a straight view from where she’s standing and looking over Winn’s shoulder of the parking lot, which is how Kara knows as soon as Lena and Sam arrive. 

 

Lena gets out of the passenger seat and pulls her purse over her shoulder. Her casual look is a pair of tight black pants with a grey blouse to match her grey shoes. Sam gets out of the drivers seat only to walk to the back door of her small Honda Civic and opens it to grab something from the back. Kara watches Lena look around until Lena’s eyes fall on her, more specifically the entire group, and Lena raises a hand in a wave. Kara starts to raise her hand with a smile until she thinks back on the fundraiser. 

 

_ “How could I be so stupid! It’s not like we’re dating. Seriously, Kara, you idiot. You don’t say that to the person you want to date.” She slaps her hand against a door in the small hallway she’s hidden herself in.  _

 

_ “If you break something, you’re paying for a new one and I doubt your firefighter paycheck will cover anything other than pens and paper in this facility.” The cold voice brings Kara’s heart into her stomach, the voice chilling her to the bone and building a dark pit in her chest.  _

 

_ Kara turns around to see Lillian Luthor with her arms in her coat pockets and one hip popped out as she stares at Kara. Kara wants to speak but Lillian’s hand is immediately in the air.  _

 

_ “I honestly do not care about whatever rebuttal you have concocting in your little head. I’m here to tell you something very important, about Lena.” Lillian stands up straight and walks forward, making both of them go deeper into the hallway.  _

 

_ Kara looks over Lillian’s shoulder in a panic, “Is she okay? What happened? I didn’t mean to upset her. Is she okay?” _

 

_ “Oh God, how does she not see how you are so annoying.” Lillian rubs at the bridge of her nose, “Lena is fine, or maybe not. I don’t really care. All I care about is her living up to her potential. Lena will, sadly, be running this company one day and she needs to have a good head on her shoulders. She cannot have that if she’s off mucking around with you.” _

 

_ “Mucking around? How dare–“ Kara steps forward, her finger ready to point accusingly at Lillian.  _

 

_ Lillian simply rolls her eyes and continues, “She needs to be focused and with someone who will keep up with her intellectually. Sadly there is still the whole lesbian issue but no matter, what I am trying to say is you need to stay away from my daughter. Cast her aside. Make her hate you, make her never want to interact with the firefighters of this city ever again.” _

 

_ Kara looks back over Lillian’s shoulder, hoping for a glimpse or an image of Lena. “Who Lena is with, romantically or platonically, is entirely up to her. As for her  _ lesbian issue _ , loving someone is not an issue and you need to learn that.” _

 

_ “Miss Danvers I don’t think you understand me, you will remove Lena out of your life or I will remove you.” Lillian stands a head above Kara and glares.  _

 

_ “I doubt Lena will let that happen.” Kara scoffs and pushes past Lillian, not touching the woman as she steps around her.  _

 

_ “Lena won’t know what will happen. One day you’ll be there, and the next, you won’t. Miss Danvers this can be done the easy way or the hard way. Did you know it’s rather easy to find out someone’s entire past life through google these days? I didn’t even need to hire a private investigator to get a little dirt on you. That calendar was just a taste.” Lillian reaches into her jacket and pulls out a folder and forcefully hands it to Kara.  _

 

_ Kara slowly opens it to see photos of her old house, her parents, the charred remains a few days after the fire was put out. She turns them over to see papers with report information.  _

 

_ “How would Lena feel when she finds out poor little Kara Danvers’ parents locked people up for trying to save this world. Alura, such a smart woman yet so blinded by greed and money. And your dear father Zor-el, a genius but used his gifts for machines to suck this planet dry of resources. You’re no better than Lex. Than Lionel. Than me.” Lillian pushes past Kara, purposely shoving Kara a bit as she walks by.  _

 

_ Kara looks into the files, skim reading them as she takes in this information. Her eyes start to well with tears and her back hits the wall, she sinks to the floor as she lets out silent sobs. She doesn’t even feel Alex wrapping her arms around her and shushing her to calm down.  _

 

Kara’s hand never makes it past her chest, she hides it and looks to the ground. She doesn’t see the look of disappointment on Lena’s face, she doesn’t see how Lena slowly lowers her hand and her smile falls to a frown. Kara turns when Lucy spots Sam and starts to jog over.

 

“Kara! Lena and Sam are here!” Lucy shouts over her shoulder before jogging off to meet her girlfriend. 

 

Kara looks at her feet then with a heavy sigh she walks to Lena and Sam. Alex and James follow her, she feels Alex’s hand on her shoulder. Kara just shakes her head to disregard her sister and Alex removes her hand. She stands about ten feet from the car and crosses her arms over her chest. 

 

“Hey could you guys help me with the ice chest? Lucy said you guys like lemonade and my mom’s lemonde is the best in the world.” Sam smiles as she peeks over the backseat door. 

 

James and Alex walk to the back of the car with Lucy and start to pull things out of the trunk. Kara stands and watches, her eyes looking everywhere except Lena. Which is how she doesn’t notice Lena walking up to her. 

 

“Hey.” Lena’s voice is soft and Kara can hear how Lena’s stepping on ice. “Is that, um, Maggie from the fundraiser?”

 

Kara looks over to where Lena is pointing, coming from the parking lot is Maggie in black jeans and a navy blue shirt, her badge hidden by a leather jacket. “Yeah, she was the cop who helped us put together some of the connections for the fires.”

 

“Oh! That’s why she looked so familiar at the fundraiser.” Lena points out.

 

Kara just smiles and nods and continues to watch her friends. 

 

“Um, we haven’t seen Smokey by the hospital lately. I mean, he’s not obligated to come by every day. I just wanted to make sure he’s okay.” Lena turns so she’s facing the car and not actually looking at Kara. 

 

Kara gives her a nod again, “He’s fine.” She tosses a thumb over her shoulder. “Lois is actually looking after him today because I’m competing.” 

 

“Oh good.” Lena nods her head and starts to sway on her feet, the air fills with awkwardness. 

 

“Listen, I’m sorry.”

 

“Kara, I’m sorry.”

 

They speak at the same time and Kara has to let out a small chuckle at the smile it brings to Lena’s face. Kara shakes her head and points to Lena. 

 

“Uh, you first.”

 

Lena nods and smiles. “I just wanted to apologize, you were absolutely right. I had no business judging you. You never once judged me for my family, I had no right judging you for your past.”

 

Kara lets out a heavy sigh. “It’s okay Lena, I should be apologizing. I blew up, I did stupid things when I was younger and it’s rather easy to find someone’s entire past life on google these days.”

 

Lena looks at her curiously before speaking again, “I suppose so. Either way, I’m sorry. We’re just friends, not like we’re dating.” 

 

Kara wants to punch herself when she hears her own words used again. She doesn’t know what to say and luckily she doesn’t have to say anything as James lifts a 24 pack of water bottles into Kara’s arm with a _ ‘Carry this please’ _ on his lips. 

 

Kara readjusts the pack in her hands as he sets another one on top of it. She smiles when Lena lets out a little chuckle. Alex and James come back with ice chests and other supplies. Kara looks over Alex’s shoulder to see Lucy leaning behind the backseat door while Sam stands behind her. 

 

Kara doesn’t follow Alex and James to the station’s tent, she looks on as Lucy leans back out of the backseat and holds a sleeping three year old in her arms. The child is asleep with a thumb in her mouth and head on Lucy’s shoulder. Sam has the largest smile on her face as she closes the back seat door for Lucy. 

 

“Is that-“

 

“Sam’s daughter, yeah. Her name’s Ruby.” Lena smiles and turns on her heel, Kara follows suit. “So, Veronica told me about your date.”

 

Kara groans and bites her lip in frustration. “Lena, I’m really sorry. I know you’re her friend acquaintance rival type thing.” 

 

“No, no. It’s okay. What you do in your bedroom is entirely up to you.” Lena helps Kara lower the water bottle packs by a table under Station 13’s tent. 

 

“In my bedroom?” Kara stands up and her brows furrow as she looks at Lena. “What exactly did Miss Sinclair tell you?”

 

“Kara, I don’t really want to repeat the details of,” Lena puts up both hands and two fingers on each to make air quotes, “ _ how well you fucked her _ .”

 

Kara lets out a bark of laughter and puts a hand on the folding table to her left as she leans over in laughter. At Lena’s obvious confusion she straightens up and wipes the non-existent tears from her eyes. 

 

“I didn’t fuck Veronica Sinclair. Hell, I barely spoke to her. I met her at the restaurant and, knowing how you two don’t get along, asked her if this was about getting some sort of revenge on you. When she didn’t say anything and couldn’t look me in the eyes I assumed I was right. So I left fifty dollars and told her I was sorry. I then went home and ate two tubs of Ben & Jerry’s Cookie Dough Ice Cream.” Kara looks at Lena with a wide grin. 

 

“Wait, you didn’t even go on the date with her.” When Kara shakes her head in disagreement Lena’s jaw opens in bewilderment. “Why? I mean, I understand you didn’t want to do something to hurt me but, you aren’t my girlfriend and you are single and Veronica was almost Time’s most beautiful woman last year.”

 

“Almost?” Kara questions. 

 

“Yeah, Diana Prince beat her.” Lena shakes her head, “Wait,  _ that’s _ what you questioned?”

 

Kara looks at the ground and looks back at Lena. “Lena, you are more important than any date and any almost most beautiful woman in the world. Besides, I’ve met Diana Prince, you’re ten times better.” Kara leans in, “Do not tell her I said that, she’ll kill me.” 

 

Lena feels the heat rush to her cheeks and lets out an awkward laugh as she brushes a loose hair behind her ear. “Thank you, Kara.”

 

Kara smiles and puts a hand on Lena’s arm. She hadn’t realized how close they had gotten during the conversation. She stares down at Lena’s lips and goes to wet her own when Lena’s lips barely part as Lena releases a heavy breath. 

 

_ One day you’ll be there, and the next, you won’t.  _

 

Kara removes her hand and leans down to grab her large Hydro Flask before pointing towards one of the main competitions. “I, uh, need to go sign in.”

 

Lena just nods her head and Kara walks past her. She lowers her head in regret and shakes it in frustration. To be strong enough to lift a 16-wheeler’s tire but not be able to be with Lena, a cruel irony the world has. 

 

—

 

Kara goes on to win the truck pull challenge, a harness strapped to her and a thick rope tied to the harness and a tractor truck. She comes in third at the tire flip, sighing with disappointment as she regroups with her friends but then smiling in happiness as everyone congratulates her. 

 

They watch on in excitement when Lucy does the wall climb, her arms and legs extending like a monkey as she climbs. Five rock climbing walls have been set up with two competitors on each. Lucy doesn’t get the lead until one of the firefighters from Station 10 slips and falls a few feet. She takes advantage and climbs faster in order to put distance between herself and the others. She rings the bell before anyone else and with that the firefighters slowly descend the walls. 

 

Kara and Lucy walk around with their shiny medals with an arm around each other. They wave to other competitors and other winners. They stop at a booth to cheer on a few kids who play with little rings and glass bottles. 

 

Kara untangles herself from Lucy and walks over to Lena who has been standing in the back for most of the day. She walks up and extends a hand to Lena before pulling her to the booth and handing a five dollar bill to the attendant. 

 

“Here.” Kara hands Lena half of the metal rings with a smile. 

 

Lena cocks an eyebrow. “What is this?”

 

“Oh please don’t tell me you’ve never played bottles.” Kara lets out a groan but her smile betrays her. 

 

“Lillian always said carnivals and fairs were distractions and a waste of money.” Lena shrugs her shoulders. 

 

Kara just shakes her head. “Okay, so here’s how it works. You throw the ring around the neck of the bottle.”

 

“That’s it?” Lena looks at the ring but Kara lets out another chuckle. 

 

Kara points over to the kids beside them. Each one takes a turns throwing the rings to the group of bottles. Lena watches as each ring gets tossed, all of them missing. Some settle between the glasses, some land half on and half off the bottle. Kara looks back at Lena with a pointed glance and Lena rolls her eyes. 

 

Lena takes three of the five rings Kara purchased and Lena turns to the side. She eyes Kara and then the bottles and back to Kara, without looking she tosses one ring. She hears as it clangs against the glass and then the clinking as the ring spins around the neck of the bottle. She looks at the bottles as she tosses the next two and they land around a neck each time. 

 

“Look at that!” The lady working the booth pulls a blue stuffed bear from the top of the prizes and she hands it to Lena. 

 

Lena looks at it oddly and hands it to Kara who puts her hands up in refusal. “I can win my own thank you very much.” 

 

Lena chuckles and holds the bear, waving a hand in the direction of the glasses. Kara smiles and starts to wave her arm with a ring between her fingers. She releases one and then the other in quick successions. Lena watches as the two rings miss the bottle necks and slip between bottles.

 

Lena looks back at Kara, her mouth dropped in shock, and she hands Kara the teddy bear. Kara grabs it and squeezes it against her chest. She mumbles a thank you under her breath and turns back to join the group who has moved down the path. 

 

As they walk down and continue to stop at booths or competitions they aren’t in; they all shuffle together and laugh and converse in fun. Kara never lets go of her blue teddy bear even when her hands fill with food and drinks as they make their way around the park. Lena stays at Kara’s side and Kara shows Lena a full fair experience. Lena’s lips become sticky with cotton candy and her hands are greased from hotdogs and fries. 

 

A loud bell rings around noon and Lena looks to Kara who is already bouncing with excitement. Lena listens as after the bells ring the speakers fill with a voice other than the low music that had been playing. 

 

“All final round Station Agility Competitors to the check-in station. All final round Station Agility Competitors.” 

 

Everyone turns to Kara with smiles and Lena looks on in confusion as Kara’s smile grows. “What’s happening?”

 

Kara grabs one of Lena’s hands and begins to walk with her down the path towards a row of booths. “It’s the final round of the Agility Competition!”

 

“And why are we excited about that?” Lena looks at the rest of the group, all buzzing with the same excitement as Kara. 

 

Kara turns on her heel and puts her hands on Lena’s shoulder, holding the bear under her chin. “Smokey and Monster have held the top spot off and on for the past four years.”

 

“You and Lucy are competing?” Lena quirks a brow.

 

Lucy comes leaping beside Lena, “Hell yeah we are!” 

 

Lena smiles as Kara settles by her other side and they all walk to the booths. Kara and Lucy lean down to check in with the officials. Lena walks away from the group to look at the dogs and owners in a fenced patch of grass. She watches as a young Rhodesian Ridgeback weaves through the practice weave poles as if the dog was just running straight through the poles. A Weimaraner clears an A-Frame in three bounds, practically leaping off the other side but still touching the contact zone. 

 

Kara places a hand between Lena’s shoulder blades to announce her presence. Lena looks back at her before looking back to the dogs and watches as each trainer practices and runs through obstacles with their dogs. 

 

Lucy walks up and hands Kara a large paper that Kara takes along with two clothing pins. The two of them pin the paper to their shirts below their chests. Lucy walks back to Sam and the others but Kara stays with Lena.

 

“Are you going to be okay when I go to compete?” Kara leans against one of the barriers then settles the hand from between Lena’s shoulder blades to her waist.

 

Lena tries to keep her cool but when Kara’s thumb starts to rub up and down she feels heat creep up her neck. “Um, yeah. Yeah, I’ll be okay. Sam will be there with me.” 

 

“Okay.” Kara doesn’t move her hand but she stops her thumb’s movements. 

 

Lucy shouts from where she’s standing with the group, “Kara! Lois is by the starting gate!”

 

Kara doesn’t stop looking at Lena, she just barely moves her head towards Lucy but her eyes stay on Lena. “Yeah, I’ll catch up.” 

 

The group starts to walk away and Lena points over to them with a stutter on her lips, “D- Do- Do you want to go get Smokey?”

 

When Lena’s voice reaches Kara’s ears whatever spell that was keeping their eyes locked is broken because Kara shakes her head and looks down at the ground. “Uh, yeah. Yeah, lets go get him.” 

 

Lena turns and walks with Kara but around the opposite side of the fenced-in agility course as the group walked. Kara puts her hand around Lena’s back as they walk. 

 

“I’m glad you came. I wanted to ask you myself but I was too hot-headed at the fundraiser. I’m sorry for that, again.” Kara looks down at her feet as they walk. 

 

Lena looks at her with a sad smile, “It’s all behind us Kara. I would never miss a chance to watch you.”

 

Kara looks up at Lena and raises a brow.

 

“I mean, watching you compete. I would never miss a chance to watch you compete and cheer you on.” Lena’s lips curl in as she tries to fix her statement. 

 

Kara nods her head with a perceptive smile. 

 

They finally make it to the gate and Lois has already handed Monster over to Lucy, Smokey sitting by everyone’s feet as he waits for Kara. Kara lets out a sharp whistle and Smokey’s head immediately pops up, he’s on his feet and races towards Kara. Kara chuckles when he leaps up at Kara and tries to nip at the teddy bear. Kara has to remove her hand from Lena’s side, to Lena’s slight displeasure, and she holds the teddy bear away from Smokey as the dog leaps up at Kara. 

 

Kara smiles, “Down.”

 

Smokey sits on his haunches and looks up at Kara with his trademark pitbull smile, tongue hanging slightly out of his mouth.

 

“Agility Competition Finals are starting, all competitors please go to the starting gate.” The speakers screech then turn back to quiet music. 

 

Attendants move to the starting gate to start taking names and letting competitors inside. Lucy gives Sam a kiss on the cheek and then walks Monster over to go into the fenced-in area. Smokey’s tail starts to slam against the ground as his excitement grows. Kara turns to Lena and holds out the teddy bear.

 

“Will you keep Blueberry safe while I compete?” Kara gives her a smile and shakes the bear in her hands. 

 

Lena’s lips crack wide open into a beaming smile, “Of course.”

 

Lena holds the bear in her arms and holds it against herself. She grips one of the little arms and makes the bear wave to Kara as Kara and Smokey walk into the arena. Kara waves back with a smile and then turns to the attendant. 

 

Sam walks over with the rest of the group and everyone finds a spot near the left side of the arena, all of them gathering around to get a look at the course set up for the finals. Sam nudges Lena with her elbow as she’s still holding Ruby in her arms. 

 

“Cute bear,” Sam smirks.

 

Lena rolls her eyes. “I’m just holding it for Kara until she’s done.” 

 

Sam hums, “Yeah but I saw you give it to Kara after the bottle stand.”

 

Lena ignores her and leans over the railing a bit to watch the first competitor step into the course. Sam leans closer to Lena to speak in a hushed whisper.

 

“When are you going to go for it?” Lena takes in a sharp breath, not expecting Sam to be so close.

 

Lena shakes her head, “After the fundraiser, probably never. I don’t think she’s interested in that way.”

 

“You need to see an optometrist, I think you’re going blind.” Sam chuckles to herself. 

 

Lena smacks Sam’s arm and Sam lets out a gasp of air in fake shock. “Don’t wake the baby!”

 

Lena laughs and shakes her head in disregardment. She turns back to face the course and watches as Kara and Smokey step up to the starting block. Their entire group erupts into claps and shouts. Lena side eyes Sam who is screaming just as much but Ruby hasn’t moved or woken a single bit. Her attention finds Kara and she sees Kara looking right at her as well, the two of them smile at each other and then Kara stands facing forward as she waits for the starting bell to sound. 

 

—

 

Lena and Kara sit across from each other on Lena’s couch. Lena’s legs are tucked underneath her, one arm stretches across the back of the couch and another one reaches for the glass of wine waiting on her table. Kara has one arm across the back of the couch with her other arm settled in her lap. Lena and Kara’s hands are playing with each other as they rest against the back of the couch. Lena twists and curls her fingers between Kara’s, the soft pads of Kara’s fingers rub soothing circles on Lena’s palm. 

 

“It’s getting late.” Kara’s voice is soft and Lena can see her trying to blink sleepiness from her eyes. 

 

Lena just hums in agreement and takes a sip of her wine. “I don’t think Smokey will be joining you on your adventure home.” 

 

The two of them turn to see Smokey heavily asleep and curled into a ball on Lena’s love chair. His head is resting on Kara’s blue bear. Kara lets out a soft laugh and Lena tilts her head to the side to admire the look of sleepy joy on Kara’s face. 

 

“I’ll just carry him down the stairs.” Kara shrugs her shoulders and then looks back to their hands intertwined. 

 

“Absolutely not,” Lena scoffs, “It’s over thirty flights and even if you took the elevator it would still be heavy to carry him outside and wait for the valet. You can let him stay here. Gives you a reason to come see me soon.”

 

Lena immediately wants to take it back, to shove her words back down her throat, but when she looks at Kara all she sees is a soft smile and a look of reciprocation. Lena leans forward, Kara slowly coming to meet her in the middle but when Lena’s about to press her lips to Kara’s lips Kara lowers her head. 

 

“Lena, I don’t want you to get in trouble.” Kara untangles her hand from Lena’s and brushes it against Lena’s cheek. 

 

Lena looks at her curiously. “In trouble with who?”

 

“I don’t want to hurt you.” Kara’s voice is barely a whisper, if they weren’t so close Lena would not have heard her. 

 

“Kara?” Lena uses her previously entangled hand to lift up Kara’s face. 

 

Kara lets out a heavy sigh, “My past is not all that great and I don’t want you to hear about it from anyone other than me but I’m not ready to share. It’s not that I don’t want to tell you, I do, but it can be exhausting.”

 

Lena understands Kara, she understands the pain of retelling a difficult past. It drains the joy and life from you even though it's just words. “I get it, you don’t have to say anything until your ready.”

 

“Lillian threatened to-”

 

“You’ve got to fucking kidding me.” Lena shakes her head and lets out an exasperated laugh. 

 

“I’m sorry?” Kara leans an inch back in confusion.

 

Lena keeps shaking her head before settling her hand on Kara’s neck. “Not you. I’m just so tired of my mother controlling everything. She’s already lived her life, she doesn’t get to live through mine. I just can’t believe she would do something so petty as to threaten you- Actually I can imagine her doing exactly that. She knows how much you’ve grown on me and how I feel about you and she’s afraid that if you feel the same she’ll lose whatever hold she has on me.”

 

Lena doesn’t realize she has exposed that she likes Kara verbally, she just keeps word vomiting but when Kara hears the last section she leans forward and presses a kiss to Lena’s lips. It starts off stiff, both of them not knowing what to do but as soon as Lena accepts the fact Kara is kissing her she runs her finger between the small hairs at the back of Kara’s neck. Her blunt nails scratch at Kara’s neck, causing her to let out a soft moan as they kiss. Kara’s lips open to Lena’s soft lips and they melt together as they figure out each other’s ticks, their mouths are soft and gentle against each other. Kara tastes like spearmint and sunshine, if sunshine had a taste it was Kara’s kiss. 

 

Kara pulls back an inch, Lena chases her for one last kiss before they break apart a bit farther. Kara smiles and it brings a smile to Lena’s face. 

 

“You were starting to sound like me,” Kara whispers, she gives Lena a chaste kiss. “I wanted to do that since I met you.”

 

Lena lets out a sigh in content, “Why didn’t you?’

 

Kara chuckles, “I don’t think kissing a doctor I just met is good patient etiquette.”

 

“Guess it just depends on the doctor,” Lena smirks.

 

Kara shakes her head with a smile on her face. Her eyes are drawn to the clock on the oven behind them. She lets out a heavy sigh.

 

“I really need to get going, I have an early shift tomorrow.” Kara starts to stand and Lena rises with her. 

  
The two of them walk to the door and as Kara opens the door she lingers in the door frame. “I will definitely see you soon. My doctor prescribed a daily dose of kisses.”

 

Lena throws her head back in laughter, “Oh, did she?”

 

Kara hums and nods her head enthusiastically. 

 

“You sure it’s not because your baby boy passed out on my chair.” Lena tosses a thumb over her shoulder. 

 

Kara’s smile grows impossibly wider. “I will definitely come by and pick him up in the morning before my shift.” 

 

“Drive safe, text me when you get home.” Lena stands on her tiptoes and presses a kiss to Kara’s cheek.

 

“Of course.” Kara kisses Lena’s cheek in return and then finally steps out of the doorway and down the hall. 

 

She repeatedly turns her head to eye Lena with a happy grin on her face. Lena waves all the way until Kara enters the elevator. She closes the door behind her and leans against it with a smile on her face. She kicks off of the wall and walks over to where she and Kara were resting. She picks up the wine glass and Kara’s water glass. When she empties them and sets them in the dishwasher she hears the faint sound of a whimper. As she walks to the couch again she sees Smokey shivering and hears him whimpering. Lena grabs the blanket off of the back of the couch and throws it over Smokey. He settles down and the whimpers fade off as his body warms up. 

 

“Goodnight Smokey.” Lena walks down to her bedroom.

 

She goes to close her door but thinks better of it in case Smokey wakes up and gets scared from the unusual surroundings. She changes into pajamas and as she pulls back the covers of her bed she hears her phone ding.

 

_ Home and safe. Goodnight Doctor Lena. _

 

Lena smiles and texts her reply before curling into her bed and falling asleep.

 

_ Goodnight Just Kara.  _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> we have one more fun chapter and then pain so... do with that information what you will. on another note, we're over half way done! this is by far the longest fic i've worked on and i still love it.
> 
> as always im [@canaries](https://canaries.tumblr.com) on tumblr


	10. how do you turn a forest fire like me so soft i turn into running water.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I really like your mom. I’m just scared.” Lena stands up and walks over to the kitchen island where her cold eggs sit. “But I can do this, I can do a relationship.”
> 
> She’s talking at Smokey but in reality, she’s trying to convince herself as she pops the eggs in the microwave to reheat them. Smokey lays at Lena’s feet as she waits for the eggs and she gives him a soft smile.
> 
> “I can do this.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is chapter 10 and 11 mixed together, sort of. I hope you enjoy! (and im sorry??)

Her face is stuck with a smile, the skies could open in a torrential downpour but her smile would stay. She’s on her way down the streets towards Lena’s apartment, her steps having a little more skip in them than usual. She smiles at random strangers who pass her by, waving to the little kids who smile in return. The walk from her apartment to Lena’s is roughly thirty minutes and she smiles the entire time. 

 

The doorman smiles at her as she walks through, the workers behind the large desk smile at her and wave. She spins in a quick circle while she waits for the elevator. She enters it as a mother and her child are leaving and Kara gives the small child a massive smile before waving goodbye. 

 

She doesn’t complain when the elevator becomes far too cramped, she keeps her smile on and leaves when they reach Lena’s floor. She makes a display of a bow when she leaves the elevator and it leaves the other elevator riders looking on with confusion and some smiles. She stops in front of Lena’s apartment and raps on the door with a joyful rhythm before slipping her hands back into her pockets. 

 

Lena opens the door and steps aside for Kara to come inside, “Someone is in a very good mood.” 

 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Kara closes the door for Lena before she gently leads Lena towards her, leaning her head down for a soft kiss. 

 

“Hi.” Lena breathes after they separate.

 

Kara’s response is a soft hum before she wraps her arms around Lena and holds her in a hug. “How are you?”

 

Lena lets out a chuckle at the embrace. “I’m well. It hasn’t even been twelve hours Kara nothing big has happened.”

 

“I beg to differ. Less than twelve hours ago we both admitted to loving each other.” Kara lets go and skips over to the kitchen where she sees Lena’s breakfast waiting. “You haven’t eaten yet?”

 

“Wait, what did you say?” Lena’s voice is caught in her throat and she coughs to clear it.

 

Kara turns back toward Lena, “You haven’t eaten yet?”

 

“No before that.” Lena walks up to Kara, folding her arms around herself and keeping Kara on the opposite side of her of the furniture. 

 

“I beg to differ?” Kara looks at her with genuine confusion.

 

Lena shakes her head, becoming frustrated with Kara. “No, between those two things.”

 

“We both admitted to loving each other?” Kara shuffles the plate towards Lena, “You should really eat, I think your brain’s not getting enough nutrients.”

 

“No,” Lena pushes the plate back. “You love me?”

 

Kara stops exploring the kitchen to sit on one of Lena’s bar stools. “I mean, I don’t know. Isn’t that what people do in relationships, they love each other?” 

 

“Well, usually you start out liking someone and then build love you don’t just jump into love.” Lena sits at the farthest bar stool, leaving a seat between her and Kara. 

 

Kara looks perplexed, examining her fingers and hands, not making eye contact with Lena. “I’m sorry it’s just that’s what I thought we were talking about last night.” 

 

“I mean, we were talking about a relationship but not love.” Lena bites her lip, she tightens the grip she has on herself, her heart beats a thousand beats a minute and she can hear a ringing in her ears. 

 

Kara stands up and shakes her head, “Sorry. I guess we should have been more clear last night. I’ll just get Smokey and go.”

 

Kara whistles before she listens for the clanking of his tags on his collar and the clicking of his claws against Lena’s hardware floor. She doesn’t hear Lena come up behind her but she feels a hand on her lower back rubbing up to her neck. 

 

“No, Kara it’s not that. You just caught me off guard. Please don’t go.” Lena pleads with Kara, one arm still wrapped around herself but another on Kara’s neck.

 

Smokey comes down the hallway and Kara leans down to put on his harness, moving out of Lena’s touch. “I think maybe I got the wrong signs. I thought you wanted to be together.”

 

“I do.”

 

Kara stands suddenly, Lena backsteps in order to not run into her. “Then what’s happening? I’m so confused. You’re closing yourself, metaphorically and physically.”

 

When Kara points to Lena’s closed body Lena becomes self-conscious and she drops her arms. She feels even more vulnerable than before and she aches to hold herself but her arms stay at her side. She wants to yell at Kara to just stop being stubborn but she knows its not Kara. Kara has a large heart and its not her fault Lena can’t love people. 

 

“I’m sorry, Kara. It’s just a lot and I need time.” Kara deflates once more as Lena talks. 

 

Kara lets out a soft sigh, “You don’t need to do this alone, I can help. If it’s easier I just won’t tell you I love you.”

 

Lena shakes her head and waves her hands in front of Kara, “No. No. No. Kara, I don’t want you to have to lie about your feelings, I’m just not used to this.”

 

“What?” Kara questions her and rubs at her temples. 

 

Lena lets out a sigh, “People always want something and their attraction to me is typically only an attraction to my name and money. I’m not used to having people who want to be near me for me.”

 

Kara’s face drops and Lena can see the moment Kara realizes Lena hasn’t loved anyone. “Lena, You deserve people who want you for you. You’re amazing and wonderful.”

 

Kara starts to raise her hand to Lena’s cheek but the back of her pants start to buzz and both of them let out a heavy sigh. Kara pulls her phone from her pocket and slides to unlock it. 

 

“Shit.” Kara’s energy has done a 180 as she reads the report on her phone. “Two buildings caught fire, I have to go. I hate to do this but can Smokey stay here with you?” 

 

Lena nods her head and walks Kara to the door. “Yeah, of course.”

 

Kara takes a step out of the door and then turns and leans to put a kiss on Lena’s cheek. “We can keep talking when I’m done, okay? I’m not letting you get off the hook, I still want to be with you, Lena. I’ll call tonight.” 

 

Lena smiles and her hand reaches up to rub the part of her cheek that was just kissed gently. As Kara starts down the hall Lena leans outside of her door. “Please, be careful!”

 

Kara gives her a mock salute and ducks into the elevator. Lena closes the door to her apartment and leans back against the door, she lets out a long sigh and stares down at Smokey who is waiting patiently where Kara was standing. He gets up and trots over to Lena only to paw at the door, dragging his leash along the floor. Lena starts to frown as he whimpers out, confused why his mom just left. 

 

“She’ll be back, buddy.” Lena kneels down and rubs at his cheeks,

 

Smokey leans forward and nuzzles at Lena’s cheek before giving her sloppy kisses. 

 

“No!” She exclaims with a chuckle. “Smokey, no, down.” 

 

Her command has no authority behind it and Smokey takes it as an invitation to put his paws on her knees and get closer. Lena dissolves into a fit of laughter and when Smokey finally relents she just smiles at him.

 

“I really like your mom. I’m just scared.” Lena stands up and walks over to the kitchen island where her cold eggs sit. “But I can do this, I can do a relationship.”

 

She’s talking at Smokey but in reality, she’s trying to convince herself as she pops the eggs in the microwave to reheat them. Smokey lays at Lena’s feet as she waits for the eggs and she gives him a soft smile. 

 

“I can do this.”

 

―

 

“I can’t do this!” The woman shouts from the window.

 

Kara’s hands are extended and she’s at the end of the ladder, her safety harness won’t let her lean any further and the woman is a good five feet away still. She motions for the woman to come towards her. 

 

“I just need you to step onto the balcony, okay? I promise, I will catch you.” Kara pleads with the woman as she still tries to exceed her harness’ limits. 

 

“I’m scared.” She looks over the balcony and Kara bites the inside of her cheek because that always makes it worse. 

 

“Fuck it.” Kara unlatches her harness, ignoring the faraway screams of Lucy down at the base of the ladder. 

 

Kara takes the three extra steps on the excess rungs of the ladder. She extends her arms again. “I just need you to lean out okay, you don’t have to jump. Just lean out to me, okay?” 

 

The woman finally nods her head and starts to get on the balcony’s edge. The railing isn’t thick, it’s similar to a fence with thin metal poles half a foot apart all around. The woman gets one leg over and then stops, Kara takes her front foot and sets it on the final rung. She feels the ladder lurch forward before correcting itself. The woman slips her other foot around but now she’s facing with her back to Kara. 

 

“Just one step at a time and then you’ll be down before you know it.” Kara’s voice is calm but she can feel her thighs shaking at the tension and weight she’s putting on her legs. Her brow catches a drop of sweat and Kara shakes her head to get rid of the obstruction hanging above her eye. 

 

The woman has herself half turned around and Kara keeps nodding her head and encouraging her as she turns. When her back is to the apartment and she’s facing Kara Kara lets out a sigh of relief and gives the woman a little smile. The woman slowly reaches one arm out and Kara can almost make it to her. Their fingers miss by inches and the woman quickly puts her hand back against the railing to support herself. 

 

“Just push off, okay? I’ll catch you.” Kara starts to lean forward again with one hand on the edge of the ladder and the other extended to her, she can feel her muscles stretch and pull as she overextends it. 

 

The woman lets out a sob, “You said I wouldn’t have to jump.”

 

“I’m sorry ma’am, but I do this for a living okay, I’ve never dropped anyone. So please, just a push.” Kara pleads, quickly wiping at her lips that are salty with sweat. 

 

The woman extends her arm out to Kara again and Kara can just nearly reach her. Kara can see her preparing to push off so she tightens her muscles to give her support while she leans. 

 

_ Boom! _

 

The apartment behind the woman that was on fire explodes as the fire hits a gas pipe in the kitchen. The force thrusts the woman forward but she’s frantic, shocked by the blast and unsure if Kara is truly going to catch her. Kara nearly turns away at the blast but her helmet shield keeps her protected as she reaches for the falling woman. 

 

Kara grips the woman’s forearm and then feels the weight of gravity pulling them. Her feet slip on the ladder and she has to self correct her body without dropping the woman. She falls against the metal ladder and she can feel the metal hitting her body on impact. Her arm is out over the ladder still holding onto the woman but a rung of the ladder is right under her armpit and she can feel her shoulder’s muscles extend and tear beyond possibility. She lets out a scream in pain and it causes the woman to scream with her. 

 

Kara looks away from the woman for a second, her eyes watering with the amount of pain in her arm. She blinks the tears away and turns back to the woman. The woman is crying and looking down. Kara can see all of the news camera’s have turned their attention onto them.

 

_ Please, God, don’t let Lena see this. _

 

This is the exact opposite of being careful. This was reckless but she has the woman in her grasp and she isn’t going to give up now. She takes a deep breath and shouts for the woman.

 

“Just look at me okay! Don’t look down. I know it’s tempting but I just need you to focus on me okay.” The woman turns her head to Kara and sniffles. “What’s your favorite food?”

 

“My- My favorite food?” The woman asks in bewilderment at the topic choice while they're both clinging for life. 

 

“Yeah,” Kara winces in pain as she reaches with her free hand for her harness clips. “I’m partial to potstickers. Not too greasy and not super fruity. Just kind of in the perfect middle.” 

 

Kara turns her hand back to look to see where her clips are and she looks back to see the woman looking down again. “No, no. Look at me okay? Favorite food, go.”

 

The woman turns to look at Kara. “I- I like fettucini alfredo. My mom has a family recipe she gave me and I like that.”

 

Kara blindly moves the clips against the ladder’s bar until it clicks. She can feel the tension around her waist at the extended strap. She looks back quickly and below her she sees Lucy helping Alex strap in and get on the ladder. She turns to the woman who is looking past Kara and to the clouds. 

 

“They look like anything?” Kara asks as she starts to use what strength she has left to pull the woman up, she’s carefully shuffling down the ladder to pull her up.

 

“Um, one of them. One of them looks like a dog with wings.” Kara smiles.

 

“I’ll have to take your word for it.” Kara focuses on the woman and the ladder, unwilling to take her eyes off of either. 

 

Alex takes her first few steps on the ladder and it jostles all the way to Kara at the top. The woman screeches and Kara squeezes at her forearm to get her attention. 

 

“It’s okay, it’s just help. Okay? Keep telling me about the clouds.” Kara has half of her upper arm back to being supported by the ladder. 

 

Kara feels the tension of her harness loosen a bit as she is crawling down the ladder. The woman continues to tell Kara about the things she sees in the clouds and Kara makes offhanded comments as she tries to get her footing back on the rungs. She looks over her shoulder to see Alex nearly at her. Kara gets her feet supported on the rungs and she tries to pull her torso up but the weight is too much on her hyperextended arm. 

 

Kara feels a hand on her back and she turns to see Alex. Alex starts to pull at Kara’s torso but when Kara winces and swears at her sister she stops. 

 

“Help me get her up.” Kara nods towards the woman and Alex looks forward before stepping a bit in front of her sister. 

 

With Alex’s two working arms and Kara’s semi-working arm they are able to pull the woman onto the ladder. Alex motions to Lucy and the ladder starts to rattle as it comes down and settles against the fire engine. Kara finally lets go of the woman but she just leaps and puts her arms around Kara’s neck. 

 

“Thank you.” The woman cries into Kara’s shoulder and Kara just hesitantly pats her back while looking at Alex for help as to what she should do.

 

Alex points over to the ambulance and Kara nods. “Let’s get you some oxygen and a doctor, okay?” 

 

Together the three of them slip off of the engine and Alex, thankfully, takes the woman from Kara to the ambulance. Kara walks around the other side of the engine to see Lucy walking towards her. Lucy hugs Kara and squeezes her back hard enough for them to hear some joints pop. 

 

“You idiot! You could have died!” Lucy finally lets go of Kara only to hit her in the back of the helmet, the helmet jostles forward and Kara has to fix it. 

 

“But I didn’t,” Kara says as she settles her helmet into position. “Is that it?” Kara looks around at the other engines and the people taken from the two buildings. 

 

Lucy nods, “Yeah, we just need to get the new fire that came from that lady’s room under control and we’ll be good.”

 

Kara nods her head and shuffles away from Lucy to hide in the engine. She tries to roll her shoulder but a stinging pain shoots through her nerves on her right arm. Kara groans and clutches it. Kara looks out to the sky and she sees the sun trying to dip behind the horizon and she rubs her forehead. Her body is exhausted but the work isn’t done. Her body aches to go home, not her apartment but to Lena, and curl up with her on Lena’s couch while she falls asleep. She doesn’t think about the implications of calling Lena home but she tries to recall the feeling of Lena against her when kissed and when Lena would lean into Kara’s side to snuggle. 

 

She lets out a sigh and then stands back up and leaps off of the engine. She rolls her left shoulder, careful to not move her right arm much as she walks around to see if anyone needs help. 

 

She’s in the middle of talking about a situation report between three other firehouses that have shown up when it happens. The fire of the first two buildings have calmed down and firefighters are starting to unattach the hoses from hydrants. The ambulances are full and being readied to leave. The reporters are wrapping up and Kara feels her body loosen as the emergency comes to a calm. 

 

_ Boom! Boom! Boom! _

 

Everyone huddles and puts their hands over their head. Multiple screams and yells ring through the air as the building across the street explodes on three levels. The glass shatters and the levels are up in flames in an instant. Kara looks up and puts a hand to her mouth as the flames start to engulf other floors and soon the building’s upper half is ablaze. 

 

She can hear Alex shouting out orders and police officers shouting for a larger blockade. 

 

“I need Engines 13, 25, 28, and 4 focusing all water hydrants on that building from bottom to top! I need Engines 59, 7, and 3 prepped and ready for entry as soon as those fires are out and there’s an opening. I want Engine 9 prepped and ready to make an entrance from the roof and Engine 34 to prep for entrance from the floors below.” 

 

Kara shakes herself from her shock and she’s running to her oxygen tank. She slips the oxygen mask in place and attaches the breathing tube before she leans down and lifts her tank on. She bites her tongue, hard enough for it to bleed, as she puts the tank up and over her right shoulder. The weight of the tank and the position of the strap irritates and inflames her wounds but she’s already running to Alex to breach. 

 

―

 

Lena is reviewing a cost analysis for the children’s ward and she’s cross reviewing it with their other expenses as she tries to allocate funds in order to cover a handful of patients’ expenses. She takes money from a few different funds and divides it out into the children’s ward. Her pen flies over the numbers as she does the math in her head. 

 

“-and after that phenomenal rescue by one firefighter holding a dangling woman from the ladder,”

 

Lena blocks out the news, only listening for keywords like _Kara, Danvers,_ and _Engine_ _59._ She sets the finances down for a moment to pick up her bowl and pick at her salad. She hears Smokey’s heavy breathing as he presses his snout up against the floor to ceiling windows. Big huffs of breath are released as his nose gets squished against the glass. She can see the faint fog outlines he’s pressing on the glass and she rolls her eyes with a laugh. 

 

“-they were ready to leave until the office building across the street exploded and caught fire-”

 

Lena stands up and opens her fridge to look through what she bought at the dog store with Smokey earlier in the day. She pulls the canned food from the fridge and looks over the nutritional facts. She cracks open the can and pours it into a bowl before pressing a spoon against it and flattening the can-shaped meat and then she cuts some of it up into pieces. 

 

She walks to Smokey and kneels down next to him. She places the bowl at his feet and taps it with her nails a few times to get his attention. He looks at the meat and then presses against the glass again, ignoring the food and Lena all together. Lena sighs and tries again, she pushes it in front of him and he looks down before his paw nudges the bowl and it slides against the floor. 

 

“Well, it’s there if you need it.” Lena gives up and stands to get a bowl of water. 

 

She reaches above her head and stretches out her back, she’s been trying to stay awake for Kara’s call but the time is nearly eight o’clock in the evening and she’s tired. Smokey gave her a workout when they went shopping. 

 

She turns on her heels when she hears Smokey bark. He’s been quiet the entire day, barely barked except for when one lady’s maltese crossed their path and Smokey wanted to play but the lady pulled her dog along. This bark is different. Where it was soft and inquisitive, he now sounds agitated and angry. He even leaps against the glass and starts to scrape his paws against the glass. 

 

“Smokey! Down!” He turns to look at her and whimpers but he settles down on all fours. He starts to bark and whimper wildly as sirens wail below them on the street. 

 

Lena walks over to her bedroom and pats her thighs to get his attention, “Smokey, bedtime. Come on, bedtime.” 

 

He ignores her and he starts to whimper louder, he starts to stand on his hind legs then remembers Lena’s reprimand so he falls onto his stomach, laying flat against the floor. His head falls to the floor and his whimpers start to sound like cries. Lena rubs at her temples, unsure what to do. She walks to her phone, unplugging it from the side table by the couch, and she opens her contacts to find Kara. 

 

“-we are just getting reports of another explosion on one of the previously extinguished floors.” 

 

She starts texting Kara, first asking about her calling and then asking about what to do when he whimpers and whines.

 

“According to Fire Chief J’onn J’onzz, there are eight, I repeat, eight, firefighters stuck in the building due to the explosion.”

 

Before Lena hits send she looks up to the television at J’onn’s name. 

 

“The Fire Chief says so far it is, Alexander Shetfield from Engine 13-”

 

Lena sets her phone down and turns up the volume on the television as she sits on the couch. Her hands grip the material of the couch cushions tightly. The television has drowned out Smokey’s whines and barks.

 

“-Lucy Lane from Engine 59, Kara Danvers from Engine 59, and-”

 

Lena’s heart sinks into her stomach, she feels someone poking daggers into her chest, poking holes in her lungs as it gets harder to breathe. The room starts spinning as her mind just repeats five words. 

 

_ Kara Danvers from Engine 59. _

 

The noise of Smokey’s barking, the sirens that blare by and the television turns to ringing in her ears as she focuses on the headline underneath the news anchor.

 

_ Eight Trapped Fire Fighters _ .

 

The scrolling text below the headline shows the names once more along with their engines and stations. Lena reaches up to her collar and pulls on her t-shirt as if it was constricting her breathing. Her breathing quickens and she can’t feel her legs. 

 

The world is so loud with its incessant ringing and spinning that she doesn’t hear the vibrations of her cell phone. She doesn’t see Alex’s contact picture light up. She doesn’t see the voice message she leaves. She doesn’t see Alex’s texts. She doesn’t see Sam’s contact appear on her screen. She doesn’t see the ten voice messages Sam leaves. 

 

Everything’s too much. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> leave a comment maybe. chapter 11 is somewhere on the way!
> 
> and im on tumblr @ [canaries](http://canaries.tumblr.com)


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